One For The Road
by WritingStoriesEveryday
Summary: Christian and Ana meet at a party, but leave it under special circumstances. They do not see each other for four years, but when they meet again, there is something there which neither of them can deny. On hiatus!
1. Chapter 1 - The Beginning

**Chapter 1 - The Beginning**

For some reason, life doesn't always turn out like you have planned. As a kid you expect your life to unfold as the movies or in my case the books that I've read countless times. I always thought that by now I would've found my purpose but instead, here I am at Washington State University with my major undecided. At first, I thought that I would study English literature and work within the publishing industry but the more I thought about the job opportunities the more impractical it seemed. If I'm going to be in debt the rest of my life at least I have to study something that will pay out in the end. Don't get me wrong, my goal isn't to be rich but I want to be able to live. Be independent, travel and not always have to think about money. On the other hand literature and reading is my dream and I'm not sure if I'm ready to give it up.

Two weeks of the semester has passed and I have settled into the dorm room and the college lifestyle. I get along with Kate, my new roommate. She's gorgeous… and kind of intimidating. Kate seems like a very hands-on and direct kind of person. As I got to experience first-hand the first day we met. Her policy is every question is worth asking, which is perfect since she's majoring in journalism to as she says "keep up the family tradition". As a consequence of her inquisition we got to know each other pretty well. I've never really had many friends before. I have a few back home but honestly I doubt that our friendship could survive 133 miles and college. To be honest I think that my closest friends are my mom and my dad, but there are certain things that you can't comfortably discuss with your parents such as sex and relationships. That is why I hope that Kate and I can be friends and we're off to a great start.

Kate has been invited to an off-campus party tonight that according to her is going to be "totally fun". I roll my eyes at her and agree to accompany her to the party. I mean it could be fun; I've never really been to a party before. So, here we are now, blasting music as we're getting ready. Kate is wearing a dark blue dress that compliments her figure and bronzed skin. Her heels are sky high and as I watch her walk around the room i become more impressed Kate is wearing a dark blue dress that compliments her figure and bronzed skin. Her heels are sky high and as I watch her walk around the room I become more impressed by the fact that she walks around effortlessly. As if walking on four inch sticks is the most comfortable thing in the world. I go to my closet and pick out an outfit that consists of black jeans, a t-shirt and a pair of black Converse and when I'm done I sit back down and wait for Kate. I can feel I pair of eyes looking at me. I look up from my book to find Kate looking at me through her mirror as she is curling her hair.

"Are you really going to go to the party dressed like that?" she says with surprise in her voice.

"Is there something wrong with what I'm wearing?" I ask looking down at my outfit. I think it looks good but in this case, she's the expert.

"It's not that it's ugly… it's just boring." She says as she styles her now perfectly curled hair. Kate goes into my closet searching for something. After a few moments she realizes that the rest of my clothes are just as boring as those I have on and gives up. She walks over to her closet and hands over a black tank top with criss-cross detailing on the chest along with some red pumps. "Now, put this on."

I do as she says and then she starts to do my make-up. She puts a bit of eyeshadow and a little bit of eyeliner and mascara. Then she sculpts my cheeks with some bronzer and finishes of the look with red lipstick that matches the heels I'm wearing. When I look myself in the mirror I barely recognize myself. My legs are long and toned due to the shoes that I have on. My face is upgraded from the ordinary to the kind of hot. My blue eyes are enhanced by the makeup, my lips look plump and my hair falls straight down my shoulders. I must say that I'm very impressed by Kate's skills.

"Now you're ready!" Kate says proudly while admiring her handy work.

"Do you have everything?" I ask her while avoiding her statement. Accepting compliments is not one of my talents.

"Yup, phone, portable charger, money, pepper spray, condoms and liquor." She says "You?"

"I think so…"

"Then let's get the party started," Kate says while dragging me through the door. "Tonight is going to be so much fun!" She squeals.

I thought that I would be the designated driver but clearly, Kate had other plans. She had ordered an Uber for us and then she proceeded to tell me with a stern voice to have fun, "Just let loose, Steele!"

When we arrived at the small apartment it was jam packed. People were holding red plastic cups and talking loudly in small groups that were distributed evenly throughout the apartment. Suddenly, high pitched squeals fill the tight space and few girls start to dance and sing along in the middle of the living room. Guys start to join the girls with hopes of getting lucky. The hot and sultry air seemed to pound with the beat of the music. Kate took my hand and led me to the impromptu dance floor and started to dance herself. Her sensual moves made it seem like she was one with the music.

"Come on Ana! Dance with me I love this song." She whisper-yells in my ear. I start to dance. My hips sway and I try my best to mimic Kate. Slowly but surely I start to relax and dance without feeling as self-conscious.

We are laughing and having fun when a guy starts to dance with Kate. He is tall and has brown hair that is a little bit too long which makes him seem younger than he probably is. For what I can see he has a slim body and a great dancer. Kate seems to be enjoying the attention so I decide that I should go get myself something to drink. I go to the kitchen grab two cups and pour some liquor and soda to make it taste better.

"Elliot, I don't understand what I'm doing here. I should be home working not being here with a bunch of drunk people." A man says behind me.

"Relax, bro, live a little! This is your perfect opportunity for you to get laid. I swear if you don't start using your dick it will shrivel off." Another man answers and laughs.

"I'm leaving - this is a complete waste of time. I can't believe I came with you to this shithole."

"Chris, calm down I was joking. Here drink this; I'll owe you back I promise. I need you to be my wingman. Lord knows I need to get laid."

"Elliot, I don't even know what a wingman is."

"Basically your job is to make me look good in front of the ladies. That shouldn't be too hard - I mean look at me."

"If you look so good then why the hell do you need me?"

I started to ignore their conversation and instead I concentrated on making our drinks. Taking the two cups I turn around and start walking towards the living room. However, a person stands in my way and I end up spilling the drink on me and the other person. My clumsiness strikes again, and there I stand wet and mortified.

"I'm so sorry!" I cry out to the stranger while looking for something that I can clean up the mess with. "Here, let me help you dry off…" and before I know what is really happening I feel I hard push. I land on my right hand, and it hurts pretty badly. I cry out in pain.

"Hey! What the hell do you think you're doing?!" Kate yells at the stranger. I look up and I'm met with a pair of beautiful gray eyes. All his features on his face are beautiful but his eyes are by far the most striking. There are so expressive and right now I all I see is fear, he looks like a scared little boy. My heart flutters and aches at the thought of a little boy being afraid. The only thing though is that the boy isn't a boy at all. He's a man around his twenties with copper hair and a well-toned physique. And he probably is the most handsome man I have ever met. He looks around the room for someone or for something as he murmurs to himself.

Kate is by my side and carefully takes my hand and examines it. It is swollen and I can feel it throbbing. I hope that it isn't broken… it's the hand I write with and I don't have insurance. He bends down and takes a closer look at me. I see his eyes widen when he sees my face and can feel his eyes roaming my body. My cheeks flush at the thought of how I must look like right now.

"You have to forgive me, it was an instinct. I wasn't prepared." He says pleadingly.

"Get away from her asshole, you have caused enough trouble," Kate yells at him.

The party starts to die down a bit due to the commotion and I can see people start to gather around us. I try to get up so that we can get away from the people looking at us. My cheeks are now burning from the attention.

"Kate, I'm fine I just need to get some ice on it and it will be as good as new." I try to look optimistic but that is all ruined when I move my hand and a groan escapes my mouth.

"Ana, I'm taking you to the hospital, it looks broken." She says sternly

"I can drive you to the hospital." The attractive man says.

Both Kate and I look over at him. Did he just offer to drive me to the hospital? What a shame that I'm not going. I cannot afford to go to the doctor right now. I don't want to call my dad and ask for money it will just add to his worries. Kate glares at him with such anger that it makes him back off a little.

"You are not going near us. We're taking a cab and you're going to disappear before this starts getting creepy. You said your apologies, Ana doesn't accept them. Just walk away." As Kate speaks she starts pointing a finger towards him. She's starting to get aggressive.

"Hey, get your hands away from my brother. What the fuck is going on?" a blonde man steps in between the copper haired guy and Kate. He's taller than average and has long dirty blonde hair that reminds me of Kate's. The only difference is that Kate's hair is lighter and the new guy's hair is more like honey. He's also muscular like his brother.

"Your brother pushed my best friend for no apparent reason and now she has a broken wrist. Ana come on we're going." She gathers our stuff, takes my uninjured hand and leads me out of the apartment. Of course, we don't move very fast because I can barely walk in the killer heels I'm in anymore. My feet hurt almost as much as my hand. Kate tries to call an Uber but she doesn't have any reception. She lets out and frustrated grunt. We're both thinking about how we're getting back to our dorms when the two brothers appear.

"I insist on driving you to the hospital. Look what happened was an accident; let me make it up to you." The copper haired boy said to me. I was going to insist that I didn't need medical attention when I looked up at him. I don't know how but suddenly I found myself in his car and on our way to the hospital.

The ride was awkward, to say the least. No one said anything and the only thing you could hear was the motor as the copper haired god drove. It was a very nice car, the kind of car that only rich people have. Kate kept asking me if I was okay and if there was something she could do for me. I noticed that she felt bad like this was somehow was her fault. I tried to make her feel better, but she only responded that no one is going to touch me ever again. The car was once again silent and somehow even more uncomfortable than before.

"So… my name is Elliot and this is my brother Christian. We're both very sorry for what happened. What are your names?" Elliot said trying to start a conversation.

Kate just looked out the window, ignoring Elliot. "My name is Ana and her name is Kate." I took a deep breath "would you mind if you drove us back to our dorms instead of the hospital, I'm fine really."

"No, I'm driving you to the hospital," Christian says with a stern voice. He almost sounds angry.

"I'm sorry but it isn't your decision to make. I don't want to go to the hospital, you can't make me." I answer him. I'm well aware that I sound like a petulant child, but he is really getting on my nerves.

"You need to get your hand checked out, it could be broken." He says it like he's explaining something to a three-year-old.

"You don't need to talk to me like I'm a child; I'm an adult and can make my own decisions."

"It doesn't seem like it." He mutters under his breath.

"You know what, screw you. If it weren't for you I wouldn't be in this mess. There are several reasons as for why I don't want to go to the hospital. One - I'm fine I just need to rest, two - I don't want to be near you and three - I DON'T HAVE AN INSURANCE. So just drop us off wherever you can."

The silence in the car is now unbearable and the air is filled with tension. Kate just looks at me like I have grown a new head. She looks proud and sad at the same time.

"I will help you pay the bill, just get your hand checked out, please," she whispers in my ear. I sigh and close my eyes. I don't want to argue anymore.

When I open my eyes again were at the hospital, there is barely anyone around in the ER. The doctor throws a quick look at my hand and immediately says that it is most likely broken. X-ray is just a formality. My hand was indeed broken and they put a cast on my right arm. Christian and Elliot seem to have disappeared when I'm done and I found myself disappointed by that. I go out to the reception to find out how much I owe the hospital since I don't have insurance.

"It's already been dealt with, dear. You don't owe us anything. A handsome young man paid for everything. Oh, and before I forget he asked me to give you this for your cab back home." The nurse explained to me.

The journey back home was silent. We were both tired and wanted to go to bed. After taking off our makeup and putting our pajamas on, we lay on our beds. And as I laid there I found myself wondering if I was ever going to see Christian again.


	2. Chapter 2 - The Interview

**Chapter 2 - The Interview**

Kate has been sick with the flu for the past week and therefore I have tried to avoid our apartment as much as possible. I've taken on more shifts at the hardware store and studied in the library instead than at home. I feel awful for just ditching her at home and letting her mend for herself but the thing is that she's insufferable when she's sick. Everything is wrong, the weather, her bed, the food she's eating... In consequence, I choose to flee the scene and avoid any conflicts that may arise.a

In the end, I choose to have a degree in English literature and have a minor in economics. That way I have something to fall back on if my career in literature doesn't follow through. Lately, I haven't done anything but study and work. Finals season is finally here and everyone – including myself – is stressing out. I really want to keep my 4.0 GPA, so that I hopefully can get a job as soon as I graduate. I've applied for a job in every publishing house in Seattle, and just to make sure I have applied for some none literature related jobs. I want to start working as soon as possible.

I walk into our apartment with my hands full of groceries that I bought after work to find Kate on our sofa with her laptop in her lap. She is wearing her pink flannel pajamas with cute bunnies on that she only wears when she's sick or depressed. I've been lucky to find Kate, not only is she my best friend but she lets me live in her apartment almost for free. So, in turn, I have taken upon myself the main responsibility for the chores around the house. I don't mind them but Kate hates doing them… and she's pretty bad at it.

"Finally, you're home! I hate to ask this of you but could you please do me a favor?" Kate says with her voice throaty and thick from the flu. She looks awful with deep, dark blue bags under her eyes and a bright, red nose. "You now that I was supposed to interview this billionaire megalomaniac tomorrow for the student paper… can you please, please do it for me? I don't want to cancel it took me ages to get this interview."

"I don't know Kate, I've never interviewed someone before and he seems like a pretty big deal. Can't you ask someone else?" I answer her.

"No. Please, Ana, I will give you all the questions for the interview then all you have to do is record the conversation on your phone and write down some thoughts. Please, I'm begging you." I know right there that I'm doing it. I'm going to interview the billionaire megalomaniac. He's most likely an old, bald and arrogant man that has somehow managed to make a name for himself. "Yes! Thank you! I love you!" she starts to yell but begins coughing instead.

"I haven't said anything yet." I mutter.

"You don't need to I can see it in your eyes that you're doing it." She says pleased.

I sigh, give up and start moving towards the kitchen so that I can start with the tomato soup I planned to make for dinner.

I have to be in Seattle by 08.20 am because the interview starts at 08.30. That means that I have to leave the apartment by five am to make it in time. I hate waking up early. I pack everything I need the night before and lay out the outfit I borrowed from Kate on my chair that's in the corner of my room. The walls are a blue and all the furniture is white. There are books everywhere, in the gigantic bookshelf, on the bedside table and on the pile next to my bookshelf because they no longer fit in it.

In the morning I wake up to complete darkness which makes it a thousand times harder to actually get up. I yelp in the shower when ice cold water hits my naked body before it warms up. I meticulously wash my body and shave my legs, careful not to wet my hair. I put on a gray skirt and flower printed blouse that I laid out the night before. Put some mascara on and try to tackle the mess that is my hair. I decide to put it up in a ponytail to get it out of my face. After a quick breakfast, I feel ready. I grab my things and walk out the door to Wanda. Beloved Wanda was a gift from my dad. It's an old, light blue VW Beetle that he bought from one of his friends. The only thing with Wanda is that she doesn't always start when you need her to. Right now is a fine example. After ten minutes I give up and go back in to fetch Kate's car keys.

2 hours and 29 minutes later I am in Seattle. Now the only thing left to do is to find Christian Grey's office that according to Kate is hard to miss. I follow the instructions on the GPS and soon I see the massive tower that's supposed to be Grey Enterprises Holdings. The nerves that I've tried to avoid all morning come with full force once I stepped out my car walked over to the ginormous building. The reception was immaculate and decorated with a color scheme of white, black and gray. Everyone in sight was the epitome of professionalism. Every person was dressed in some kind of suit that matched the colors in the décor.

"Hello, welcome to Grey Enterprises Holdings what can I do for you?" The receptionist smiled at me showing her unnaturally white teeth. Her blonde hair was in a very intricate hairdo that made me feel insecure of my own hair. She was very pretty.

"Hey, my name is Anastasia Steele and I'm supposed to conduct an interview with Christian Grey at 08.30." the receptionist kept smiling while she checked the computer "I'm sorry but you're not on the calendar."

"I'm the replacement for Kate Kavanagh. She's sick and asked me to step in; she said that she had contacted you yesterday." I smiled at her and checked the time. Seven minutes left before the interview is supposed to start.

"Oh, I'm sorry I see the changes in the calendar now. Here you go, just clip this to your jacket. Take the elevator to the 20th story. Andrea will receive you."

I thank her and go to the elevator. The elevator moves with a high speed and after what seem like no time at all the doors open and reveal a similar looking reception. Andrea, another blond dressed in a black and white dress welcomes me and guides me to the waiting area. She offers me some beverages but I kindly decline her offer. As she walks away I look for the papers with the questions on it when it dawns on me that I know nothing about the man I am about to interview. The uncertainty makes me even more nervous.

"Miss Steele, Mr. Grey will see you now." Andrea says.

I rise, take my purse and try to regulate my breathing. Are my legs shaking? I hope not. I walk to the closed office door, knock and proceed to walk in. The office is an odd mixture of personal and industrial. The colors are bland – gray and white – but the art on the walls give a more personalized feel.

"Miss Steele." A hand takes mine in a firm handshake that sends shivers down my spine. He has long, slender fingers. I bet he would be good on the piano. "I'm Christian Grey."

I look up and can't believe my eyes. It's the guy that broke my wrist. Christian Grey, the billionaire megalomaniac that Kate has been hounding for the past month for an interview is the same Christian that pushed me four years ago? I feel my eyes widen and cheeks flush at the memory. I feel bad for the way Kate treated him, after all, it was an accident. He's copper hair is more unruly than I remember and he has a slight stubble on his face. He's black suite emphasizes his muscular body. I wonder if he remembers me…

"Anastasia Steele, sir. I'm here because Miss Kavanagh is sick." It feels weird calling someone that's just a few years older than me sir.

"Oh, do you work with her at the school paper?"

"Uhm, no I read English literature with Kate… Uhm Miss Kavanagh, and we live together, sir."

He seemed to think about my answer a little bit and then motions for me to sit down on the L-shaped sofa. He sits across from me and looks expectantly at me. His eyes seem to search for something in my face, maybe he does recognize me. I take my phone and start to record the conversation.

"Mr. Grey, you're very successful in your field, to what do you owe your success?" I read all the questions out loud that are on the paper Kate gave me. There are a few questions that seemed to strike a nerve. Especially those about poverty, his adoption, and his sexuality but for the most part, they were the typical questions that one would get asked in every interview. I feel sorry for him; it must be very boring to get the same questions over and over again.

Now that the interview is technically over should I mention the incident or should I just let it go? I really do want to apologize…

"Are there any more questions that you want to ask Miss Steele?" Come on tell him, Steele! My subconscious told me.

"No, but there is something I want to say." I take a deep breath, "I don't know if you remember me but I want to apologize for mine and Kate's behavior four years ago. I know that the push was an accident, but I didn't let you apologize and then you paid for my medical bill and the cab home. I didn't even get the chance to thank you and your brother." I say quickly.

I take the phone and turn off the recording. I stand up and gather my things. I should get going, he is a very busy man. He seems speechless when he finally realized who I was.

"You're Ana?" he asks.

"The one and only..." he stares at me. It feels like he can see through me. There's something very hypnotizing about his gaze and I think it's addictive. I can't look away from those eyes. "I would like to pay you back for all the costs of my medical bill." I say.

He frowns and looks at me a little confused. His frown creates two tiny wrinkles between his eyebrows that look extremely soft and he has a slight pout on his mouth.

"No, I don't want your money. Like you said that night, it was my fault."

"Please, I insist."

"No, I refuse to take your money. I don't need it, I don't know if you know this about me but I'm a billionaire." He says sounding very angry.

"Let me make it up to you somehow. I do genuinely feel bad for what happened."

He let his fingers run through his hair and sighed. He looked around the office for something, maybe some kind of inspiration. I see him staring at something behind me and when I turn around I see an abstract painting of two lovers. Then I feel his gaze back on me and he has a shy smile on his face.

"I know how you can make it up to me. Go on a date with me." He says unsure while looking at me expectantly.

I'm in shock. He doesn't even know me. The last time I saw him he literally pushed me away because I was too close. I still don't know what that was about. Yet, he really is an Adonis and from what I learned from Kate's questions is that he is generous and loves his family. And there is this undeniable feeling I get when he looks me that spreads like wildfire in my body. Christian Grey truly seems like the perfect man.

Do I want to go on a date with him? Yes!

Should I go out on a date with him? No.  
Why? Because if I get the job that I applied for here, then I'll be dating my bosses, bosses, boss and that would be unethical. Not to mention all the backlash we both could receive. This has the potential to ruin us both.

"I would love to… but I can't I'm sorry."

I take my things and start walking to the door. Andrea stands up when she sees me and wishes me a good day. I'm already in the elevator when I see Christian standing by the doors as their closing. Confusion clearly reflected on his face.

"Anastasia," Christian says.

"Christian," I say back sadly and already wondering if this is really the right decision.


	3. Chapter 3 - The Call

**Chapter 3 - The Call**

I take a deep breath as I walk through the doors that take me to the wet streets of Seattle. People walk past me with umbrellas and eyes focused forward. Cool raindrops hit my face as I stare at the cars driving past me. My stomach dropped and I felt like someone had taken a grip on my heart and squished it hard. I walked slowly towards Kate's car and sat in the driver's seat. It's too quiet, I thought. Rolling in the Deep by Adele fills the small space as I turn on the radio. I turn up the volume and try to blast away my thoughts about what just had happened, but it doesn't really work.

Maybe my decision up there was a bit rash, I mean just because we go on ONE date doesn't mean that it will go on a second one or that our relationship will develop into something more. Let's say that we go on a date and he finds my addiction with books weird or maybe it turns out that he has a foot fetish. If those things were to happen I wouldn't have to worry about the conflict of interest thing in the workplace. Yet, something in me says that what we have has the potential to turn into something magical. The feelings he brings out of me when he looks at me are completely new to me, not to mention the rush I feel when he touches me. No one has ever made me feel that way before. And after all, he did ask me out so he must be interested in me, right? Or maybe he just feels sorry for you, my subconscious tells me.

The way I see it, I have two options – go back and accept his request or just drive away and never see him again. The thought of never seeing him again made me surprisingly sad. Before I could consider what happened next, I went determinedly back into the building. I walked past the receptionist with the abnormally white teeth that wail at me to stop. When she catches up with me I'm already in the elevator and the doors are closing. The only thing I could think about was Christian and the thought of my impulsivity made me giddy. Logically, I know that the elevator moves at the same pace as it did before but now it seems to go slower, much slower. I noticed that a woman with ebony skin and red hair looked at me with intrigued eyes.

"Are you crazy?" she asks with a smirk.

"Maybe a little bit, you?" I answer her.

"Aren't we all a little bit mad?" she smiles at me as the elevator opens its doors.

The door to Christian's office is closed and Andrea seems to be focused on something on her computer screen. If I stop now, I know that I will chicken out and I've come way too far for that. I try to swallow the lump in my throat as I hurriedly walk to his office without knocking first. Christian looks up from whatever he's doing on his desk with a look of complete surprise.

"Ma'am, you can't do that." Andrea hollers at me.

"I forgot to say something to Mr. Grey," I answer without looking at her, my eyes only focused on him. He watches me closely. "If you don't mind, Sir. It's kind of important and it won't take long I promise." He continues to look at me.

"It's fine, Andrea." He says to Andrea while looking at me intrigued and confused.

"But, Sir… your next meeting starts now."

"Delay it."

"Ohm, yes, Sir." Andrea answers him and closes the door as she walks out.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to be an inconvenience." I start. "There is something that I would like to say. I'm sorry… I'm sorry for what happened at the party and for what happened just a while ago. You deserve to know why I said no. It isn't because I don't find you attractive; in fact, I think that you're one of the most good-looking men I have ever seen, and it isn't because I don't feel attracted to you because I do. The reason why I said no is because I have applied for a job here, or rather an internship that could develop into a job opportunity. So, if I would get the job offer here it would be a conflict of interest. People would assume that I was given the job for the wrong reasons and you would be accused of other things. But as I was sitting in the car I realized that there is a very simple solution for this and that is that if your company does offer me a job that I would simply decline and that way all the problems would be solved. Therefore if you still want to go on a date with me, I would gladly accept and if you don't I will walk away and regret that I said anything at all."

I stopped to draw breath after my rambling. I really hope he heard everything I said because I really don't want to repeat everything I just said. He looks at me amused but he doesn't say anything. His mouth shows a smile that would make any girl weak at the knees.I pray to God that I don't fall into a hyperventilating pile on the floor. His silence makes me uncomfortable, what is he waiting for? Just say yes or no. SAY SOMETHING, I scream at him in my head. I look down at the pristine floor and bite my lip. My hands start to get clammy so I wipe them down on my skirt. I can feel him coming closer and somehow I can feel his warmth even though he is standing to feet away.

"The offer still stands." He says with a soft voice like his telling a secret that only I can know. "And just so you now I don't care if my employees date each other as long they do their jobs."

I can feel my mouth open and close rapidly, probably giving me an appearance of a fish gasping for air on land. It finally sinks in what he said. He wants to go out on a date... with me. I'm so happy that I could start dancing but instead of embarrassing myself further I opt to do a little celebratory dance in my head. My bright smiles makes my cheeks hurt. Play it cool, Steele! I say to myself.

"Then I don't want to bother you anymore, Mr. Grey." I walk towards his desk, take a pen and start to write my phone number on the top right corner of one of the papers he had on his desk. Underneath my number I write "for second chances". Oh no, that's too corny! It's too late now. Should I put a smiley face on the end to make it more casual? No, you want to be sensual, not casual. "Well, I should get going then." I say as I turn around only to almost bump into him again. The way he looks at me makes me feel hot and bothered.

"You're not like anyone I've met before." He says.

"Is that a good or bad thing?" I ask him.

"I guess that will have to wait and see."

* * *

Trying to concentrate on work turned out to be impossible. I have kept my phone in the back pocket of my favorite jeans all day but it hasn't rung yet. I've tried to keep myself occupied with restocking the shelves and double checking orders for customers. Clayton's hardware store has been swamped now that summer is finally here. I glance at the clock; it's almost five which means that there is only one hour left of the workday.

Only a few days left of me working here. It feels bitter-sweet. I'm going to miss the simplicity of working here, the routine. Hopefully, I get a job in Seattle soon so that I can start saving for a trip to London. It's going to take years me of saving for me to be able to go… I wonder why Christian hasn't called me yet. It has been a whole day since I gave him my phone number. Maybe I should call him, after all, it is the 21 century... But then again, I don't have his phone number, damn it. Waiting for him to call it is.

The shop is almost empty when I decide to study for my economics final for a bit. The owners have told me that if the store is empty and if I've done everything there is to do, that I could discreetly study by the checkout counter. I'm relearning about fiscal policy and stimulus when I hear the distinctive _pling_ that tells me that a customer has walked in. After putting away my books as quickly as I possibly can I look up to find Paul Clayton by the door holding a big, brown box. He is smiling brightly at me with his all-American charm. He walks oven and puts the box on the counter. He is a student at Princeton University, studying business administration.

"Paul! How's it going?" I smile at him.

"Good, it feels good to be back home! You?"

"I'm good, thanks for asking."

"Ana, do you want to go on a date with me? There is this new…" he asks me.

Paul asks me out every time he is home. I've said no every time he has asked me out. I have several reasons for why I always say no. Firstly his brother owns the store, secondly, he lives across the country and thirdly I only see him as a friend. I've only told him the first two reasons and not the third. It's just that I don't want to hurt his feelings.

"No. Why do you keep asking if you already know what I'm going to answer?" I ask him curiously.

"The last thing to leave man is hope." He simply states while shrugging "and this time it's different. You won't be working here anymore so I thought that maybe you would change your mind. Why did you say no to a date this time?"

"Because I only see you as a friend, I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt your feelings."

"I guess I knew that. I just hoped that it would be different." Paul answers looking a bit crestfallen.

"Sorry, I hope that we still can be friends." But even in my own ears, it sounds like a poor excuse. He walks to the counter takes the box he came in holding. "Yeah, sure." he says and walks away.

I start to gather all my things and prepare the store for closing. As soon as I'm done I say goodbye to Paul with a sorry and a kiss on his cheek. I go outside to Wanda and start driving home. It's not until I'm cooped up in my room that I start to relax. I hate feeling guilty, that's why I avoid conflict. There's a soft knock on my door and then Kate comes in holding two bowls with chocolate ice cream. She gives me one of the bowls and sits on my bed. She looks at me with worried eyes.

"Do you want to talk about it?" she asks while she starts to eat her ice cream. Her voice is still a bit thick from her sickness but she already looks much better. I look down on my bowl and see that she poured some strawberry sauce on top, my favorite combination.

"How are you feeling?" I ask her. She answers that she feels much better and then our conversation develops into small talk.

I haven't told her that Christian is the same guy from the party. I'm afraid of her reaction, she can be very overprotective. She's also very stubborn and once she has made up her mind on something she won't change it. We haven't talked about the incident since the night it happened so I don't know what she thinks of Christian or his brother Elliot.

"Do you remember the guy that accidentally broke my wrist four years ago?" I ask her with my eyes focused on my ice cream "Well, it turns out that the guy was Christian Grey. He asked me out on a date the day of the interview and I kind of agreed. I gave him my number but he hasn't called me yet." I look up and meet her gaze "And I explained to Paul that I only see him as a friend."

"The Paul thing was for the best, he did deserve to know how you felt." She takes a breath and looks at me "Why didn't you tell me about Christian Grey?" she asks sounding a bit hurt.

"I was afraid of your reaction. You know that you can be a bit overprotective." I say weakly. I have said it before that she can be overprotective. She has been ever since the altercation with Christian.

"I'm sorry you felt that way. I'm supposed to be someone whom you can talk to. Do you like him?" she asks me. She's looking at me curiously. I've never shown any interest in guys before, she has even asked if I'm a lesbian. So, this must be like Christmas for her.

"Kate, I've met him one and a half times. I don't know him. The only thing I know is that I can't stop thinking about him. I think I'm becoming obsessed... Is there something wrong with me?"

"No! Not at all, what you have my friend is a crush. You should call him! Life is too short right?" She says simply. Kate is the most strong and independent woman I have ever met. She doesn't care what anyone thinks of her and that is a quality that I respect and admire about her.

"I don't have his personal phone number."

"Well, that's a bummer… wait my dad has his number." She says happily "Their business associates." Kate says with a deep voice that I think is supposed to be an impression of her dad. Kate's father is the head of Kavanagh media which is the biggest media company on the west coast. To say that her family is influential is an understatement.

"I doubt he will give you his number."

"Oh, that's where you're wrong. I'm his princess." she says while going to get her phone.

* * *

It is now Friday which means that finals are in exactly one week and even though I'm stressed out about it I feel pretty confident. I started studying very early and I feel as my hard work has paid off. So, for now, my strategy is to keep going through my notes and practice on practice tests. It has been two days since I interviewed Christian.

Kate, Jose and I are sitting on the floor around our coffee table in our living room talking. Jose is gay and has been our friend for three and a half years. We three have been pretty much inseparable ever since the day we met at a party. Kate told him about my crush on Christian. He was so shocked that he choked on the beer he was drinking and when the initial shock went away he started screaming "Hallelujah! Finally!". As the night progressed and we became a little bit more intoxicated we started playing Never Have I Ever. Now, I'm drunk because they ask things like "never have I ever stayed up all night reading" and because I'm a lightweight. I stand up on wobbly feet and walk to the bathroom because I really need to pee. Scrolling through my phone as I sit on the toilet I see Christian's number. Should I call it? No. I stand up, wash my hands and look myself in the mirror. The make-up Kate put on me looks flawless. I look pretty hot if I do say so myself. My phone pling's showing a text from my mom. I don't bother looking at it because I'm calling Christian. I giggle as my fingers press his number.

He answers almost immediately.

"Anastasia?" I hear a Christian's surprised voice through the tiny phone speaker. He voice sounds a little bit darker on the phone.

"Why haven't you called me yet?" I ask because drunken Ana goes straight to the point.

"How did you get my number?" he asks.

"I have my ways." I slurred. "Answer my question."

"You sound strange, Anastasia." He sighs "Have you been drinking?"

"I don't sound strange, you are strange!" Good comeback, Ana! "Why haven't you called yet?"

"I was going to call, tomorrow."

"I don't really believe you. If you changed your mind then you should've just said it."

"Where are you?" He sounds concerned.

"It's none of your business. I'm angry at you for not calling."

Jose comes barging in, being as loud as possible. It seems to be his life mission whenever he is the slightest bit buzzed or drunk – to be loud. "Ana, you have to come out to the party. We're waiting for you." Jose yells.

"Anastasia, who's that? You know what never mind. I want you to tell me where you are right now." He's sexy when he gives orders, I think to myself. But, Nevertheless, I don't like that he's trying to tell what to do. Jose starts dragging me back to the living room where Kate has put on loud music. I giggle.

"I'm in Portland. It's a long way from Seattle." I say to him.

"Where?" he yells at the phone.

"Home, why? What are you going to do about it?" I say to him provocatively. You're on fire tonight! I'm giving myself a high five.

"I'm coming over."


	4. Chapter 4 - The Reunion

**Chapter 4 - The Reunion**

Is he coming over? Oh, well, it takes a long time to get here from Seattle. I'll probably be sleeping by the time he finally gets here. I stare at the cell phone in my hand with wonder. I just called Christian Grey, the gorgeous control freak and told him what I felt... that makes me feel like I'm a strong, independent woman who isn't afraid to speak her mind! Well done, Steele! I think to myself while patting myself on the back. I walk over to the kitchen to get a glass of water so that I hopefully don't feel so hungover tomorrow. Kate comes over with a drink in hand. She looks happy and healthy. I'm glad she isn't sick anymore. "You're such a lightweight, Steele."

"He's coming over," I say to her simply. The music is still playing but someone turned down the volume. I refill my water and continue drinking it. Who would've known that water could be so delicious?

"Who's coming over?" she asks astonished.

"Christian Grey."

"What?!" Kate yells. "When did this happen?" She's looking at me closely.

Jose turns around to join the conversation. "When did what happen?" he asks while sipping on his beer.

"Christian Grey is coming over because I called him and asked why he hadn't called me yet. But, he is in Seattle so we won't see him until morning." I say shrugging, not understanding what the big deal was. Both Kate and Jose are looking at me with big eyes that looked at me with both wonder and humor. Then it sinks in what I have done. Shit, I called Christian Grey. I've ruined everything. My plan to be mysterious, fun and seductive went completely out the window. Now I seem like a needy, desperate little girl. Damn it!

"WHAT THE HELL HAVE I'VE DONE?" I squeal while covering my face with my hands. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!"

"That's for sure the most I've ever heard you swear. You must really be panicking." Kate says.

Just then we hear the telltale sound of the doorbell. He couldn't possibly get here so fast from Seattle, could he? It has been around 15 minutes since I spoke to him last. I hope that Kate or Jose ordered pizza and that the person knocking is just the pizza delivery guy, but judging by their faces, that is not the case. Jose, Kate and I look at the door in horror. "What am I supposed to do now?" I mutter to myself. Kate and Jose look at me with a look that says go open the door.

I think that I'm going to be sick… is the room spinning? My feet move forward. I take door handle and slowly press it down. The door is suddenly yanked open revealing two men. I recognize both of them immediately; it's Christian and his brother Elliot. Elliot hadn't changed much he was bigger than I remember, his body reminds me of a lumberjack for some reason. His hair is now dirty blond quite long. He looks good. Christian, on the other hand, looked edible. He had blue jeans on and a black t-shirt that enhanced his toned body. His hair looked tousled like he had run his fingers through his hair repeatedly. His features expressed worry.

"Hello. Do you want to come in?" I say embarrassed. He looks at me, examining me. I squirm under his relentless investigation. My cheeks redden. I could die from the humiliation.

"Are you okay?" he asks seriously. Did he drive all the way here just to check up on me?

"Yes, I'm drunk not dying," I mutter down on the floor. I hear a soft laugh from behind Christian. Elliot is trying really hard not to laugh at the situation, which I admit is so awkward that it's pretty funny. I join Elliot at the awkward laughing and so does Kate and Jose.

"Hey, I'm Elliot. Christian's brother." He says offering his hand towards me. He doesn't seem to recognize me at all. Well, it isn't that strange he met me briefly four years ago.

"She already knows who you are, asshole. She's the girl from the party." Christian sneers at him looking at his hand like he wants to yank it off his brother.

"What party?" he asks confused. "Wait, she's the girl you pushed that we had to drive to the hospital?"

"That would be me. I'm Ana." I say to him while taking his hand and smiling. Elliot seems like he is fun and down to earth. I like him already.

"And I would be the overprotective bitch named Kate." Kate says from behind me.

"And lastly I would be their gay best friend." Jose says while looking at Christian with one eyebrow raised. Jose knows something… maybe Christian is secretly gay as Kate suspected? Jose's radar for gay people is impeccable. That would really be a bummer; I'm really attracted to him.

Christian and Elliot walk into the apartment after our awkward meeting. Kate offers them a drink and we all sit down on the sofa but I in turn sit on the floor. I sit there looking at Christian looking uncomfortable sitting next to his brother on the end of the couch. How can someone human look that good? It isn't fair that he's so captivating to look at. It makes me distracted and I find it hard to concentrate on the conversation Elliot, Jose and Kate are having. Christian looks at me expressing the same feeling I saw the first time I saw him: fear. I don't know why but I know that this situation terrifies him. I tap the floor beside me, hoping that maybe he will feel better with me. He stands up from his place on the sofa at sits beside me on the floor.

"I'm sorry." I say to him.

"What are you sorry for?"

"For the call."

"It happens to everyone. It's nothing to worry about." He says. My eyes land on his lips, I've never noticed that they were so plump before. I wonder how they would feel on mine.

"Somehow I doubt that you have drunk dialed someone. Doesn't seem like your style." I laugh at him.

"Not drunk dialed but I've done my fair share of stupid things while drunk." He says timidly.

"Like what?"

"Honestly?" I nod while looking curiously at him. The man that seems to control every situation he's in has lost control at some time in his life. "I've started fights, blacked out… that kind of thing." He says looking down ashamed. He doesn't seem violent, in fact, I feel safe with him. That reminds me that I never actually said what my address was.

"How did you know where I was?" I ask him.

"You told me." he states.

"I know that, but I never gave you the address. How did you know?"

"I tracked your phone."

I guess it makes sense but it's creepy. How did he even do that? Isn't that illegal? Maybe he's a stalker..., my subconscious whispers. My mind still feels foggy.

"Are you guys in?" I hear Kate ask us.

"What?" I ask her.

"Never have I ever. Are you in?" She asks.

"Yeah, sure - why not?" I answer while shrugging. I look over at Christian, he shrugs.

"Bro, do you know how to play?" Elliot asks Christian with a broad smile.

"I'm not sure." he responds.

Kate and I stand to get the beer we have left in the fridge while Jose and Elliot update Christian with the rules of the game. I get a few glasses and a canister of water, just in case. Kate stops me when I start to walk back to the living room.

"When the sex questions come up, drink at least once. You wouldn't technically be lying because I know that you masturbate and that has to count for something. And Christian likes you - I can see it in the way he looks at you." Kate says while looking at me knowingly. I feel my blood pooling in my face making me look like a tomato.

We walk out to the guys. Elliot and Jose look smug and excited while Christian looks bored and nervous. When we reach them, Elliot suggests that we should do rock, paper scissors to decide who should start asking the questions. Kate wins.

"Never have I ever peed in a pool." Everyone laughs a little and takes a gulp of their beers. Next up is Elliot who says "Never have I ever shoplifted or stolen something." Jose and I are the only ones who don't drink to that. Jose stops to think about what is going to ask for a few seconds before says "Never have I ever had a crush on someone." Everyone drinks to that; while I blush… my current crush is sitting next to me.

What should I say? I don't know! My foggy brain finds it hard to focus on something else than the outline of Christians muscled arm. "Never have I ever… done something I regret." Good job, Ana. At this rate, you're going to depress everyone. Christian is the only one that drinks to that one… interesting.

Everyone moves their gaze to Christian. "Never have I ever had an orgasm." he says. Well, that escalated quickly. I can feel him watching me; he's waiting for my answer. I've never had sex with someone, so I couldn't have had an orgasm that way and even though I masturbate I've never gotten myself off. I don't have the patience for it, I always start but stop after a while. Should I just lie right know or go with the truth? It appears as my choice is made for me because almost everyone is looking at me with pity in their eyes. Christian, on the other hand, looks triumphant.

"Never have I ever had sex in a bed." Kate says and I drink immediately. Jose and Kate smile at me, while Christian looks like he bit into something sour. After a while, the game died out. Elliot and Kate seem to have it off. They're talking and holding hands. They look cute. Jose is standing by the open window talking to his boyfriend Gavin. I start feeling dizzy again so I try to stand up because I want to go to bed. I'm really out of it. Christian helps me up and I lean on him because I doubt that I could stand up straight right now. He lifts me up and asks me for directions to my room.

He puts me down on the bed softly. He walks to the bathroom and comes out holding two cotton pads that are soaked with what I assume is make-up remover. He gives me them and I start to rub them on my eyes. I feel his eyes following every move I make. I stand up to get my pajamas that are in the bottom drawer of my wardrobe. I search for a while for something that I could wear that is a little bit sexy but the only thing I find are old and worn t-shirts and shorts. I settle for the first thing that I find. With my hands full of my pajamas, I go to the bathroom to change.

The bathroom mirror doesn't reflect the prettiest of pictures. I look tired and I'm very red. Without the makeup, I had on before I feel more exposed. I brush my teeth and then I walk out of the room to find him looking through my bookshelf. I'm already in my bed when he turns around to look at me. My eyes feel heavy and I don't know if I'm able to stay awake for much longer.

"Why didn't you call me? I thought that you wanted to go out with me." I ask him in a whisper. I'm not really sure I want to hear his answer.

"I do want to go out with you." He answers.

"Then why didn't you call."

"It's stupid." I remain silent. He takes a deep breath. "I have never dated before so after you took off I went home to do some research. At first, I thought that I would call Elliot but I felt stupid… so… I watched romantic movies instead because I thought that women liked that kind of stuff. The general rule seemed to be to wait three days. So, that was my plan but instead, I fucked it up." he sighs.

I bite my lip to stop myself from laughing. That man really is as clueless as I am which makes me very happy. I can't hold it in anymore and I start to laugh. My laughter seems to be infectious as he starts to laugh with me. The laughter died out and left a comfortable silence.

"Would you please stay with me? I don't think that you or Elliot are going anywhere tonight. You can lay here with me if you'd like." I ask him while thinking about Elliot and Kate. He looks a bit lost.

"I've never done that before." He says.

"Done what?"

"Slept with a woman..."

"It's easy, make yourself comfortable and just lay your body next to mine. I won't touch you, I promise." I figured out by the way he stood at a safe distance from people that he is uncomfortable with touch.

I turn around and have my back facing him. I can almost hear the debate that is going on in his head. Almost when I think that he won't do it, I hear him take off his shoes and his pants and I feel how the mattress bends a little when lays next to me. His warmth feels comforting.

"Goodnight, Christian." I say while turning off my bedside table making the room pitch black.

"Goodnight, Ana." He says while taking my body and presses my back against his front.

* * *

Hello, everyone!

I just wanted to say thank you to every single person who took the time to read the story. I'm truly blown away by the positive feedback I've gotten and that so many people decided to follow and favorite this story.

I hope that I don't disappoint you in the future. xx


	5. Chapter 5 - The Accident

**Chapter 5 - The Accident**

I woke up uncomfortably warm. Someone's wrapped around me like a vine and I can hear a soft snoring in my ear. I tried to lift my pounding head from the pillow only to find that I can't get anywhere. A pair of strong arms pulled me closer towards the hot body I laid against. My mind is racing, trying to remember who it could be. I remember that I called Christian in the middle of the night, I cringe at the thought and that we played never have I ever. But, why would Christian sleep in my bed? It doesn't make sense... But, at the same time, who else could it be?

As discreetly as I can I remove the comforter from my body and relish the feeling of the cool air against my skin. I look down to find that I still have my pajamas on, which meant that no funny business had had happen last night... Right? I look down at the hands that hold me, they're big with fairly long, slender fingers. There a few hairs on top of his hands. They're definitely from a man. I try to think of Jose's hands, could they be his? He's known to want to cuddle when he's drunk. Jose's hands are darker and I think that he doesn't have as long fingers, so it isn't Jose. That could only mean that it was Christian, it had to be.

One of the hands lands near my heart, and subsequently near my breast. My heart starts to race a bit from the realization. My next try to sneak a peek of my guest is more successful and I can see Christian sleeping soundly next to me. I turn around to watch him sleep. He looks much younger and relaxed. His long eyelashes create small shadows down his cheeks and he has a tiny scar right under his left eyebrow. It's very faint and hard to notice.

I decided to take a hot, refreshing shower. I take my phone with me so that I can play soft music in the background. I check my messages and see that my mom had sent one the night before. I send her a quick response and proceed to put my playlist on shuffle. I let the water run while I take off my clothes and put them in the laundry basket. The warm water washed away the remaining feelings of tiredness. After shaving and washing my body thoroughly, I started moisturizing it. I don't know how he ended up in my bed, but I'm not complaining. I take a paracetamol and wash it down with some water from the sink. The fluffy towel is tightly wrapped around my body as I step out to my bedroom. Christian is still sleeping and has now taken over my bed completely. Every limb is now pointing at one of the bed's corner, reminding me of a starfish. I smile at him as I quietly walk over to my closet to try and find something to wear.

"Good morning." Christian groaned. The sound of his voice startled me causing me to whip around towards the sound. Christian is staring at me with big eyes. The gray in his eyes becoming a little bit darker. I look down to see my towel on the floor which means that I'm standing completely naked in front of him. _What should I do?_ My heart beats faster and I feel a blush spreading throughout my body. _The towel!_ I think to myself while I dive down after my towel and press it hard against my body. There is a loaded silence between us where we only stare at each other. In the periphery of my vision I think I see something sticking up through the covers, and when I look down I can see a slight elevation on the covers. _Is he turned on right now?_ I bite my lip nervously, I would lie if I said that the thought of him being turned on didn't make me excited. He looks down and looks at his tumescence with wonder and then looks at me again.

 _Earn Enough for Us_ by XTC is playing faintly in the background. I press my lips together, trying to contain my laughter.

"I guess that we are even." I say to him, laughing a little. I turn to my closet, grab the first thing in sight and go back straight to the bathroom. I quickly change to the blue dress I grabbed and walk out again. Christian is sitting on top of my bed with his jeans on looking down at the floor with a smirk. He looks up as I walk into the room.

"How are you feeling?" he asks me, watching me closely. I have a slight headache but otherwise, I'm good.

"Better than I deserve," I answer him. "Uhm... Did we...?" I ask him. I suspect that we didn't but it would be nice to get it confirmed.

"Have sex?" he says with a smirk. I nod my head. He really seems to be enjoying this. Bastard!

"No, we didn't," he answers. "We just slept together in the same bed." I feel my body sag in relief. I would like to remember my first time.

"What are you doing today?" he asks me.

"I have to study and then I'm going to work." he looked a little disappointed.

"Do you want help?" Is he serious?

"What could you help me with? Do you know anything about English literature or economics?" Wait... He could help with the economics.

"Are you serious?" he asks laughing at me. "Do you want my help or not?"

"Okay, fine. I would appreciate your help with the economics." I sigh but inside I'm doing my happy dance. He wants to spend time with me!

I walk out of my bedroom to the kitchen to start making breakfast. There's a note from Jose saying that he went home with Gavin last night and that he hoped that we both had a good night. I roll my eyes I start making pancakes and coffee for everyone. Christian sits down by the kitchen isle watching closely every movement I make.

"Do you want help?" he asks.

"You could set the table," I answer him. He asks me where all things are and after I tell him, he does it willingly.

"What is it that smells so good?" Elliot says as he sits down next to his brother.

"Ana's pancakes." Christians answer him.

Kate barges into the room smelling the air like a mad dog. I knew that she liked my pancakes, but this getting a little bit extreme. Christian, Elliot and I watch her like she was crazy.

"You all look at me now like I'm crazy but wait until you taste her pancakes. They're to die for." she says to Christian and Elliot while shrugging. I laugh at her.

After I've cooked enough pancakes to feed a small town in Africa I put them down on the table. Kate eagerly takes a few pancakes and starts to eat immediately. The guys follow suit while praising my cooking skills. The table is quiet as we eat, It is isn't a loaded or awkward silence, it just feels natural. Kate keeps looking at me as she is searching for something new about me.

"So, did you guys do it?" Kate asks while looking at me meaningly.

Christian chokes on the pancakes he's eating, not really prepared for Kate's frankness. Elliot and I laugh at Christians reaction, while Kate looks smug. Only she would ask something like that in front of the person that it is about, but that's just her wonderfully annoying personality.

"No, we didn't." I answer her. I take a small bite of my bite of my food. "Did you?" I ask Kate and Elliot with one of my eyebrows arched.

"Yes, we did... More than once." she says proudly. She continues eating her pancakes as if nothing had been said. "I enjoyed it very much. Did you?" she asked Elliot.

"Eh, yeah." Elliot stammered while he looked at her with wonder like he never had met someone like her before, which he most likely had not. If there is anything to know about Kate is that she is very verbal and candid.

"Of course you did." she answers him. "Do you have any plans for today?" she asks us.

"Study and work. Christian offered to help me study for my economics exam." I tell her.

"You did what?!" Elliot asks his brother surprised. If a look could kill, then Elliot would've been ash by now.

"I do have some knowledge about the subject," Christian looked at his brother meaningly. "and I have to repay Ana somehow for breaking her wrist..." _Okay, that's good to know,_ I thought to myself. _He isn't interested._ I start to gather all the plates to take them back to the kitchen. Kate helps me take all the dishes back to the kitchen. I have to admit that the fact that he's not interested does hurt my ego a bit, but I'll survive.

The boys come in with the rest of dishes and soon we're all done. I go back to my room and grab everything I need before walking out to the living room where Christian is waiting seemingly ready to go. After saying goodbye to Elliot and Kate, we walk out of the apartment. I have no idea where we're going. The only thing I know is that I don't want to be in the apartment while Kate and Elliot do it again.

"What is that?" Christian says with disgust in his voice.

"My car, Wanda." I say to him. "Isn't she a beauty?"

"It's a deathtrap. We're not going anywhere in that."

"She's perfect. She has taken me where I need to go for years. And don't diss my car she's probably your car's great-grandmother."

"We're taking my car, no discussion." he says in a commanding tone. Who does he think he is?

"No, Wanda is fine." I stand my ground.

"Please, Ana. I don't want us to die."

"Don't be ridiculous we won't die."

"Please." he pleads and there is something in his eyes that makes me surrender. I sigh and nod at him.

"Fine."

We walk over to a sleek black car that screams money and power. It isn't the same car that he drove me to the hospital in, but it is very similar to that car. It seems to be an upgraded version. The seats are in a soft beige colored leather that are very comfortable to sit on. Other than that, it seems like a waste of money in my opinion.

"Where are we going?" he asks me.

"I don't know."

He starts the car and we start driving aimlessly through the damp streets. Laura Welsh's song _Undiscovered_ is playing through the speakers. The confined space is filled with air that is buzzing with electricity. I wonder if he feels it to or if it's just me. My breath hitches a bit from the sexual tension. He continues to drive and parks before the Heathman Hotel. I look at him confused, what are we doing here?

"We need a quiet place to study, I have a room here." he says.

"Why are you living at the Heathman Hotel?" I ask him.

"I'm here to oversee the agricultural project that I sponsor on the university." he answers. That explains a lot, but why is Elliot here then. I decide not to ask him.

The elevator ride was an exercise for me to practice my ability to restrain myself from doing things that I really want to do. For example, I really want to kiss him because I wonder how his lips would feel against mine. I'm curious if he tastes as delicious as he smells or how his hair feels when I run my fingers through it. I would like to know what his reaction would be if I did it. Would he kiss me back and be as into it as I would be or would he try to push me away again. What would be the consequences if we did kiss. Would it be awkward afterwards or would it be just fine? I can feel Christian watching me closely but I'm just watching ahead, I don't think that my self-control is strong enough to look at him and not attack him with my lips. _He's not interested, Steele. Get your shit together._

The elevator doors open as I ponder on all the different scenarios that could happen. I practically run out of the elevator and out to the hallway. Christian walks to a door with a shiny gold 502 written to it and opens it slowly. Like he doesn't really know if he wants me to come in or not. I walk in and I'm met with a big room furnished with what looks like expensive furniture. Everything is very neat and clean, except the couch that is bombarded with clothes. Christians follows my gaze and mutters Elliot's name like a curse. I can tell that he loves his brother very much even though it seems that Elliot drives him crazy most of the time.

I take my bag and sit down at the table, spreading out all my books on the table. He sits down beside me and we start practicing immediately. He is actually helpful. He explains and talks about economics as if were just as obvious as that rain falls from the sky or that water boils when it's hot. He is very patient with me and helps me, apply even the simplest of theories in the real world. I don't think that I've ever understood the subject as well as I do now. It is actually fun. Things start to go downhill when he tries to help me study English Literature, though. It turns out that Christian Grey isn't so good at analyzing literature, it only makes him frustrated.

"Why do you like literature so much?" he asks me.

"I don't know, I like how I can transport myself to the time that the characters are in and how they let me into their heads. It's a way to not only understand the writer, and their view of the world but how the people at the time thought and what their values were." I say "Why do you like economics so much?"

"It's logical and it's what makes the world turn." he answers simply.

I stand up and start to gather all my things as I need to get home and change for work. He looks a little bit disappointed as we walk out of the room and into the elevator. The sexual tension from before has now multiplied is harder than ever to keep my hands to myself. I sneak a peek at him to see if he feels the same, but I'm surprised with a low growl and then he kisses me hard. He takes my hands and presses them against the elevator wall. He let's go of my hands while looking at me with pleading eyes. "Please don't touch my chest or back." I let my fingers run through his hair, and it is as soft as I imagined. He tastes like Christian. This is one of the most exhilarating experiences of my life. My heart is racing and it feels like my blood has been switched out with a fire that is quickly spreading, like a wildfire. The doors open suddenly revealing the lobby, we separate as quickly as humanly possible.

"What is with elevators?" he mutters.

"I don't know." I respond.

The drive back to my apartment is pleasant. I sing along to the few songs that I actually know. He smiles and laughs when I serenade him with _Pour Some Sugar on Me_ by Def Leppard as a joke. We walk slowly to my apartment. What does the kiss mean? I thought that he wasn't interested? Maybe his looking for a "friends with benefits" kind of deal? I open the apartment to see Elliot naked on top of Kate on our couch. I'm so shocked that I just stand there staring at them. Christian, on the other hand, is screaming at Elliot to put some clothes on. Kate is so red when she covers herself up one of the couch pillows that I start to laugh hysterically. I've never seen Kate embarrassed before, she's so red that her skin reminds me of a tomato. She vanishes quickly to her room leaving Elliot in his naked glory. I can't help but look down at his parts... And it looks huge. He bends down to pick up his jeans and he rapidly puts on his pants. Looking a little bit embarrassed himself.

"So, you're here..." he starts.

"Yes, Anastasia happens to live here as well." Christian answers him swiftly. "We're going... NOW." he tells his brother.

"Chill, Bro. It's just a little nudity. I'm sure Ana has seen a dick before." _Uhm, not really Elliot, you're the first that I've seen in real life. "_ I'm just going to get dressed and then we can go." Elliot says while walking to Kate's room calmly. Leaving me and Christian alone.

"It seems to be something in the air today." I say to him, laughing at him recalling our own little accident. He mutters something to himself.

Elliot and Kate walk out of her room. Elliot gives her a big, wet kiss while saying "Laters, baby."

"Bye, Elliot." Kate says to him dreamingly.

"Bye, Elliot thanks for the show." I say to him while he gives me a big hug.

He laughs "Goodbye, Ana."

He walks out of the apartment. Christian and I look at each other. What the hell are we supposed to do know? We can't hug because of his touch issue but a handshake seems way too formal. We just awkwardly stand there staring at each other.

"Bye, Christian. Thanks for the help." I wave my hand to him. He walks over and leans down to my ear. "Laters, Baby." he whispers in my ear.

He walks out and closes the door behind him. Kate and I look at each other with broad smiles. She comes over and hugs me tight. She seems really happy.

"Did you do it?!" she asks me, eagerly waiting for my answer.

"No, we didn't." I tell her.

"Oh, come on Steele. Something must've happened between you two. You can practically see the tension."

"We kissed once."

"Yes! Look at us getting loved up with brothers." she squeals.

I roll my eyes at her. "You seem to like Elliot... A lot." I say to Kate.

"Yes, I do. We're seeing each other soon." she says.

"I'm glad." I tell her.

"Are you seeing Christian soon?" she asks.

"I don't know." I answer as I go to my room to change into a work appropriate outfit. As soon as I'm done I go out to my car and start driving to work while thinking about the enigma that seems to be Christian Grey.


	6. Chapter 6 - The Secret

I'm reading _Wuthering Heights_ by Emily Brontë and writing down a few notes for my final in literature. The characters in the novel, especially Heathcliff, are so complex. Heathcliff with his hunger for revenge makes the perfect example. He is often seen as the romantic hero of the story. That his menacing behavior only is there to mask his true passionate heart, but I'm not sure that I would fully agree on that. Heathcliff points out himself, more than once, that the abuse he gives Isabella is sadistic, and I agree with his statement. Joyce Carol Oates critique on the book put my exact thoughts into words. Charlotte Brontë does the same thing to the reader, but the abuse comes from the countless times we are shocked by the violence Heathcilff commits and still, masochistically, think of him as the hero of the story.

Sometimes I like to think myself as the main character in the story, to really get the feel for the character. For example, how would I feel if I was Catherine? If I was torn between my true feelings for Heathcliff or my higher social ambitions. In all honesty I don't know what I would've done. It is a difficult situation, especially for a woman in the 1800's. But, nevertheless, it is something worth thinking about - should you choose the person that you love or the person that could make your life comfortable? I don't mean it in a gold-digger kind of way, because I really don't care if my partner has money or not because I intend to make my own, but in a way that if you had to choose between an exciting and amorous kind of love or a love based on content and satisfaction, which one would you choose? I have no clue.

I put on the song _Begging_ by Madcon and start to dance around in my room like I didn't have a care in the world. Everything is going to be alright, I'm going to be one of the lucky ones to have a job after college! Kate walks in to my room and starts to dance with me while asking me what happened. I tell her happily and she runs over to me and gives me a big bear hug. The phone rings again, abruptly stoping the music. A arrangement of letters that make the name Christian Grey appears on the phone screen. Kate looks at me excitedly.

"Hello." I say a little bit nervous.

"What are you doing tonight?" he asks sounding very serious and determined.

"I have to study for finals, but other than that nothing."

"Good, I'll pick you up at seven." he says decidedly. He almost sounds short, like he's ordering me to do something and expecting me to do it. My first instinct is to tell him to not order me around and then a little voice in my head tells me to focus on finals, they're less than three days away.

"Uhm, I should stay at home and study. Finals are this Thursday." I say to him slowly. I bite my lip, _You're making the right decision_ , my subconscious tells me. I've already decided before that whatever happens with Christian happens. I want to just live in the moment and see where this goes, but as for now I really need to focus on finals.

Kate walks over takes my phone right of my hands and runs away to the living room before I even know what happened. She talks rapidly and hushed so that I struggle to hear what she says to him, while I follow her to where she is. When I catch up with her she is already thanking him and saying that he will see her later. What the hell has she done now? She gives me back my phone with a mischievous smile. I give her an uncertain look. "What have you done?" I ask her.

"You will thank me someday." she says simply to me and sashays away.

"Hello?" I ask carefully.

"Kate is very..." he says slowly looking for the right word to describe her.

"Annoying." I finish for him.

"Unusual."

"What did she say to you?"

"That we would proceed with my plans, and that you could bring your books and we could study together, although she thought that you wouldn't need it because apparently you've studied all day. So, I'm picking you up at seven."

"Do I have any say on this?" I ask subdued.

"Not really." Christian says. "I thought that we could go to Seattle." he says simply, like he is shrugging while saying it. How long is he expecting us to be gone? The trip to Seattle by car is at least two hours, it's four hours just the ride there and back. So... This should be interesting. "Don't worry, you'll be home by bedtime." he continues quickly hearing my uncertainty.

"Okay. What are we going to do in Seattle?" I ask.

"I thought that we could eat dinner at my place," he says "that way we can talk... Or study, without any disturbances." he continues nervously. I wonder what it is he wants to say that is so secret that he can't risk anyone hearing about it. _Or maybe he wants to just sleep with you, it is easy access to a bed at his place_ , I think to myself.

"Well, I guess that I'll see you later." I say to him and hang up after that I heard him say goodbye. I just stand in the middle of the living room, holding my cellphone, wondering what happened. _I guess that you're going to meet Christian Grey for dinner tonight..._ , I think to myself. Kate walks out slowly, while looking around to see if the coast is clear. She watches me closely, trying to see if I'm mad or if I'm happy. Her whole demeanor radiates nervousness.

"I'm not mad, Kate." I say to her even though inside I'm a little bit irritated that she decided for me.

"Good! You know, you'll thank me someday." she says.

Kate has helped me remove every unwanted hair on my body. I almost feel like a very smooth naked mole rat. Charlie XCX's song _Superlove_ plays in the background while she helps me get ready for the dinner. I start to get more and more excited for the dinner. She helps me pick out an appropriate outfit while we talk.

"So, do you think that you'll sleep with him?" she asks while looking at me intently.

Would I sleep with him if the opportunity arose? _Absolutely._ He is the first man that has ever made me feel anything remotely sexual, and I doubt that I would regret anything. I want to see what it is that everybody is talking about. I'm ready to lose my virginity.

"I guess, it all depends on the moment." I say to her, which is true.

"This is so exciting. Do you know how long Jose and I have waited for you to do it?! We have guessed when and with whom, and it looks like Jose nailed it."

"I don't get why my sex-life is so interesting? Wait, what did you guys guess?"

"I guessed that you would lose it with someone that you'd already knew, in a few years and he guessed that you'd lose it right about know with someone that you didn't know."

"So, you basically see me as a saint and Jose sees me like an undercover slut?" I ask her confused.

"Yeah, basically." she shrugs while looking through my wardrobe She turn around looking at me. "And there is nothing wrong with being a slut. Every girl should be able to sleep with whomever she wants, whenever she wants without being judged, plus it's way more fun to switch it up." she winks at me.

"You know what I mean." I say to her while rolling my eyes. Kate sighs, she hates when I roll my eyes at her. She hands me a super tight purple dress she bought me a few weeks ago. Is she really serious how am I going to be comfortable in that thing? I'm supposed to eat, sit... And breath.

"I know what your thinking but dresses like these aren't made for comfort." she says to me.

"Then why make it all?"

"Because it's sexy. It will show of your curves and enhance your brown hair."

"No, I won't wear it." I say to her determinedly while walking over to my closet choosing an outfit myself. I choose my favorite blue high waisted jeans with a cream shirt and a brown leather jacket. I feel good in this outfit and it's comfortable and as Kate always says "you have to love your outfit otherwise it wont work.". Kate looks at me like I've completely lost my mind but I'm keeping my clothes casual because this isn't a date... I think. Either way, this is me. Take it or leave it.

I walk to my bedroom and brush through my hair letting it fall down my shoulders in natural waves. I put on some mascara and some chapstick. Looking myself in the mirror I'm not mad at what I see. My reflection shows an average girl. None of my features are prominent or captivating, except for my blue eyes which according to my mother I inherited from my dead father. Ray also has them, which makes me happy because it makes me somehow feel more connected to him. I know it's stupid. That reminds me I should call Ray. I walk out to my room to find Kate sitting on my bed, looking down at er phone.

"Do you mind if Elliot comes over while you're away?" she asks. The date they went on the other day went well and they've been texting none stop ever since. I'm glad that Kate finally found someone that interests her more than for the moment. She deserves to find someone that makes her happy.

"Sure, but isn't he in Seattle?" I ask her.

"Yeah, but he is on his way with Christian now." I nod.

06.20 PM says the clock on my nightstand. I pack a handbag with all the essentials that I need and my books just in case. Maybe I can study on my way home, every minute I can get is valuable. Thursday can't come soon enough so I just can be done with it, then I don't need to think about it anymore. I look around my room looking for something that I have forgotten, but when I don't find anything I walk out to the living room and hang out with Kate for a while. We quiz each other for our English final that we have together.

The door rings announcing the arrival of Christian and Elliot. I look at the clock on the wall and see that it's 06.55 PM. It seems like we can add punctual to the list of qualities that Christian has. The list know reads - control freak, philanthropic and has haphephobia. I'm sure that the list will soon be extended.

Kate opens the door while I stand up to gather my things. I hear them greet one another by the door. I walk towards the door seeing Christian in his dark blue jeans, a grey T-shirt and a black leather jacket. He looks like good, really good. I feel his eyes scanning what I have on, and for a moment I'm afraid that what I have on is way to casual. Maybe I should go change into something more formfitting like Kate said? _You're just going to his place, Ana. There's no need to be fancy_ , I say to myself.

"Are you ready?" he asks me smiling shyly. Elliot watches him closely. He looks astonished at his brother but smiling brightly. He walks into the apartment and stands beside Kate, putting his arm around her and bringing her closely to his body. I give Kate a quick glance and see that she's beaming.

"Sure." I say to him trying to sound really confident to try to hied the fact that I'm a little nervous.

We say our quick goodbyes to the happy couple and walk out his car. There is a man waiting by the car. He has a buzzcut and stands very straight, just like Ray does. That tells me that he's been in the military. He has broad shoulders and even through his black suit you can see that the man is in good shape and that he could possibly be lethal. He reminds me so much of Ray that I instantly feel safe. Christian seems to be at ease by the fact that a stranger is waiting by his car, which leads me to believe that the stranger isn't a stranger at all. Who is he?

"Taylor, this is Miss Steele. Ana, this is Taylor my personal security." Christian introduces us.

"Nice to meet you, Miss Steele." Taylor says. His voice is throaty and masculine.

"Likewise, Taylor." I say to him. He nods curtly and then proceeds to sit down on the drivers seat. Is he supposed to drive us all the way to Seattle?

Christian opens the backseat door for me with a warm smile.

"Good evening, Miss Steele." he says.

"Mr. Grey." I respond to him with a smirk. "How was your day?" I ask him. He seems a bit taken aback by it. Like he wasn't expecting me to ask.

"It was long." he says.

"What did you do?"

"I worked all day." he answers simply. "How was yours?" he asks.

"I went to class and studied all day." I say to him.

"Are you nervous for finals?"

"Yes, I really want to do well." I say to him honestly. He caresses my knuckles softly and rhythmically with his thumb, I can feel my heart skip a beat and how my blood slowly is replaced by lava that slowly and surely warms up my whole entire body. In that instant I know that I like him. I know that it's stupid, and that I should feel anything for him this soon but I can't help it.

"I'm sure that you'll be fine." he says sounding sure of himself. Taylor is driving in a part of the city that I haven't really been in before. It's densely built and the majority of the buildings are tall. We are nowhere near the freeway. Has Taylor got lost? The car stops in front of a very high building. I scrunch my face in confusion.

"Are you ready?" he asks.

"For what?" I ask him bewildered. He ignores my question and opens the door, takes my hand and leads me into the building. Apparently the elevator is out of function, so we have to take the stairs. It's a 15 story-building and we have to get to the roof because a surprise is waiting. I'm glad that I'm wearing flats and jeans instead of that tight dress and heels that Kate suggested. Christian walks ahead of me giving me a chance to observe his back. He has taken of his leather jacket, and I can see through his thin shirt that he has a well muscled back. Every movement makes a area of his back to tense and relax, making a captivating show for me to watch. Who would've thought that a simple back can be so attractive.

At last, we reach the roof, and I'm met with a helicopter. On it's side there are blue letters that read Grey Enterprises Holdings Inc. Are we really going on that thing? No one is up here with us, not even Taylor. Who's supposed to fly it?

"Let's go." He says taking my hand and leading me to it. When go near it I notice that it's bigger than I first thought, at least seven people can easily fit in there. He opens the door en motions for me to sit down on the cockpit. "Don't touch anything." he commands.

"Are we going to fly to Seattle?" I ask Christian dumbfounded and with a big smile. I've always wanted to fly a helicopter. I'm so exited.

"Yes, it's the quickest way to get to Seattle." he shrugs. I sit down at my assigned seat. The air inside smells a bit stuffy and has a faint smell of new car. Christian comes really close to me and starts to tightly strap me into the seat so that I can barely move. He is so close that I can see the little wrinkle between his eyebrows that he seems to get when he's focused on his task. I can smell his cologne mixed with his personal smell, it's intoxicating. He has a slight pout, that makes me want to lean down and kiss him. When he looks up he is laughing to himself, like his laughing at an inside joke.

"Now you can't run. You're stuck." he whispers. "Don't forget to breath." he reminds me quietly. He looks at me for a while, and caresses my cheek lightly. His fingers feel cool against my overheated skin. He leans down and kisses me chastely.

"What was that for?" I ask him.

"For taking chances." he says. He walks around to the other side of the helicopter and sits where all the controllers are. He puts on a pair of headphones and starts talking to someone on the other side.

"Isn't the pilot supposed to sit there?" I ask him confused. I look around the roof again to see if someone qualified is nearby.

"I'm going to fly it." He says confidently. "I've been certified for years and I'm an excellent flyer. Do you trust me?" I nod.

He asks me to put on a pair of headphones that are in front of me. I put them on and immediately hear the unmistakable sound of the rotor blades starting to turn. I can't help the big smile I have plastered on my face. Portland disappears under us as we fly higher and higher. The sky is pitch black and I don't understand how he can fly in the right direction.

He tells me that his building has a helicopter pad. The faint light from instrument panel makes me able to see his profile. He has a straight nose and a strong jaw, one that I would like to leave soft kisses on.

"When it's dark I have to relay on the equipment." he says, making me stop thinking indecent thoughts.

"How will long will it take to get there?" I ask him breathlessly. The anticipation of what is going to happen when we arrive is making me nervous and giddy. I*m really turned on and borderline desperate.

"A little less than an hour." he answers. _That explains why Elliot arrived so shortly after he asked Kate if he could come over._ But a little less than hour is not bad, of course you fly to Portland if you have opportunity.

Should I tell him that I'm a virgin if we get to that point? I feel a lump in my throat and how the muscles in my stomach tighten. I think I should, he deserves to know and I owe it to myself.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes." I press out through the lump.

As we descend to his penthouse I start to feel more anxious and I can feel the adrenaline rushing through my body. I can't help but feel as if he is going to find something wrong with me and demand that I get out his apartment. I start to regret the decision to not listen to Kate, I wished that I had something sexy on, that could boost my confidence. What if he doesn't want to do it? Or if he is gay like everyone suspects? That would be humiliating.

"You know that you don't need to do anything that you don't want to do?" His voice sounded sincere and gentle, like he could see my nervousness and tried to calm me down.

I just nod, I doubt that I can press any words out right now. The elevator doors open revealing a space that seems cold and impersonal. The hall is all in white, with a dark brown table with a very big bouquet with white flowers. There's paintings everywhere. They resemble paintings in his office, they're also abstract. Christian continues to walk down the hall to an enormous living room with very high ceiling. The wall that is furthest away is completely made of glass and has a balcony with a view over Seattle.

The U-shaped sofa can easily fit 10 persons. His house is almost the same as his office. Facing the sofa there is in modern fireplace in a shiny metal. When I turned around I see a big table with 16 chairs and besides that there is a big piano. _It seems like I was right when I guess they could play the piano._

"Do you want something to drink?" He asks. "I'm going to have a glass of wine do you want one?"

"Yes, please." I answer him in low voice.

He takes off his leather jacket, puts it over a chair and goes to fetch the wine. I can feel my heart beating rapidly in my chest. It isn't until now that I realize that he is rich as a troll. What the hell am I even doing here? _You know why, you want to sleep with him._

He gives me the glass of wine and I bring it to my lips and start to sip on the chilled white wine. I'm hoping that the alcohol will serve as liquid courage.

"I've never seen you so pale or quiet, you're not even blushing. Are you hungry?"

"Not really." I answer him honestly, I really don't think that I could eat anything at this point.

He motions for me to sit at the table, where I see there's a document waiting for me. When I sit down at the table I get a feeling that I am just like test do for Ville when she is in the house of the well-known I like to prevent. Somehow the thought is comforting.

"It's a nondisclosure agreement." He looks a little bit embarrassed when you say that. " my lawyer insists."

"What does that even mean?"

"It means did you can talk about us to anyone."

I looked at him irritatedly. Does he really think that I would talk about us to anyone? I'm not that kind of girl. _He doesn't know that Steele,_ I calm myself. I take the pen and sign without even looking at the paper.

"Anastasia, don't you know that you never sign anything that you haven't read first?!." He says reproachful

" I would never talk about us with anyone. Not even Kate. But if it means this much to you or your lawyer then I'll sign."

He thinks about what I said for moment and then nods. He takes a deep breath and proceeds to stand up and walk around back-and-forth rapidly. When he finally stops, he runs his fingers through his hair and look at me pleadingly. He sits down calmly, let's his fingers intertwined with each other and takes a deep breath. I can imagine him in the board room making business, he is in his CEO mode.

"Have you ever heard of BDSM?" Christian asks while looking at me straight in the eyes.

"Not really." I say to him. "I've heard of it before, I'm not really sure what it entails." I continue.

"Maybe I just should take you to my playroom." Christian says more to himself. "I'll show you."

He stands up again but this time he asks me to follow him. I'm so confused, what has BDSM in common his Xbox? It takes my hand, it feels kind of crabby and warm. We walk up a pair of stairs. There's a white corridor with several doors but Christian walks to the second one. He lets go of my hand and puts his hand at the door handle.

"You know that you could leave at any time." he says to me. "I can always have someone fly you back."

"Just open the door." I say to him. He backs away and lets me see inside a red room, that takes me back to the Middle Ages.

 _What have I gotten myself into?_


	7. Chapter 7 - The Game

I can't do anything else but stare at the red room that looks like a torture chamber. The lighting is faint, as if the room just glowed by itself, giving it somehow an inviting and mysterious look. My brain is telling me to run, that only sociopaths would have this type of playroom, but the other side of me wants to hear why he has this in his apartment. _Who cares about the why?_ , my subconscious screams at me. I take a few careful steps and walk into the room.

The first thing I notice is the smell: it smells like leather, wood and polish that smells faintly of lemons. The walls and the ceiling are painted blood red, that together with the glow made it seem like the room was alive. Facing me there is a big cross, made from a dark wood, and every corner has a kind of shackle made out of leather. Above that there is a big grid, where several ropes and other things hangs that seemed to be used to restrain a person. By the left side of the door there was a set of different whips, I think. Some of them reminded me of the ones one would use on a horse, while some of them I have never seen in my life. On the right side of the door there was a big chest of drawers made from the same dark wood that the cross. The furniture looked old, like it belonged to a museum, but instead it seemed to store, what I assume are various different tools, that a person into BDSM needs to have. In one of the corners of the room there is a bench, and along side it there was an assortment of different canes, all different sizes and widths. On the other side of the room there is an exquisite table with a chair on either side. The thing that takes up the most space though, is the king size bed that stands in the middle of the room. The sheets glisten slightly under the lights making me think that the sheets are made of silk or a material similar to that.

I turn around and see Christian watching me closely. He has an unreadable expression. I take a look at the room again, and realize that I don't have a problem with this at all. Who am I to judge, what he chooses to do with a willing partner on his free time. It's none of my business, but I'm just curious to why or how he became involved with this. I walk out the room and down the stairs, straight to the dinning table where I left my glass of wine. The chilled wine is now slightly warm but I don't care anymore, I gulp down the wine hoping that the alcohol in it will calm my nerves. I hear Christians steps behind me.

"Are you going to leave?" Christian asks. " I can arrange for someone to come pick you up and fly you back home." he continues slowly. I hesitantly shake my head, we're going to talk. I see a small wine cooler in the kitchen and decide that we are going to need a whole bottle. I take one, that already was opened and walk back to table were Christian is standing confounded. I take a seat on the chair that I sat on before, I notice that it is very comfortable. _Good because we're going to be here a while,_ I think to myself.

"Do people use those things on you or you on them?" I ask him calmly while watching him closely. At first he looks a bit taken aback by the question or maybe it's my tone, but he quickly composes himself and sits down at the table. This reminds me of the interview, the only difference is that we're not recording the conversation and the questions are now completely my own.

"I to them." he says slowly while thinking about how to elaborate his answer. "I do this to willing women." I nod my head slowly while taking a big gulp of wine.

"What am I doing here if you have a willing woman at your disposal?" I ask him.

"Because I really want to do it with you." he says. "You're not like anyone I've ever met before."

"I see." I puff. _Why?,_ I think to myself. I look down to the table and feel the surface of the table. It feels smooth to the touch. "Are you a sadist?" I ask him while looking at him straight in the eye. If he is there isn't even a slight chance of anything happening between us...

"I'm a dominant." His gaze is smoldering grey and intensive. _That isn't really the answer I'm looking for,_ he is avoiding the question, my subconscious whispers.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"That I want you to willingly submit, under any circumstances, to me." I look at him trying to hold on to my laughter. _Oh no he seems to be serious about this._

"Why would I do that?"

"To satisfy me." he says simply like it's the most obvious answer in the world. His head is turned a little bit to the side watching my reaction, which is shock. From where I'm sitting it seems that I get the bad end of the agreement and I don't think that I could handle him telling me what to do all the time. "To put it simply I want you to want to satisfy me."

"And how would that work?" I ask him. He looks at me like I have missed a very important part of the whole conversation, and I haven't. I get the satisfaction part, even though I'm inexperienced I'm not clueless, is the whole torture chamber situation that has me confused. BDSM by itself isn't wrong, I'm not judging him on his sexual preference, but I don't want it to be my first time, and I realize that even though I trust him, I don't trust him enough for me to feel comfortable with doing that kind of stuff with him.

"I have a set of rules, that I want you to follow. If you follow them to my liking, then you'll be rewarded. If you don't I will punish you." he explains. I nod my head slowly and drink more wine. I pour some more in my glass, Christian hasn't even touched his glass. _I wonder if I can take his when the bottle is empty._

"Okay, What do I get out of all of this?"

"You get me."

The room becomes silent. I can feel my head becoming a little bit heavier, I push the glass aside, I don't want to get drunk tonight. What do I say to him? _Thanks I'm flattered but I don't want my first time to be in the torture chamber._ Should I even tell him that I'm a virgin? The Information seems redundant now that I'm sure but I won't do anything with him... At least not tonight. So, no, I won't tell him. What is our relationship going to be now?

"What happens if I don't want to do this?"

"Then we won't have any kind of relationship." He says.

"Why?"

"Because it's the only kind of relationship that I can maintain."

"Why?" I ask him again, this really doesn't make any sense. He seems to have a functioning relationship with his brother and his family.

"It's just the way I am." he just shrugs.

"But tell me why." I say to him slowly. And then it hits me, something must've happened. The no touching thing, the BDSM, the fact that he is so closed of - something happened. "What happened to you?"

"Why are people how do they are? That's a hard question answer. Why do some people like cheese and why so some hate it? Do you like cheese? Mrs. Jones - my house keeper - has arranged some supper for us." _He is changing the conversation to cheese? Should I persist? I don't know him that well. Maybe he'll talk if he gets drunk,_ I think to myself. I'll let this one slide.

"Yeah, why not? I would like to like some cheese." he sighs with relief, drinks a bit of his wine and goes to refrigerator to get the cheeses. The plate has a few cheeses, crackers and grapes. I take a few grapes and put them in my mouth and start to chew. This man really is a mystery.

"Tell me what you're thinking." he whispers sounding unsure.

"Honestly?" I asked him.

"Yes." He says firmly.

"Well, honestly, I think that sex is completely of the table right now. And it isn't because of the BDSM thing, I don't judge you or despise you for doing that as long you are doing it with a willing partner, it isn't any of my business. I won't be in that kind of relationship with you because I don't know you, and I assume that this kind relationship, like any other really is based on trust, and quite frankly I don't trust you enough for me to feel comfortable in starting this kind of relationship with you right now." I say to him rapidly.

"What do you want to know about me?" he asks me.

A thought springs into my brain. We could make a game out of this, like a combination of _truth or dare_ and _never have I ever_. Kate and I used to play this in the beginning, when we didn't know each other. _I hope this works._

"Let's play a game. We get to ask anything to one another but if one of us don't want to answer we just say pass. Let's say you ask me something and I don't want to answer I can say pass and then you pick a penalty for me to do. Like, I don't know, drink a whole glass of water or scream something out of the balcony." I say to him while smiling a bit. He looks a bit confused, but agrees to it. I stand up, take the wine glasses and walk to the ginormous sofa he has, but for some reason instead on sitting on the couch I sit on the floor and use the sofa as my backrest. He looks down at me with a small smile.

"Isn't the sofa good enough for you?" he asks.

"Yes, but I just like sitting on the floor." he laughs a bit and sits beside me. "Do you want to start?" he asks me. I nod eagerly. He looks tense and nervous he doesn't know what to expect. I decide to start easy, and progressively make the questions harder.

"What is your full name?"

"Christian Trevelyan Grey." he says looking a bit more relaxed. "What's yours?"

"Anastasia Rose Steele." I answer him. "What's your favorite color?"

"Blue." he says rapidly. "What's yours?"

"Grey." I answer him swiftly and without thinking. It is true I've always loved the color grey, according to my mom it represents wisdom and maturity. People always told me that it is a boring color, but it always appealed to me. "You should start making your own questions instead of just stealing mine, Mr. Grey." I chastise him with a smile. "What is the last the last song that you last listed to?"

"Stop asking good questions then, Miss. Steele." he says while he stands up and walks over to his iPod. " _Sex on Fire_ by Kings of Leon." he says while putting the song on. "Where did you grow up?" he asks.

"Montesano, small town a few hours from here." I answer him, he nods while telling me that his family went fishing there once. Who knows maybe they met my dad when they were fishing on that trip. "How old are you?"

"27" he says, He's so young and already accomplished so much. "What's your favorite book?"

"Tess D'Urberville." I tell him. "Why did you drop out of college?" I ask him, it's something that I've been wondering since the interview.

"I felt like I was waisting my time in college learning something that I already knew. I just wanted to start my business and learn that way. My parents weren't so supportive of that decision but obviously it worked out in the end." he shrugs. It isn't so strange that his parents weren't so supportive of him the beginning, they were afraid that he had nothing to fall back on if his business didn't work out. He, on the other hand seems to be bothered by the fact. "Tell me about your parents." he says.

"My mother lives in Georgia with her new husband. My dad, or rather my stepdad, lives in Montesano." I tell him.

"What happened to your dad?" He asks, I shake my head with a smile. "You'll have to wait for your turn to ask the question." I take a sip of wine, that now is room-temperature but still somehow good. I think about what I want to ask him for a few seconds.

"What do your parents do?" I ask him. "My mother is a pediatrician and my dad is a lawyer." he says. He had a stable upbringing then, at least after his adoption. He looks at me expectingly. "Now answer my question."

"My father died when I was little while he was in the military. I don't remember him, I see Ray as my real dad." I explain to him, he nods understandingly. "What do your siblings do?"

"Elliot has his own business in the carpeting industry and my sister Mia is studying in Paris, she wants to be a chef." Christian smiles a bit when he talks about his family, they're close. "Whats your dad like?"

"He isn't very talkative. He is a carpenter so he's good with his hands, and ex-military which means that he can kick some serious butt." I say smiling. I really miss Ray. "Likes football - especially the European kind - bowling and fishing."

 _It's time to bring up the temperature,_ I think to myself. "Does your family know about your... ehm... sexual preferences?" He looks uncomfortable and he stiffens up again. He takes his wineglass and drinks it slowly, to buy himself some time to think about if he is going to answer or not. "My brother is the only who knows about it..." he says slowly. "and only because he walked into a scene." he laughs embarrassed.

"So, how come that you never had an orgasm?" he asks me looking at me with a grin. I feel my cheeks burn, damn I didn't want him to ask me that question. Should I pass or should I be honest? I sigh when I realize that I can't expect honesty from him if I'm not honest myself. "Pass." I say. He looks at mischievously knowing that I'm now in his mercy. _I wonder what he'll make me do._

 _"_ I want you to kiss me." he says. I move closer towards him, look him in the eyes and give him a quick peck on the lips. He looks at me disappointed, like he was expecting more. I lean closer again, brushing my lips against mine, kneading them slowly with mine. I run my fingers through his hair, he groans a bit. I lean back again and drink a little bit more wine.

"How did you get into BDSM?" I ask him carefully.

He seems to evaluate if I can handle the information he is about to tell me. "My introduction into sex was quite unusual. My mom's friend introduced me to the lifestyle." I can feel my face scrunch up in anger and shock. _That's just wrong._ "How old were you?" I ask him seriously.

"Isn't it my turn to ask?" he says cockily.

"Just answer the question."

"15." he says like there wasn't nothing really wrong with it. Doesn't e realize that what happened to him is abuse? That he was manipulated and used for someone else's entertainment? _I don't think he does..._ Judging by the look on his face I can tell that nothing I say to him will change his mind. My happy mood has now been replaced by anger for the pedophile. The music playing in the background is filling the otherwise tense silence.

"Does your parents now about it?" I ask him quietly.

"Yes." he says while looking somewhat ashamed. So, they now about the sex but what kind of sex. Well, at least his parents are aware of the fact that it has happened. I wonder if he is ashamed because he got caught or for the actual relationship. I look at him, and he looks the lost boy I first saw on that party four years ago. The control freak megalomaniac doesn't know what to do and that scares him. I wish I could say something that could make him feel better, but I don't know what to say. I can't say what I'm really thinking because that would just be throwing fuel at the fire but I can't lie either, and say that I think that it's okay, so I decide to just be quiet. I look down and find that his hands are balled up into tight fists, and by instinct I decide to take his hand. At first nothing happens my hands just lays on top of his, and I stroke his tense knuckles softly. He takes my hand and we just sit there, on the his living room floor watching the dancing flames on his fireplace.

* * *

I wake up in the middle of the night to the sound of a melancholic melody. I look around my surroundings to see a modern room painted in a soft grey. The ceiling is painted in a way that reminds me of the ocean, with blue and white swirls. The sheets feel soft and they smell fresh, like they've been recently laundered. There's a few pieces of furniture made out of wood giving the furniture a more rustic feeling. I stand up to find that I still have all my clothes on except for my shoes, socks and jacket. Silently, I walk towards the music.

Christian is playing beautifully on the grand piano that I saw earlier. I sit down beside him and just watch his hands move across the black and white keys. He finishes the song and then continues to stare at the keys for a while.

"That was beautiful." I say to him softly. He nods, and thanks me for my compliment. His eyes roam my face and land on my lips. I nervously bite my it, which he answers by bending down and kissing me softly on the lips. I feel how one of his hands lands on my neck, pressing my face closer to his and how the other hand lands on my waist. The kisses grow in intensity, making me hot and breathless.

"Stop." I say to him when I take a deep breath.

"What is it?" he asks. "Because if it is the whole 'I don't really know you' thing, I can guarantee that after tonight you know me better than anyone."

He moves me closer to him, and continues to kiss me. _Why is he so good at this?_ My brain is foggy and the only thing I can think about is him. About how his touch feels against my skin, about the heat that he seems to radiate and how addicting his kisses are becoming.

"No." I repeat when I break away again. He looks confused.

"Why?"

"I don't want our first time to be, when you're emotionally drained and tired." I say to him and kiss him on the cheek. "Come its time to go to bed." I stand up and start walking to the place I thought I came from.

"Anastasia, the bedrooms are this way." he says and points to the opposite way.

We walk quietly to the room that I came from, and notice now that one of the walls is made of glass, giving this room an amazing view of the city. _I should've taken my pajamas with me_ , I think to myself. I look around the room to find a discarded shirt sitting on a chair in the corner. I take it and smell it, to make sure that it does't smell bad, and decide that this is going to be my pajamas for the night. Christian observes every move I make.

"is it okay if I borrow this tonight?" I ask him while he nods. I take of my shirt, and put on the his T-shirt on. For some reason I don't feel shy or uncomfortable with him. I fold my clothes neatly and put them on the same chair I took the shirt from, and walk to the bed.

"You aren't making this easy for me." Christian says.

"What do you mean?" He looks at me meaningly, I look down to my bare legs and blush.

"I'm sure that you'll survive."

"Barely." he murmurs.

I lay down, on the side nearest the window, watching the lights of the city that I soon will call home. Christian lays down beside me watching the ceiling.

"What are you doing to me?"

"The same thing you're doing to me." I whisper as I fall asleep.

* * *

Hello everyone,

I haven't really decided if I should have Elena Lincoln's character in my story or not, so let me know what you think!  
Thank you for taking the time to read my story.

I hope you're having a wonderful day/night wherever you are in the world xx


	8. Chapter 8 - The Contract

**The Contract**

I wake up blinded by the morning sun. The sun is shining brightly through Christian's bedroom window, giving me an amazing view of Seattle's skyline. There is nothing I can do but watch captivated the beauty of the city. Behind me I can hear Christian breathing heavily. I turn around to find him spread out, taking over the majority of the bed, but luckily for me this is the biggest bed I've ever slept on so there's plenty of room for the both us. What Christian said the night before has me unsettled. He was molested, but at least his parents are aware of the fact. I hope that she's rotting in prison, for what that woman did. She was his mothers friend, and she abused and had sex with her teenage son. I wonder how his parents found out - did he tell them? That would be the best way for them to find out, to hear it from him directly instead of hearing it from someone else or worse, them walking in on it and have the picture engraved in their minds forever.

Christian was a lot more open and honest with me last night than expected. I'm honored that he trusts me well enough to tell me, or maybe it's the non-disclosure agreement that I signed that compelled him to tell me, either way I appreciate it. There are still some things that confuse me about the conversation we had yesterday, especially when it comes to the BDSM part. He explicably said that if I didn't agree to be his submissive that we wouldn't have a relationship at all because "Because it's the only kind of relationship that I can maintain.". Doesn't he have any friends... At all?

Another thing that makes me confused is the fact that he has said more than once, that I'm "different". What does that even mean? I really don't know. The way he insists to have an exclusively sexual relationship tells me that I'm not so special as he says, right? One more thing that doesn't add up is the fact that I slept over... in his bed. I guess it makes sense that I would spend the night here. I did fall asleep by the couch last night, and it had taken us, or rather me, hours to get home.

I stand up and walk around the room while stretching my muscles. I pick up my clothes and decide to put them on. His bedroom has three doors, one to the left, on to the right and one right in front of me. I know that the room standing right in front of me is the door to the rest of the penthouse, so hopefully one of the two rooms is a bathroom where I can change. I decide to go to the right and I'm greeted with a room filled with clothes. Racks and shelves full of suits, shirts, shoes and other articles of clothing. Does he really need all those clothes? It seems a bit excessive. I turn around and walk to the only door left. The bathroom is huge, bigger than my bedroom, and luxurious. The light seem to go on automatically when someone is in the room, which is unexpected and makes me stand there confused for a dew seconds until I registered how the light works. Every surface is spotless and in a color scheme of cremes and white with the only signs of anybody actually using it being the toothbrush and toothpaste on the counter.

As I put on my clothes, I notice that I'm starting to get hungry. I'm in the mood for pancakes and bacon, maybe some fruit. I make eye contact with my reflection and see that my hair has decided to become a birds nest but the only thing I find while looking around for something to brush my hair with is a comb. I sigh and try to comb my hair back to normal. After spending at least five minutes and achieving next to nothing. I try to walk quietly across the bedroom to go to the kitchen and start preparing breakfast.

Fortunately his kitchen has all the ingredients necessary to make pancakes, he even has bacon. After rummaging his kitchen after utensils I start making the batter and heating up the skillet. While standing by the stove I notice how quiet the apartment is, it makes me wonder if it's sound-proofed or something. His apartment is ginormous. It blows my mind how a single person can afford to live like this. Everything is top of the line - clothes, furniture, apartment. Think about how much money it is necessary t to be able to afford all this things. He almost makes Mansa Musa seem like he's well off. I start humming and dancing to myself to try and fill out the silence. The kitchen is filled with the smell of bacon and pancakes, amplifying my hunger. I hope Christian wakes up soon so that I can start eating.

Christian is still asleep when I'm done frying up our breakfast. _Should I go and wake him up or can I just start eating myself?_ That would be a little bit rude wouldn't it, especially when it isn't even my home? My debate is cut short when I hear footsteps behind me. When I turn around I see that he is wearing a tight grey t-shirt that accentuates his broad shoulders and loose pajama pants.

"Good timing." I tell him. Putting the plates with our food on the kitchen counter. "I didn't know how to use your coffeemaker so if you want coffee... then you'll have to do it yourself." He nods when I say this and walks to coffeemaker to start making a cup of coffee.

"Do you want a cup?" he asks.

"No, thank you. I don't drink coffee." I reply. "Are you hungry?"

"Starving." he says looking at me intensively. "Do you want me to put some music on?" he asks looking at me in way that makes me think that he's trying to read me.

"Yes, please." I answer him, and sit down at one of the chairs by the counter. I'm so hungry that I decide to start eating. James Brown's raspy voice fills the space with _It's A Man's World._ Christian goes to the refrigerator to get me some orange juice before he sits down beside me and starts to eat himself, giving out a few moans of appreciation as he chews. Maybe my pancakes are as good as Kate says.

"This is actually delicious." he smiles at me. I thank him courtly. My thoughts go back to the contract and the kind of relationship he wants to have. I want clarification and I want to know where we stand, but I'm afraid of bringing it up. I take a sip of orange juice while I stare at a cabinet in front of me.

"Can you please stop biting your lip? It's very distracting." he says unexpectedly while leaning forward softly to put a strand of my hair behind my ear. "What are you thinking about?"

"About the contract and our future relationship." I answer him honestly. He tenses a little. _Don't ask questions that you don't want the answer to Grey,_ I say to him in my thoughts.

"Anything in specific?" he asks frowning.

"Not really, but I don't think that I'm cut out for that kind of relationship. Being a submissive doesn't feel like something for me, Christian."

"Can't you at least try it?" he asks pleadingly.

"The thought of it doesn't really appeal to me."

"Anastasia, the whole premiss of BDSM is respecting boundaries and trust. It will all be stated in contract." he takes a small pause thinking about what he's going to do or say next. "It's all about communicating and being honest. I can go and get a contract for you to read through so you have an idea of what you're getting yourself into, if you want." I nod, and he gets up to get the contract.

I stare down at the plate, not sure what to expect. I start gathering our plates and put them in the dishwasher to keep myself occupied. Christian walks in holding the document in his hands, which he gives to me. I skim through it quickly.

 **RULES  
** _Obedience:  
_ The **_Submissive_** must obey every instruction that the **_Dominant_** gives as quickly as possible. The **_Submissive_** must subject herself to every sexual activity that the **_Dominant_** deems appropriate and pleasurable with exception to the hard limits (Annex 2). This she must do eagerly and without hesitation.

 _Sleep_ :  
The **_Submissive_** must see to get at least seven hours of sleep every night when she is not with the **_Dominant_**.

 _Food_ :  
The **_Submissive_** must eat regularly to maintain good health and well-being. The food she eats has to be included in the list of approved courses (Annex 2). The **_Submissive_** is not to ingest snacks or sweets with the exception of fruit.

 _Clothes:  
_ During the given period, the **_Submissive_** must only use clothing approved by the **_Dominant_**. The **_Dominant_** will provide a clothing account for **_the Submissive_**. The ** _Dominant_** will accompany the **_Submissive_** to purchase clothing as needed. If the **_Dominant_** so wishes the **_Submissive_** must, during the given time period wear the jewelry or accessories that the ** _Dominant_** chose, in the **_Dominant's_** presence or at other times as the **_Dominant_** chooses.

 _Exercise:  
_ The ** _Dominant_** shall provide **_the Submissive_** a personal trainer which she meets for one hour, four times a week at times as the personal trainer and the **_Submissive_** agrees upon. The personal trainer will report the **_Submissive's_** progress to the **_Dominant_**.

 _Personal hygiene/Beauty care:  
_ The **_Submissive_** must constantly keep herself clean and shaved and/or waxed. The **_Submissive_** must visit a beauty salon that is chosen by the **_Dominant_** at times the **_Dominant_** has arranged and to the treatments ordered by the **_Dominant_**. The **_Dominant_** pays all expenses.

 _Personal safety:_  
The **_Submissive_** is not to consume alcohol in excess, smoking tobacco, abuse drugs or expose themselves to unnecessary risks.  
 _  
Personal traits:  
_ The **_Submissive_** must not be part of any sexual relations with other than the **_Dominant_**. The **_Submissive_** must at all times conduct themselves in a respectful and decent manner, and will always address the **_Dominant_** as Sir, Mr. Grey or any other title the **_Dominant_** may direct. She must always be aware of that her behavior is a direct reflection of the **_Dominant_** s influence on her. She will be held accountable for any wrongdoing, breach or violation which she has committed of in the absence of the **_Dominant_**.

 **Any violation of the above rules will lead to immediate punishment, whose content is determined by the Dominant.**

 _Fuck._

"Hard limits?" I ask him.

"Yes, what you're willing and not willing to do. It doesn't have to define the agreement." he answers calmly.

"I don't know how I feel about the part of you buying me clothes and you paying for everything else." I say to him embarrassed. It seems like the contract is almost an agreement for payed sex. It doesn't feel right.

"I have a lot of money, Anastasia, that I want to put it to good use."

"But it doesn't feel right." I take a breath. "And why do you have to dictate how often the submissive trains and what she eats?"

"I want them healthy and in good shape." he says. "You can read through my set of hard limits so you have an idea of what you're getting yourself into." he takes the papers and turns over the pages until he finds what he's looking for.

 **Hard Limits  
** No acts involving fire.  
No acts involving urine or faeces or related materials.  
No acts that include needles, knives, piercing or blood.  
No acts includes gynecological instruments.  
No acts involving children or animals.  
No acts leave permanent scars on the skin.  
No acts that inhibit breathing.  
No activities involving direct contact with live stream (either direct or alternating current), fire or heat directed at the body.

Do people really want to do that kind of stuff? It seems like every sane human being wouldn't want to do that. I would never in a million years let someone do that to me. Just the thought of pee and sex wants me want to puke. _People like to this Ana, you aren't here to judge_ , I think to myself. And I guess that's true, whatever floats your boat. I bite my lip nervously.

"Is there anything you want to add? Anything you don't want to do?" he asks carefully.

"I don't know."

"What do you mean?"

"I've never done anything like this before."

"I know." he says softly. "But I will teach you to be the perfect submissive."

"I'm not agreeing to this Christian." I say to him quietly not daring to look at him.

"Ana, what the hell do you want for me. I've told you things I've never told anyone before, you know me better than anyone else by now. Why aren't you agreeing to this?" he says in a harsh tone. He's tone insinuating that he didn't know why I couldn't just roll over and let him do whatever he wants with me. I can feel the anger building up in my body.

"I'm sorry that I don't want my first time to be in a sex dungeon." I say to him sarcastically. "I'm not like you Christian. I want to try the old fashioned way to have sex before I jump into the BDSM."

"Are you a virgin?" he gasps. I nod at him angrily and stare him down. I can feel my cheeks turning red. Why am I embarrassed of the fact that I'm virgin? I don't know and right now I don't care. "No, you're lying! You drank on the never have I ever sex questions." he says trying to reassure himself.

"It's a freaking game, Christian, not a lie-detector test. I didn't want two strangers asking things like 'why?' while looking at me like there's something wrong with me or like they pity me." I say to him irritated.

"Fuck! Why didn't you say something?" he half yells.

"I don't walk around and telling everyone about my sexual status, Christian! We barely know each other." I half yell at him too. "I didn't think that it was any of your business." Why the hell is he so angry about the fact?

"I knew that you are inexperienced, but that you are a virgin...!" he says like it was something repellent. "Dammit, Ana, I took you inside my..." he groans. "Have you ever been kissed before?"

"I'm not a freaking nun, Christian. Of course I've been kissed before." I say offended. _Not as many as I would like, but still._

"I don't understand. You're twenty-one years old, almost twenty-two. You're beautiful. Why?"

"Why are you so angry? This doesn't affect you."

"It's not you I'm angry at. I'm angry on myself." he says while running his fingers through his hair. He looks around the room again and than at me. He seems to that a lot when his exasperated. He examines me, I can feel his eyes wander through my whole body. _Is he checking me out?_ "Come." he says, takes my hand and start leading me somewhere happily.

"What?" I ask him surprised. He went from pissed off to giddy in a microsecond. I learned something new about him, he's mercurial.

"We have to rectify this situation."

I stop abruptly. "What situation?" I ask him in a low voice.

"Your virginity. I want to sleep with you... Now."

"No." I let go of his hand. "My virginity isn't a situation that you need to fix, Christian." I say to him offended.

He looks a bit confused, completely oblivious to the effect of his words. "Do you want to go home?" he asks when he realized that maybe he has pushed a bit to far.

I think about it for a few seconds. Do I want to go home? "Yes, please."

* * *

Christian drove me back to Portland in silence. He seemed to be focused on the task at hand. I took up my phone from my purse to find a three text messages - all of them from Kate.

*Are you okay?*

*Where are you?*

*Ana!*

I reply her messages immediately. Telling her that I'm on my way home and that I'm okay. I put my phone in my purse again, sigh and watch the scenery change as we drive to Portland. I don't know why I feel so disappointed and defeated. Last night wasn't what I had expected and it definitely hadn't gone as planned. I had arrived there sexually frustrated and ready to do the deed, but that definitely went south. I realized something today - I do care about my first time. I thought that I've come to the point where I don't really care anymore, I just wanted to do it to see how it felt. But, I do care, and I want to do it with someone that cares about me.

"What happens now? Are we just going back to strangers?" I ask him while continuing to look out the window.

"You should stay away for me. I'm not the man for you." he says, his voice empty on emotion.

I nod because I don't know what to say. I want him to say no, that we at least could be friends. I guess that taught me not to ask questions that I don't want the answers to. The feelings I felt before only intensify. The car goes back to silent. I lean forward to turn on the radio, an unknown melody starts playing.

I don't know how long we've been in the car, only that twelve songs have played since we spoke last. We're in the familiar streets of Portland by now, and we're soon going to be outside of my apartment. Christian stops the car when we're outside.

"I'll tell Elliot that you're waiting for him." I say to Christian. "Thanks for letting me stay at your place and for the food. It was nice knowing you, I guess." I touch squeeze his hand a little before I take my bag and start opening the car door.

"Ana... I..." he begins to say. He looks panicked, trying to desperately find the right words. His grey eyes look sad as he runs his fingers through his hair. The control he so desperately wants to have is gone. I wait patiently for him to say something, hoping that it would be something like _"Can't we try the being friends thing?"_ or " _Let's go on a real date."_

"Good luck with finals." he says.

 _What?!_ Is that everything he wants to say to me? This is the worst goodbye ever.

"Thank you." I say to him trying to remove all signs of animosity. "Goodbye, Mr. Grey." I turn around, walk straight to my building, praying to God that I don't trip and make a fool of myself. I walk into my apartment to find Jose, Gavin, Elliot and Kate talking eagerly about something. They all quiet down when they see me standing by the door.

"Christian is downstair waiting for you." I tell Elliot meekly. I walk to the couch and sit beside Jose, he puts his arm around me.

"How did it go?" Kate asks to me eyeing me carefully. The guys eagerly await an answer.

"No comment." I answer them. All of them deflate like a ballon that has been punctured at the same time, it's almost looks comical.

"Hey, not fair spill the beans!" Kate says. I really don't want to suffer through Kate's inquisition right now. I really want to talk about this with them but I'm legally bound to that non-disclosure agreement, I can't say anything.

"That bad, huh? I need to learn my little brother some moves." Elliot says more to himself than anyone else. I give him a faint smile. "When are you guys seeing each other again?" Jose asks me eagerly.

I shrug, trying to look indifferent. "We aren't seeing each other again."

"What?! Why?!" Jose asks me shocked. "That guy obviously has a thing for you, and you for him, don't even try to deny it."

"It didn't work out." I tell them. Everyone looks at me questionably, knowing that something's up. I've never been able to hide my emotions.

"I should get going then." Elliot says. He kisses Kate sweetly on the lips. "Laters baby." he stands up. He shakes hands with Gavin and Jose and leans down and hugs me. "I'll talk to him." he whispers to me. _Good luck with that,_ I think to myself. He walks out the apartment, leaving me alone with two piranhas hungry for information.

"Are you okay, Ana?" Gavin asks me looking me directly in the eye. He has a special ability to tell if anyone is lying, he's even better than Kate. Never play poker with those to, they'll take you to the cleaners. Gavin has a square face with perfect brown, combed back hair. The color of his eyes remind me of warm sand. He is the kindest person I have ever met, but he can be ruthless, especially when his angry which doesn't happen often. He is currently studying to be a lawyer and has a year left.

I give him a big smile. "Yes, I am. I just want to study for finals and forget about this."

He nods understandingly, while Kate and Jose look at me disappointedly, waiting for the story of what happened. They both like to gossip.

"Can't you at least give us a hint of what happened?" Kate asks when she realizes that I'm not going to say anything about it.

"We wanted different things." I tell them, stand up and walk to my room. What I need right now is to focus on my studies, get through finals, and start living life. I feel my shoulders slump down as soon as I closed my bedroom door. I sit down at my bed and take a few deep breaths. _It wasn't meant to be, Steele._


	9. Chapter 9 - The Coincidence

Hi, everyone just wanted to say that the text messages that are bold are from Ana and the plain one's are from Christian.

Hope you enjoy the chapter! xx

* * *

 **Chapter 9 - The Coincidence**

I take deep breath as I put my pen down on the table, I'm done with finals. I can't believe it, I've made it with my sanity still intact. I bet that this is the first time in four days that I've smiled a genuine smile. I look around the room and see a few students writing frantically even though there is only two minutes left until the tests needs be handed in. My time in college is now officially over. This is the last time I'm going to sit in a crowded room with nervous students taking tests, now it's our time to go out into "the real world". No job offers have rolled in yet, which worries me a bit. I know that it is difficult to get a job, when you have practically no experience in the field and when you've just graduated college, but still, the bills have to be payed.

Kate and I are going to move to Seattle the day after graduation, so our apartment is filled with boxes that have to be moved to our new apartment. Kate's dad bought it for her. I guess that's one of the perks of coming from a wealthy family. My professor walks by and picks up my test and after he gives us the information on how and when our grade will be posted, we are free to go. I gather my things and meet Kate, Gavin and Jose by the parking lot. All smiling and seemingly happy. We drive back in Kate's Mercedes non off us talking about the tests we've just taken. I rummage around my purse after my keys.

"Ana, there's a package for you." Kate says while standing on the stairs. I scrunch up my face in confusion, that's weird I haven't ordered something on Amazon. Kate hands over the package to me, while she takes my keys to open the door. I put down the package on our kitchen table and start examining it. It's sent to Miss Anastasia Steele and there isn't a senders address, not even a company name. More weird. Maybe it's from my mom or Ray.

"It's most likely from my parents." I tell them while they stand around the table watching the packet curiously.

"Open it!" Kate says eagerly while she goes to the kitchen to go get the champagne to celebrate.

I open the packet and I'm surprised with a box made of wood and fake leather with three seemingly identical books in hardbacks. They're in an impeccable condition and there's a little note resting on top of the books that reads:

 _Why didn't you tell me there was danger?  
Why didn't you warn me?  
Ladies know what to guard against, because they read novels that tell them of these tricks._

"What does that even mean?" Jose asks confused.

I know the quote is from Tess of the d'Urberville and the coincidence is almost creepy because I just finished writing my final on this book. But then again maybe this wasn't a coincidence. I take out the books and see that they are the same book but in three volumes. I open up the first book and in the title page it says in a old typography.

 **London: Jack R. Osgood, McIlvaine & Co., 1891**

They're first editions and probably worth a fortune. I know immediately who sent them to me. Kate looks over my shoulder and takes the card. Gavin and Jose are looking at me expectingly.

"They're first editions." I whisper.

"No." Kate says, her eyes widening of surprise. "Grey?" Kate asks.

"Are you serious? What ever happened to flowers and chocolates?" Jose asks to no one in particular.

"What does that on the card mean?" Gavin asks me.

"I don't know. It almost seems like a warning - it feels like he is warning me all the time. I don't understand why, it isn't like I' haven't left him alone." I crunch up my eyebrows. _I do understand why he is warning me but I can't let you know that_ , I think.

" I know that you don't want to talk to him but he obviously likes you." Kate says to me.

I haven't allowed myself to think about him for this last few days. His grey eyes still haunt my dreams but that's something that I can't consciously control. I know deep down that it will take me a while to forget him - his smell and how his lips feel against mine. Why has he sent me those books? It was his choice to not have a relationship at all not mine.

"I have found a Tess original that is sold for fourteen thousand dollars." Gavin says quietly. I can practically feel the blood drain of my face. "But these books are in better condition than those online, so the ones you're holding are probably worth a lot more." he continues.

"Fourteen thousand for all three books or for each one of them." I ask Gavin. Christian is insane! Who in they're right mind spends that much money on practically a stranger.

"It's better if you don't know." Gavin says quietly.

"What do you think he's trying to say?"Jose asks.

"I don't know, and I don't care. I can't keep them, it's too much." I say more to myself than anything else. Kate and Jose look at me a little bit surprised but understandingly. Gavin just nods. "I should just send it back with an equally confusing quote from another part of the book." I say.

"Maybe the part where Angel Clare asks everyone to fuck off." Kate says jokingly. We laugh, but inside I'm already planning on what I should write when I send them back.

* * *

The four of us are now eating dinner at a relatively fancy Italian restaurant. Soft jazzy sounds fill the cosy room where quite a few people where at. There were astonishingly few students here. They probably went to the student bar a few blocks from here, partying their butts off. I'm just glad that we're not drinking heavily tonight, I would rather not repeat the other nights situation. If there's anything that I've learned from that night is that I'm capricious when I'm drunk and I rather not make a fool of myself... Again.

I'm looking at the desserts on the menu, when I feel the hairs on my neck stand up. It almost feels like a chill, but in a pleasant way. I know instantly who's in the room but I refuse to look for him. What the hell is he doing here? This is a long way from Seattle. I hear Kate and Gavin talk about their dessert choice, pannacotta with raspberry and lemon while Jose and I go for something more decadent - chocolate mousse. Kate and Gavin decide to start talking politics, which is the cue for Jose and I to talk about something else. Jose decides to bring up his upcoming art show in a gallery nearby.

"Ana, I've been meaning to talk to you about something." Jose says softly, almost sounding nervous. I've only seen Jose nervous twice: the day he asked Gavin out on a date and the day he went to the gallery to present his work. "You know that my show will be consisting of mostly stills of our surroundings, right?" I nod. "Well, I decided that I wanted to include portraits as well and I kind of included you in the show."

"How many pictures are we talking about?" I ask Jose. I trust Jose enough to know that he wouldn't put horrendous pictures of me in his show but I'm not overly excited about the prospect of me being in the center of attention.

"Seven." he says quickly. "But there are pictures of Kate and Gavin too. Even our dads." he continues.

"I trust you, Jose. If you think the pictures are good enough to have in your show, then it's okay." I tell him reassuringly, he gives me a tight hug.

"Wait, a minute. He's here!" he exclaims, while I'm still in his embrace. His facial expression tells me that he's excited by the fact that he is here. Ever since I came home from my impromptu sleepover with Christian Jose and Kate have been more attentive and tried to get me to talk about it. Gavin on the other hand has been more protective than usual. I really do appreciate his concern but I can handle myself. Ray taught me a few things and that includes the ability to throw straight and basic self defense.

"Who's here?" Kate asks absentmindedly. She is concentrated on the waiter that's approaching us with the desserts we ordered.

"Grey." Gavin says going straight to the point with his eyes focused on the target. Kate snaps her head back to try to get a good look at him. Judging by Gavin's eyes I would guess that he's behind me somewhere, but I don't dare to look.

"Do you see Elliot too?" Kate asks, hoping to see him.

"No." Jose says. "He's here with two other dudes in suits."

"Just ignore him, it's probably just a coincidence." I say to them at take a bite of the chocolate mousse. I can't help but moan of the delicious mousse that just hit my tastebuds. I quickly put a spoonful more in my mouth and relish the taste in my mouth. I need make this at home! I think I just found my favorite dessert, I think to myself.

"It seems like the chances of it being an actual coincidence are very slim." Gavin says.

"No, it isn't." Kate says. "He is funding some agricultural research at the university. He's basically their whole budget, he could be here overseeing his investment." she shrugs. "And for the restaurant thing, even though I admit that's a bit uncanny it isn't unlikely. He's a billionaire and we're in the most expensive restaurant in town." Kate says, looking satisfied with her answer and with her dessert.

"Still." Gavin mutters.

"Why are you so... Vexed with him?" Jose asks looking at his boyfriend with confusion.

"I don't know. He let Ana go, which means one of two things - there's something wrong with him or he is stupid. Maybe even a combination." he answers Jose. I stare at him agape, I didn't know he felt that way about me. I'm honored. "And you know that you're the only family I have left. So, forgive me if I'm a little bit overprotective." he sighs. I take his hand and kiss his cheek. Gavin's parents threw him out when he told them that he was gay, the only "real" family he has left, and that he actually talks with is his grandma and his aunt. Jose kisses him sweetly on the lips while Kate stands up and gives him a hug.

When I finish the second course, a little too fast for my liking, I go to the lady's room. The lady's room turned out to be a unisex bathroom with a few stalls. I have to admit that it felt a little bit strange to see a man in the same bathroom as me, but I quickly adjusted, went into a stall and did my thing. The bathroom is surprisingly homey - with its lit candles and dim lighting. It felt clean which is the most important thing with a bathroom, especially public ones. I stand in front of the sink, washing my hands when I hear the door open. I look in the mirror to get a quick glimpse of the stranger. The stranger turned out to be, not a stranger at all but the one and only Christian Trevelyan Grey. He has a black suit that seems to be tailored to perfection, it fits him like a glove. He doesn't have a tie, but his dress shirt has a few open buttons. He looks incredible. I take a paper towel and start to dry off my hands to make a swift escape.

"Ana." he says. I turn around and look at him. _What the hell do you want, Grey?_ I scream in my head.

"Christian." I answer him, making a point of looking him in the eyes.

"Can we talk?" he asks.

"What do you want, Christian? Make up your mind. You can't tell me that you don't want to be friends one day and then want to talk to me the next. And besides, why did you send me those books anyway?" I ask him.

"I just felt like I owed you an apology. I wanted to give you a gift after my bad behavior this last weekend." he shrugs. "I know that you love books, and that Tess of the d'Urberville is your favorite. It just made sense." he continues.

"You know I can't accept them."

"What?! Why?"

"Because they're to expensive." I tell him.

"Believe me, Anastasia. I can afford it."

"It's not even about that, Christian. Why should I have them?"

"Because I can afford them." he repeats, saying like it was the only logical answer to this situation.

"Just because you can gift them to me doesn't mean you should." I tell him resolutely.

"Why are you so stubborn?" he asks frustrated.

"Like you aren't stubborn as well." I sigh and try to make my way out of the bathroom.

"Wait!" he says while stepping in front of me, completely blocking my escape. "We weren't supposed to talk about that. I was an idiot this weekend. Can I take you out to dinner tomorrow?"

I look at him shocked, is he asking me out? In a public toilet? I can't say that I saw that coming. I don't know what to say, do I still want to go out with him knowing what I know? Our lifestyles don't match up at all, we are polar opposites. He's disgustingly rich and I currently have $683, 16 dollars on my bank account. He runs, what is basically an empire, while I'm currently unemployed. And last but not least the whole BDSM thing. He said himself that the dominant-submissive relationships are the only kind of relationships he can handle. Was that a lie or is he asking me out just because of something Elliot said? I don't want to be a charity case.

"Why?" I ask him quietly after a while.

"Because I'm not the kind of person that comes with flowers and chocolates... Romance isn't my thing. But I've never felt so attracted to someone before and maybe Elliot is right, perhaps it's time to let someone in." he says in one breath.

The moment is interrupted by an older man that walks into the bathroom. He looks at me and than at Christian with an confused look on his face. He asses the situation, mutters to himself that romance is indeed dead and walks towards the nearest stall. I bit my lip trying to contain my laughter, but its impossible. I start to laugh uncontrollably.

Christian looks at me amused but he's not laughing, still waiting for his answer. When I finally compose myself, I try to take a deep breath. My stomach hurts from laughing and my cheeks are slightly damp from the tears that came with the effort of laughing so hard. I walk out of the toilet to the somewhat secluded area outside of the restroom. I want to get answers from him, and I can't deny that it hurt when he said that he didn't want to have any kind of relationship with me. So, maybe I should listen to myself and just go with the flow with this one.

"Okay, I will go out to dinner with you." I say to him. I've never seen such a broad smile on anyone before. It reminds me of the Cheshire cat from Alice in Wonderland. He takes my face and gives me a quick peck on the lips, leaving me surprised and with very red cheeks.

"You won't regret it." he says and walks away to his table. He sits in a more private part of the restaurant where we wouldn't be able to be see him from where we're sitting. When I follow him with my eyes I see that he has company. Two men in suits sit at the table as well, seemingly slightly annoyed with Christian. I do recognize one of the men sitting at the table, but I can't put my finger on where I've seen him before. I shrug it off and walk towards my own table.

"What took you so long?" Kate asks me when I sit down again by the table. "Was there a long line?"

"No, it was almost empty when I walked in." I answer her.

"Then what happen? You where in there for fifteen minutes. Where you sick?" Jose asks concerned.

"No, I ran into someone in the bathroom." I tell them.

"Grey?" Kate asks excitedly. I nod.

"What did he say?" Gavin asks looking at me with a look that tells me that he's trying to read me.

"He actually apologized for his behavior this weekend and asked me out to dinner tomorrow." I tell them with a small smile.

"Did you accept?" Jose asks eagerly.

"What do you mean 'did she accept?'? Of course she accepted... Right?" Kate asks me looking unsure.

"Yes, I accepted." I tell them with a big grin. Kate and Jose high-five eachother and Gavin has a small smile on his lips.

"Turns out that he was stupid then." he says smiling. "Doesn't mean that I trust him yet, though." he mutters.

"Give the man a chance, Gavin. You haven't even met him." Jose says to him. "Ana knows that if Grey does anything to hurt her that we three, and probably my and her dad, will come pound on his door and cut his balls off." Gavin smiles at Jose's comment while Kate agrees.

"You know that I can fend for myself, right?" I ask them, with one eyebrow risen.

"We know." Kate says. "But nothing wrong with having accomplices." she says to me lovingly.

* * *

Kate and I arrive to our apartment around eleven. Christian apparently paid for our dinner, which annoys me. _If he keeps throwing his money around like that he will end up loosing the fortune he has amassed,_ I think to myself. I walk into the apartment that has been my home for three years. Next week I'll be living in a new home, in a new city, starting the next chapter of my life.

I walk into my bedroom and into my bathroom to start getting ready for bed. I start with washing my face first. My mascara has smudged a bit underneath my eyes and the soft, pink lipstick I wore to the restaurant has now completely vanished. I wash off my make-up and proceed with brushing my teeth. When I'm done, I go and say good-night to Kate, take a glass of water from the kitchen and walk to my room. I put the glass on my nightstand, I don't know why but I can't sleep if I don't have a glass of water by my side. I'm laying comfortably in my bed, reading _To Kill A Mockingbird_ by Harper Lee when I hear my phone buzz. It's a text message from Christian.

*I hope you're not sleeping. I'll pick you up by six. I look forward to our dinner tomorrow.*

 ** _*_** **No, I wasn't sleeping. Six sounds good. Can I ask where we're going?** ** _*_**

*A restaurant called Urban Farmer. Is that okay?*

 ***I've never heard of it before, but it sounds good. Good night, Christian.***

*Laters, baby*


	10. Chapter 10 - The Date

**Hello everyone!**

 **I will be on vacation for two weeks so I don't think that I will be able to update in a while.  
I hope that everyone is having a fantastic day or night wherever you are in the world.**

 **Thank you for all the support and for that you took the time to read my story.  
**

* * *

 **Chapter 10 - The Date**

I wake up feeling anxious and unwell. I have a headache and my throat feels scratchy and it hurts. Apart from that there's also the lump in my stomach that grows with just the thought of my impending date with the capricious adonis. I'm overwhelmed feeling anxious, excited, and to some extant afraid. The date seems pointless. We aren't compatible - in any way, we're polar opposites. I've been doing some research about his lifestyle and to be completely honest it scares me. To completely surrender my control over my body and give it to someone else, seems like the most intimate thing one could possibly do. Just the thought of it sends a shrill down my spine. _Maybe I should just call and cancel?,_ I think to myself while I toss and turn in my bed to find a more comfortable position.

After a few minutes I give up and stand up and to go to my window. People watching is something that I like to do - I like to imagine people's stories and their traits as they pass by. For example the woman that's walking to her car wearing what seems to be a dark blue pantsuit and caring a million things. She seems like a woman that is determined and knows what she wants in her life. The most bulky item that she's caring is a giant poster that she carefully puts in the backseat of her car. The woman gives confident aura and like she has a handle on her life, unlike me. She's probably on her way to work, in something like marketing or advertisement, where she's going too soon get a promotion. The woman is probably focusing on her career right know, so she doesn't have any serious relationships at the moment, just a string of friends with benefits and one night stands, and enjoying every second.

I sigh. _I wonder what people think of me as I walk by_ , I think to myself. I turn around to my desk and turn on my computer. I check my e-mail to see if I've received any responses from my job hunt. I've currently not received any offers - in publishing or otherwise. The lump in my gut feels a bit heavier. Kate already has her internship sorted out, she's interning at _Seattle Times._ She got the confirmation by mail yesterday. I'm elated for her, I just hope that I have the same luck soon.

The kitchen is empty and the apartment feels cold after the night. I go to the cupboard, take a bowl and a cup so that I can start preparing my breakfast. I decide that I want some cereal and a cup of Twining's English Breakfast Tea - my favorite. After taking a few bites of my food I realize that I really don't feel good. The food is making me feel nauseous and I'm cold. My body feels heavy and tender, as if somebody had beaten me up but not left a mark behind on my body. The plates are in the dishwasher when I decide to go back to sleep to try to sleep of my sudden cold. I just hope that this isn't the flu Kate had, because that would honestly suck.

My phone plings notifying me of an new text message. A groan escapes my mouth as I reach over to my nightstand to get a hold of my phone. It's a text message from Christian.

* Looking forward, to seeing you tonight. *

 *** I need to worn you. Not feeling so well so I may need to cancel. ***

* Is that the truth or is it just an excuse? *

 *** The truth, I think that I may have gotten Kate's flu. :( ***

I hope that he believes me. I really do want to go on the date and get some answers from him. I really want to know where he stands, what he wants and what Elliot said to him that made him change his mind. I've never met someone that is so confusing, fascinating and irritating at the same time. Christian isn't like anybody else that I've ever met or encountered. He is the kind of person that I've only read about in books, often as the antagonist of the story. The mysterious third party that gives the story suspense and drama. He is the kind of character that leaves you thinking what if the protagonist went with him instead. They never do, and I wonder why. My eyes feel heavier and heavier until I don't have the strength to open them again. So, I fall asleep with my phone in my hand.

"Sweetie, how are you feeling?" I hear Kate whispering. Even her whisper makes my head pound... No scratch that my head was already pounding. It feels like the pressure inside my skull isn't the same as the pressure outside of it. My throat fills dry and scratchy, and my nose is stuffed with snot so that I can't breath. _Great timing flu! Couldn't you've waited a few more weeks?!_ , I think to myself. All I want to do is to take a pillow over my head and scream into it, but I'm afraid that I'm going to die of asphyxiation because I can't move the pillow away from my face.

"You know that this is your fault right? How am I supposed to go to work tomorrow and graduate on Friday?" I whine in a raspy voice to Kate. I force my eyes open, but I close them back down again when bright light hits my eyes. It's a beautiful day outside, and unfortunately I'm stuck here.

"Is there anything I can do for you?" Kate asks guiltily.

"Can you bring me some tissues and a cup of tea?" I ask her.

"Sure, just yell if you want anything else." she says and leaves the room. I feel something dig into my back. I reach for it and find my phone. I have no new messages, and no apps that can keep me distracted for a while. There is a few things that I have to do. First of all I have to call work and tell them than I'm sick and that I won't be able to come to my last shift tomorrow, secondly I need to cancel the date tonight.

Mrs. Clayton answered the phone after the second ring. She could tell by my voice that I wasn't feeling well so she gave the day off. She told me that she would come by later with the cake that they had bought to celebrate my time in the store and the card they had bought for me. I tried to convince her that it wasn't necessary for her to come and risk getting sick but she insisted. Kate walks in holding a trey with a cup of tea, tissues and some crackers. She smiles at me weakly and sits next to me by the bed.

"I have to go to Seattle today and run some errands with my dad, will you be okay?" she asks me.

"Yes, I will probably sleep the whole day. So go! I will be fine." I say to her reassuringly. I sit up in my bed, take the cup of tea and sip on it carefully. _I have to days until graduation to get better,_ I think to myself. She nods and caresses my forehead.

"Sleep and drink as much as possible." She tells me. "You know that you can just call and I'll come right back. I can call Jose or Gavin and they could come here. I'm sure they wouldn't mind." she continues. I shake my head weakly and focus my gaze at the cup of tea.

"I don't want to get them sick to." I tell her, feeling the warmth of the beverage slowly spreading through my cold body. It feels good. "I promise you that I can take care of myself." I say to her while meeting her gaze.

"Yeah, but, I'll be spending the night in Seattle." she says worriedly.

"Kate, I'll be fine." I say with a stern voice, or as stern as it can be when the inside of my throat has been replaced with sandpaper.

"Okay, but promise, you'll call Jose or Gavin as soon as you need something." she says raising her perfectly threaded eyebrow. I nod.

Kate leaves the room and shortly after the apartment after reminding me once again of the promise I made. I have finished my cup of tea and now I'm just gathering the courage to pick the up the phone and cancel the date. I've never canceled a date before, is there a specific etiquette? Is there some obscure rules that dictate weather you should call or text when you cancel the date? Calling feels like the right thing to do, so that he can hear that I'm not lying. I take a deep breath as I click on his number. I notice that it's eleven o'clock and that he most likely is busy with work or in a meeting. _Well, it's to late now,_ my subconscious sneers at me. He answers almost immediately.

"Anastasia?"

"Hi." I squeak, my voice sounds worse than I actually feel. "Are you busy?"

"No, I'm not." he tells me softly. I think he knows what's coming.

"I don't feel so good, so I have to cancel our date. I'm sorry."

"You really sound awful." Christian says sounding a little bit surprised. "I thought that you we're lying when you wrote that before." he says guiltily.

"I wish it was a lie." I whine. "And for the record I would've come up with a better excuse than faking sickness." I say to him jokingly with a small laugh.

"Duly, noted. Can you give me an example so that I know in the future, Miss. Steele?" he asks me. I can hear that he is smiling.

"That's for me to know and for you to find out, Mr. Grey." I tell him teasingly. The line goes silent for a few seconds.

"Are you being taken care off?" he asks me gently filling the silence. I feels strange but nice hearing him talking in such a gentle voice.

"Yes, Kate brought me a cup of tea and some crackers before she left." I say to him.

"Left?" he asks.

"She had some errands to take care of so I told her to go." I tell him.

"She left you alone when you're sick?" he asks appealed.

"Christian, I'm sick, I'll be fine." I tell him irritated.

"I'm coming over, now." he says determinedly.

"No! You'll just get sick. It isn't worth it. I'm going to be fine. I appreciate that the thought though."

"I have a strong immune system." he says arrogantly. "I don't care what you say. I'm coming over." he says and just hangs up. Why in does he just hang up the phone like that?! Arrogant prick. I'm keeping the door locked, so that he can't come into the apartment. This is ridiculous, who goes to a strangers house to take care of said stranger. I take the duvet and my pillow and head for the sofa. I'm going to watch _Flipped,_ it always makes me feel better.

I concentrate in the world of Bryce Loski and Juli Baker. What I love about it is that it is so lighthearted and easy to watch. You don't have to think about it to much, what is exactly what I need to do. I find myself not being able to properly relax because of the imminent arrival of Christian Grey. I get a slight deja vu feeling over this. It seems history is repeating itself and he is coming after a stupid phone call. Why does he feel the need to always take care of me, a stranger? He doesn't know me, but still he feels the need to take care of the drunk girl that called him a few days ago, and now the sick girl who called him to cancel a date. Is he really that empathetic? From what I've gathered from my research on the internet is that he is ruthless businessman, "People who know me well would say that I don't have a heart, only a mind for business." he said in one of the few interviews that he has agreed to do in the last few years. But, still, he donates a small fortune to charity each year. Mostly to organizations that provides food to poor countries but also to a charity that helps parents and children who have a background of abuse and drugs. For a man who claims to not have a heart, he sure is generous.

The sound of knocking tells me that Christian has arrived. For a moment I debate weather I should get up and open the door or if I should just let him stand there for a while to teach him a lesson. I decide to let him stand there for a while, because I'm still irritated by the fact that he's here even though I told him that he didn't need to come. _I wonder if he is going to give up when I don't open the door,_ I think to myself. He knocks again after a few moments and calls my name, he sounds a bit worried. I stare guiltily at the door for a few more moments before I decide to go and open the door for him. But the telltale sound of a key entering the lock, makes me fall back hard on the sofa again. I turn my head towards the door and scrunch up my face in confusion. _How did he get a hold of a key?... Kate!_ She must've left her key under the rug for Gavin or Jose, and now Kate's concern has now come to bite me in the ass. _I told her that I would be fine!_ I complain in my thoughts. I turn my gaze back to the Tv and the movie. Trying my best to focus on what's happening in the movie and trying to look indifferent, to mask the fact that deep inside I'm a little bit moved by the fact that he took the time to come here and look after me. My head feels heavier and it hurts more than before, I really need to take an aspirin.

Christian walks in holding a few bags filled, with what seems to be food. He looks very domestic, something that I'm sure no one has accused him off before. His brown, coppery hair is tousled and he looks very dapper in a light grey, almost blue suit that is tailored to perfection. After he closed the door he went to the kitchen to unpack his goods. Once again I try to concentrate on the movie playing in front of me, but it is nearly impossible. I catch myself concentrating on the sounds he makes as he unpacks. The sound on the refrigerator door and the slight squeak of the cupboards as he opens and closes it's doors. I can hear him pouring something and heating it up the microwave, the only t His shoes make tiny sounds against the wood floor as he walks back to the living room.

"Keeping an extra key under the rug is dumb." Christian says sternly. "Anyone could've just waltz in." he says.

"Like you did?" I ask him, my voice cracking. "You need to learn to respect boundaries, they're there for a reason. Why are you even here Christian?" I ask angrily but my voice sounds weak and hoarse. He has the decency to look reprimanded and guilty. Is it just me who finds it creepy that he's here? He basically forced his way into my apartment. This man has no respect whatsoever for boundaries.

Christian stands in front of me holding holding a tray with what appears to be a bowl of soup, a glass of orange juice and some aspirin. The tray ends up on the coffee table. He sits down beside me and looks me in the eyes. "I get the feeling that you're always taking care of other people, just let me take care of you." he says softly, like he isn't sure if he has gone to far. I can't see anything else but good intentions in his eyes, so I hesitantly let this slide. I'm to tired to argue right now. I give him a small nod.

He leans over to get the bowl and gives it to me. "You have to eat." he says. "I hope that you're not a vegetarian, because it's chicken soup. But if you are, I can can Taylor to get some soup for you."

"I'm glad to inform you that I'm not a vegetarian." I inform him. He carefully places the warm bowl in my hands. I take the spoon and start eating the soup. I can't taste much of anything but the warm liquid is doing wonders for my sore throat. I feel Christians eyes follow every move I make, seemingly ready for anything and everything. It's making me uncomfortable.

"What are you staring at?" I ask him.

"Nothing." he says and moves his eyes to the movie, but I can tell that he isn't really paying attention, because neither am I. Christian seems so out of place here, like the apartment somehow is to small for him to be in. He looks around the room and sees all the stacks of boxes that holds the majority of our stuff. The only thing left to pack is the essential things that we left to pack the last they.

"When are you moving?" Christian asks.

"Saturday." I answer him.

"Are you taking you're car to Seattle?" he asks looking concern.

"Of course." I say. Wanda will be with me as long as she is running smoothly, she's my little baby.

"Are you sure it's safe?"

"Yes. Jose checks it regularly and it was a gift from my protective father. I will be fine."

"Why don't you just get a new car?" he asks me.

"Because I don't need a new car, I have Wanda." I say determinedly. He gets a mischievous look on his face, he is up to something. "Christian, don't do anything stupid - like buying me a car." I say to him, which reminds me of the books. I stand up to get them but my sight turns black and I can feel my legs give out under me. When I open my eyes again I feel Christian's arms around me.

"Are you alright?" he asks concerned.

"Yes, I just stood up too fast." I tell him. He nods but not believing my answer. "I'll be right back." I say to him.

"No, just sit here and I will get the thing you want." he sits me down at the sofa, and wraps me up in a the blanket I had before.

"I was going to get your books." I say to him. "They're on my desk in my room, I will get them for you later."

"Those books belong to you, I gifted them to you." He says slowly, trying to contain his irritation with me.

"It's too much, Christian. I can't accept them." I say to him.

"Ana, don't make me angry with you when you're sick."

I roll my eyes at him, thinking about a future plan on how to get the books in his car or something. I will not accept those books. He looks at me knowingly, with one eyebrow raised. He knows that I'm planning something. I move my eyes once again to the TV where the credits of the film are now rolling. A loud knock comes from the door.

"It's most likely Jose and Gavin." I say to Christian as I stand up. I walk slowly to the door and open it without looking through the peephole. To my surprise I see my dad standing by the door, looking worried at me.

"Annie, what happen? How are you feeling?" he says and puts his hand on my forehead to feel my temperature. He walks into the apartment leading me to the sofa but stopping dead at his tracks when he sees Christian. How am I supposed to explain this to my dad? Hi, dad. This is the man who wants me as his sexslave but don't worry I didn't agree to do it... Oh, but I did agree to go on a date with him instead.

"Annie, who the hell is this?" Ray asks me and right in that moment I have no idea what to tell my father.


	11. Chapter 11 - The Cure

**Hello everyone!**

 **As always thank you for taking the time to read my story.**

 **Recently I received a comment concerning my grammar and spelling. The person kindly suggested that I should get a beta reader. I think it is a wonderful idea since english isn't the language I grew up speaking and therefore misstakes in both grammar and spelling may occur. Let me know if any of you are interested and have the time to read through my story before I post them.**

 **As always, I hope you have an amazing day/night wherever in the world you are. xx**

* * *

 **Chapter 11 - The Cure**

I look at Ray while wondering what to tell him when something in his gaze catches my attention. He looks happy and curios. His look doesn't show any sign of protectiveness and disdain that I had expected from him. This leaves me shocked, what happen with the man I knew that just to "joke" about punching my future boyfriend? That man was gone with the wind.

"Hello, Sir. My name Christian Grey." Christian says while offering him his hand. Ray shakes his hand firmly. Christian is a few inches taller than Ray but they have the same built - broad shoulders narrower hips. Christian's modern suit against Ray's old jeans from 99' and washed-out t-shirt, made it seem like their where from a different worlds. My dad is sporting the rugged look with a buzzcut and a slight stubble on his cheeks. Every line on his face has a story to tell. Everything from the small scar over his left eyebrow that he got when he was eleven at his first fist- fight, to the wrinkles around his eyes that had seen war. "I'm Anastasia's... friend."

Ray looks a bit sceptic at his response but he doesn't mention it. "I'm Ray, Annie's father." he tells Christian. Ray takes my hand and leads me to the couch carefully, and when I'm sitting on it comfortably he tucks me in with the blanket I had on before.

"Dad, what are you doing here?" I ask him while a cough escapes my mouth. I try cover my mouth as good as I can with my blanket.

"Kate called, and asked if could take care of you while she was in Seattle." he tells me while putting his hands on my forehead to feel y temperature more closely. Both Ray's parents are doctors, which almost makes him a nurse by default. "But, I see that your… friend has that covered." he says looking over his shoulder to Christian and gives me a look that says "why didn't you warn me?".

"I told Kate, Christian, and now you that I'm fine." I tell them, trying to look stern.

"You're not fine." Ray and Christian say at the same time. They look at each other surprised, with Ray's eyebrow slightly raised and Christian's smirk. I believe that they're sharing a moment.

"Have you eaten yet?" Ray asks me. "She ate a bowl of chicken soup and drank a cup of tea earlier." Christian answers for me before I can do it myself. Ray nods and looks satisfied with Christian's answer.

"We have to keep her hydrated and try to get her to eat something with more substance to it." Christian nods. "My mom said the same thing." Christian tells my dad. "She's a doctor." he continued before my dad asked what she did for a living. Ray nodded his head.

I rolled my eyes at them and closed them, trying to ignore them or to just fall asleep. I really appreciate them taking the time to come here and take care of me. I try to breath with my nose but end up almost coughing up my lung when my blocked nostrils fail to lead any air to my lungs. Christian sits down worriedly beside me and starts to rub my back in circles.

"You should go. I don't want you getting the flu as well." I say to him while looking him in the eyes. I must look awful, with my runny nose and red eyes. "Who's going to run your empire if you're not there?"

"I only employ competent people, so, I think it will survive if I'm not there for a few days." he answers me while putting a strand of hair behind my ear.

"I think the real question is if you will survive being away from work for few days." Wait, did he really say a few days?

He chuckles. "Then, do me a favor and keep me distracted." I give him a small smile.

Ray clears his throat loudly, putting a stop to whatever that was. "Annie, I'm going to buy the ingredients The Cure. Do you need anything?" Oh no, not The Cure. It smells awful and tastes even worse. It has a green-grey color and it's thick - you can barely swallow it. You almost want to be sick instead of having to drink 'The Cure', but this is an emergency. The Cure is something brought up from hell, it works like a miracle every time but only demons would come up with that taste.

I think about his questions for a few seconds and the only thing that I think of that I need is tampons, but I can't ask my father for those can I? He wouldn't know which kind to buy and he would be embarrassed to even buy them. I don't want to repeat the fiasco of my first period all over again. I can ask Kate later for them or maybe even Jose or Gavin, they've done it before. "No, thank you. I'm good."

"And you, Christian?" Ray asks.

I've never seen a man look so surprised in my 21 years on this earth. Surely, people ask him if he needs something all the time? But, maybe more often than not people expect something in return for they trouble. Christian shakes his head. "No, thank you."

Ray nods is head, feels his pockets after his keys, wallet and phone and walks toward the door. He closes the door carefully, trying not to make to much noise on his way out. I look at Christian, he really is hot. … His defined jaw and his striking grey eyes that tells me more than his words will ever do. Women must throw themselves at him all the time, women that not only are attracted to him for his good looks but to his money. It has to be very tiring to have always have to watch you're back.

"Is it that rare for someone to ask if you need something without them expecting something in return?" I ask him. He shifts his eyes so they land on me. He nods softly.

"With a lot of money comes a lot of power. People think that I owe them something when they do something for me, for the most part." he says.

"That's sad." I tell him while I take his hand but he quickly removes it from my grasp.

"I don't want your pity." he says to me sounding a bit harsh.

"It's not pity, Christian. It's called compassion." I say to him softly feeling how my eyelids are slowly becoming to heavy for me to lift back up again. "And, when you get ill with the same thing that I have I will feel schadenfreude." By the time I'm done telling him this I have my eyes closed and I'm slurring as I speak.

Christian laughs softly at my comment. "Schadenfreude? Are you going to tell me 'I told you so'?"

"Oh, you bet. I'm going to say that 'I told you so' at least three times."

"Then I hope that I don't get sick, that I could tell you 'I told you so.'."

"You can dream about it, Mr. Fancy pants." I say to him jokingly.

"Fancy pants?" He asks me. I can feel that he is smiling slightly.

"What?! You have fancy pants." I laugh. My head starts sliding until it is stopped by a shoulder.

"Sleep Ana, and I will still be here when you wake up."

* * *

"How long have you been dating?" I hear Ray's voice say. I want to answer him that we're not dating yet, but I seemed to have forgotten how to control the muscles around my eyes and lips. So, I lie still in what I believe is Christian's arms. I can hear his steady heartbeat in his chest and I can feel the warmth of his skin through his shirt. Fingers are running through my tangled hair, sending shivers down my spine. There is nothing better, in my opinion, than someone running their fingers through my hair.

"Not long." Christian answers my dad. I imagine Ray giving him a short nod.

"How did you meet?" Ray asks Christian after a few seconds. I'm wondering what he's going to answer to that. Technically, we've met for the first time twice. The first, first time four years ago where he accidentally broke my hand and the second first time where we've met in his office. The fingers running through my hair stop for a moment.

"On a party four years ago." He tells him honestly. "She unintentionally spilled a drink on me, and I in turn accidentally pushed her over." Ray makes a sound of acknowledgment. I've told him about the man who involuntarily pushed me away and broke my hand four years ago. When he saw my broken hand on a impromptu visit to my college, he made me tell him everything that happen. Back then he was livid at the stranger who had broken his little girls hand.

"Can you tell me how you accidentally push someone away?" Ray asks him calmly. He sounds understanding like he knows something and he is just waiting for him to confirm it.

"I don't like to be touched." Christian says with a low voice.

There is a silence, where the only thing you can hear is the sound of my strained breathing. I can hear someone shifting their seat, it's probably dad because the only movement Christian makes is the soft up and down motion of his chest when he breaths.

"I never saw her again after that party that my brother dragged me to. I was so angry at him for dragging me there, 'I need you, bro' he said. When I had pushed her off me and I saw her sitting there with her hand against her chest, I felt bad. I remember thinking that even though she looked sweaty and in pain, that she was a good looking girl. Kate almost attacked me that night for hurting her, but believe me, I beat myself up that night. I thought that Ana was going to be angry, scream at me... Something, but she did nothing. She just looked at me, like she understood why I had done it. The only time she really yelled, was when I drove to the hospital instead of her dorm. She was insisting that she was fine even though she clearly wasn't fine. I drove her to the hospital, paid all of her medical bills and left with my brother." he tells my father. I listen closely to his retelling, wanting to hear the story from his point of view. "She walked into my office four years later. Kate had gotten the flu and couldn't do the interview, so she sent Ana instead." he laughs. "She is a horrible reporter. She was clearly nervous and looked like she lacked the confidence to be a journalist. I thought that she looked familiar but I ignored it. But, then, after she was done with the interview she apologized for hers and Kate's behavior that night, even though I was the one who had broken her hand." I can hear him smiling. "So, I asked to take her out."

"Typical Annie." Ray mutters. "I know who you are Christian, I do read the paper daily - even finance part. I have a good feeling about you, please don't prove me wrong." he tells Christian.

"I won't." Christian says to my father. His voice sounds so sincere and serious that one can't avoid to believe him.

Both are quiet for a while.

"You have to take care of her, even if she doesn't want you to. She's too stubborn for her own good." Ray says him solemnly. I want to roll my eyes at him, he has always been so concerned about me. I ask for help, when I think I need it. I'm not too proud for that, I just think that I don't need help that often.

"I will." Christian promises. "In fact, I was thinking about gifting her a new car for a graduation present." Christian says. _Oh no, you wont,_ I think irritated. He can by me a pen for a graduation present if he feels like it, not a fricking new car.

"I don't think it's a good idea." Ray tells him. "She won't accept it willingly."

"There is something that you need to know about me, Mr. Steele, and that is that I'm also too stubborn for my own good. She will take the car." Christian says confidently. _Do you want to bet?_ I think sure of myself. If I had the energy to actually move my muscles I would arch my left eyebrow.

"It's your war, my friend." Ray warns him, but I can hear the smile in his voice. I thought he loved Wanda, just as much as I do, but it turns out that I was wrong. "You would be doing me a favor." _TRAITOR!_ My mind screams at my dad. They are not taking my precious Wanda. She is sacred, hasn't anyone taught them to respect their elders? She probably was driven by their great grandparents, and this is how they repay her?

Their conversation switches to baseball and fishing. It turns out that they have more things in common with each other than Christian and I actually do. For some strange reason is the thought of Christian and Ray getting along making me very happy. I'm starting to realize that I really like the man that is currently holding me tight against his chest, and I'm realizing that he seems to like me too. He took the time to come and check up on me when he heard that I was sick. I should stop being so harsh and actually give him an honest chance.

There is a knock on the door. "Do you know if she's expecting anyone?" Ray asks Christian. Judging by the movement of his body, he is shaking his head. I hear steps, and the telltale sound of the door opening.

"Who are you?" Ray asks.

"Hi, I'm Paul and I'm looking for Anastasia Steele." he says nervously. Paul?! What is he doing here? The cake! I Can feel Christian lifting me up and laying me softly back down on the sofa.

"I'm her father, Ray." Ray says to Paul. "and I'm her boyfriend, Christian." I hear Christian say. _Did Christian Grey really just say that I was his girlfriend?_

"I didn't know that Ana had a boyfriend." Paul says sounding confused. "That explains a lot." Paul mutters.

"What do you want?" Christian asks irritated.

"My aunt asked me to drop off the cake and card." he says meekly. "My aunt owns the hardware store she works in... Eh, used to worked in now." there is a little pause. "You look familiar... Wait are you Christian Grey - CEO of Grey Enterprises Holdings?" Paul asks. Of course Paul knows who he is, he study's business in Princeton.

"Yes, I am." Christian says sounding very arrogant. I imagine him standing there and looking impassive and important. Like he has better things to do than stand there and explaining to a stranger who he is.

"Wow, I've never took her for that kind of girl." I hear Paul say, in a low voice. He probably didn't mean to say that out loud. I wouldn't want to be Paul right now.

"What kind of girl?" Ray asks sharply. His tones indicates that he should be very careful with what words he uses to describe me next.

"Eh, nothing." Paul says. "I have to go. It was nice meeting you."

The door closes after him with a little too loud bang. The sound of it bouncing of the walls. Grunts and noises that express anger and exasperation come out from their mouths. They start bashing Paul, and somehow along the way, I don't know how, my consciousness surrenders to my tiredness once again overtakes my body.

* * *

I wake up in my bed with the sun setting. The orange-red light entering my room, making everything glow. My body feels very heavy, I'm freezing and I really need to blow my nose. It's completely stuffed making me breath through my mouth, witch has resulted in a very dry throat that feels like the Sahara. I shut my eyes again, and send a little prayer to the gods above that to please speed up my recovery. I go up to take a glass of orange juice in the kitchen. On my way there I find my dad and Christian in the living room; my dad is watching TV while Christian is doing something on his laptop.

"Do you guys want something from the kitchen?" I ask them, while walking to the kitchen in what feels like slow motion. Both men look at me at the same time. Christian tells me that he can get it for me. "I need to move a little." I tell him.

When I come back to the living room it seems like they haven't moved at all. My throat feels a lot better now that it's not as dry. I sit down between them.

"What are you doing?" I ask Christian. I try to make a point of not looking into the his computer screen, so that he doesn't think that I'm snooping. He looks very concentrated at the bright screen while he writes something in an incredible speed. His fingers making make faint clicking sounds.

"Answering work e-mails." he answers my question. He closes his laptop and looks at me. "How are you feeling?" he asks me looking a bit concerned.

"Better." I tell him and that is not a lie. The difference is barely noticeable but there it's there. Christian nods, but I can see that he doesn't believe me.

"Annie, are you ready for The Cure?" Ray asks me. I instinctively scrunch up my face, I'm not looking forward to it.

"I will never be ready for The Cure, dad." I tell him. Seriously, The Cure is stuff from nightmares. Ray laughs and goes to the kitchen to get it.

"What's The Cure?" Christian asks.

"You'll see." I tell him. He scrunches up his face. "What's that smell?" he asks horrified.

"The Cure." I say sounding sad and disgusted.

Ray sits down beside me, holding a big spoon with the unappetizing goo and big glass of orange juice. He looks at me with pity, he knows how bad The Cure is. Christian, on the other hand, looks at the spoon like it is poison.

"What the hell is that?" he says disgusted.

"The Cure." Ray says seriously. And gives the spoon to me. _Just do it, Steele!_ I do it, I chug down the spoon and grab the glass of juice from my dad drink everything from one go - every last drop. The taste of The Cure still lingers in my mouth, making me want to throw up.

"Well done, Annie." Ray says while stroking my back. Christian looks like he can't comprehend what just happened. "I would almost rather be sick that take that goo." he says.

"Well, this is an emergency." I tell him. "Can we talk about something else, please?"

"How are you feeling about graduation?" My dad asks me.

"I don't know yet. Ask me again on Friday." I smile at him. "I'm a bit worried about work though."

"Why?" Ray asks.

"There aren't that many companies that want to take on an inexperienced college graduate." I tell him.

"You could always work in my company." Christian says. "We offer an excellent payed internship. And even if you don't want to work for me like you said before, I could help you get a job." he continues.

"Thank you, but no thank you." I croak. "I want to find a job on my own. Thanks for the offer though." He nods again looking annoyed at me. Ray has the same look on his face. I roll my eyes at them.

"Well, I should get going." Christian says suddenly. He stands up and I can feel my face scrunch up in confusion. "Where are you going?"

"Your dad is here, so I'll go back to my hotel for the night and then I will come back tomorrow." Christian says looking a little sad. And if I'm being honest, it makes me a little sad as well. I nod. I stand up as well. Christian reaches his hand to Ray's and shakes it. "Nice to meet you, Sir." he says to him.

"Likewise, Christian." he says and sits back down on the couch, his eyes focused on the baseball game. I follow him to the door.

"I'll be feeling a lot better tomorrow." I say to him. "Maybe we can go for a short walk." I ask him.

"Sure." he says looking behind me fast. He bends down and kisses me softly on the lips fast.

"That wasn't the best idea. Now you're getting sick for sure." I tell him.

"It was worth it." he says with a small smile. "I'll see you tomorrow then."

"I hope so." I smile at him. He gives me a last smile and then turns around and walks away.

I walk back to the couch and sit down back again on the couch. I lay my head against Ray's right shoulder.

"You know I saw that." he tells me. I feels my cheeks redden. "Annie, he seems to be one of the good ones. Just give him a chance."

"I will dad." I say to him while staring at the TV and once again I feel myself drift off into dreamland.


	12. Chapter 12 - The Coffeehouse

**First off I want to apologize for how long it has taken me to upload this chapter. I recently went back to school and work and found it hard to find the time to write the story. I also struggled with ideas and I wasn't sure what to write.**

 **Secondly I would also like to apologize for any errors that I have made, I just wanted to upload this chapter as quickly as possible.**

 **As always thank you for taking the time to read my story!**

* * *

 **Chapter 12 - The Coffeehouse**

I walk to the kitchen as quietly as I can. I want to get a hold of the cake that Paul brought over yesterday and eat it before Ray wakes up. In my opinion there isn't anything better than a sweet breakfast. Sugar seems to taste about a thousand times better in the morning. I like to think that eating all the heavy things early in the day is much better for you because you get the chance to burn all the extra energy throughout the day. I know that Ray would prefer that I ate a more healthy or hardy breakfast in the morning, something like eggs and bacon and maybe even some potatoes, but, unfortunately for him I don't like feeling like a stuffed turkey in the morning.

I'm by the sofa when I hear Ray moan "Annie, haven't I taught you anything? You can't hide anything from me."

I close my eyes, sigh, giggle and sit beside him on the couch. Ray is looking at me with sleepy eyes and with a big smile on his lips. My dad really has a way of making me feel like the most loved daughter in the world. He looks at me sometimes like I'm some kind of miracle. I love him so much, I don't know what I would've done without him. He raised another man's baby, even when he didn't have to. He could have just let me go with my mom, but he fought for me. In the beginning he came and visited me as often he was allowed and when my mom met Stephen and we moved to Texas he came as often as he could. He even took me in after I called him crying after a big fight with Stephen. I don't remember what we were fighting about it just got out of hand and he slapped me. That day I took my things, begged my mom to come with me, she refused, got out of the house and called Ray. He booked me on the soonest flight to Seattle and I've lived with him ever since. My mom even signed over full custody to him. My relationship with my mom is much better now that Stephen is out of the picture.

"I decided to try." I answer him, pouting. I give him a smile. "Did you sleep good, dad?" I give him a kiss on the cheek.

"Yes, I did. You look better." he says, watching me closely. He even puts his hands on my forehead to feel my temperature. Honestly, I do feel a lot better now, than I did yesterday. The ache in my body has disappeared along with the pain I had in my throat. The only remaining symptoms of my sickness is my runny nose and the croaky, sick sound of my voice.

"I feel a lot better." I tell him and continue to walk towards the kitchen. Ray knows better than to argue with me about my morning food preferences. It's the only real "fight" we ever had had, and he learned his lesson. He says that I'm scary when I'm mad, that it's like I'm possessed. Apparently my eyes become black and my voice becomes lower and more menacing. I laugh at the thought.

"Never doubt the power of the cure." I hear Ray say behind me. According to Ray the Cure recipe has been in the Steele family for many generations. The recipe that my great-great-grandmother Adelaide wrote on a piece of paper is one of Ray's most treasured possessions.

While in the kitchen I start to make some coffee for my dad, who is an avid caffeine addict. He can't function properly without at least a cup each morning. In the meanwhile I take the remaining cup and plate from the kitchen countertop that Kate and I haven't packed. In the fridge I find the glorious cake and serve my self a generous portion. While I wait for the coffee to brew I go through my phone to see if I have any messages. I have one from Kate.

 ***How are you feeling?***

*Good, thanks. When are you coming back?* I answer her.

 ***This afternoon, I've missed you.***

*Me too.*

With our impromptu breakfast in hand I walk to living room. I put down the steaming cup of coffee on the coffee table and then sit down on the sofa with my plate of cake, when I hear Ray say. "You know what I think about your breakfast preferences." he mutters rather loudly.

"I don't care" I say with a loud moan. The cake is light and fluffy but still moist without being soggy. The layers in between are filled with berries and buttercream. It is really delicious, if I could I would eat this everyday. "I made coffee for you." I say while leading him to the cup with my look.

He comes back to the living room after being in bathroom. His hairline is slightly damp making his hair look a bit darker than it actually is. His blue eyes, that somehow remind me of my own, look at expectantly. "We are going out to eat breakfast." he says firmly, not caring at all what I might say. I give him an eye roll and continuing to concentrate on eating my cake. My mind drifts while I chew and settles on the vague memory of Paul dropping of the cake here. What an ass, I'm glad I didn't go on a date with him. I would've liked to see his face when he saw Christian and my dad standing by the door. That would've been something! His eyes had to be springing out of his orbits when Christian told him that he was my boyfriend. Ha! It would've been priceless. Wait... He did call me his girlfriend. I feel my face scrunch up in confusion. I'm sure he said it as a spur of the moment thing, but it still feels weird and kind of good. I'm flattered.

"Annie, you're thinking so hard that I can practically see smoke coming out of your ears. What's the matter?" Ray asks me.

"I just thought of my graduation tomorrow." I tell him with a smile. "It feels so surreal. It's the day I've been working towards for four years and it's finally here." I see Ray giving me a beaming smile.

"You deserved it, kiddo. I couldn't be prouder even if I tried." he puts his arm around me and sighs. "You're not my little girl anymore."

I turn my head and look at him. "I'll always be your little girl."

The room is comfortably quiet, both us enjoying the peace. He drinks his coffee while I finish up my cake. The door rings disturbing the peace. I get up and go to answer the door. Taylor is standing by the door holding a white bag, which he hands over to me. "Good morning, Miss Steele. Breakfast per Mr. Grey's request."

"Good morning, Taylor." I smile at him, now that I've seen my dad recently I really do see the resemblance more. If I didn't know better I would've thought that they were family. "Do you want to come in?"

"Who's Taylor?" I hear my dad ask behind me. "Annie, how many boys do you have after you?" I feel a blush rushing to my face.

"Excuse my dad." Taylor has a smirk on his face when my dad walks in. Both men who already have a very straight posture, stand straighter and bring their shoulders back making their chest seem larger. Both look at each other straight in the eye. It seems like they are sizing each other out.

"Military man?" my dad asks Taylor.

"Yes, Sir." Taylor asks. "Ranger. You?"

"Marine." my dad says. They both nod. "Who are you?"

"Taylor is Christian's bodyguard." I tell my dad quickly. Taylor makes a grimace at the word bodyguard. "I mean personal security." I correct myself when I noticed his reaction to the word bodyguard.

Ray nods accepting the answer that I gave him. I step aside from the door giving Taylor space to come in and drop off whatever it is he is holding. He drops it off on the coffee table on the living room.

"Mr. Grey apologized that he couldn't come over immediately he had a last minute meeting this morning with an associate, so he sent over breakfast for the two of you. He asked me to tell you that he would come over as soon as possible." I nod while I sit down on the sofa, Taylor starts to unpack the food he brought.

"Thank you very much Taylor." I tell him sincerely, I feel kind of bad that he was told to bring the food over, I'm sure it's not in his job description to drop of food. Taylor says goodbye and walks out the door as quickly as he showed up and my dad and I start to eat the breakfast that was so kindly sent to us.

* * *

My dad and I are walking through town enjoying each others company. It's fairly empty with a few people crossing our paths. The boutiques are small, cozy and there's an originality about them that excites me. They still have personality left in them unlike the big chains of stores that seem to loose all of theirs along their way. As we walk on the sidewalk I notice a pile of books stacked up in rather big boxes. They look new and as I walk closer I notice that there are prices written on the boxes along with a note saying that all the proceeds that comes from the books will go to charity. I feel my face crack up, _This is the kind of shopping that I like_ , I think to myself. _And I don't even have to feel guilty when I buy them because all the revenue will go to charity!_

The first book I see is Camilla Läckberg's crime novel _The Ice Princess_. The author is probably Swedish, or from another Scandinavian country. I really liked Stig Larsson's Millennium trilogy, maybe I should buy it it's only 3 bucks. I crouch down and start to go through all the books in the box. I hear a sigh "This is going to take a while." I hear Ray mutter behind me but I ignore him and take my sweet time looking through all the books.

Just the simple task of going through the books fills me up with a sense of excitement and happiness. I love the feeling of holding a book, the texture of the paper and the faint smell it gives. I love the sound a page makes when you flip a page but what I love the most is the thrill of finding out what's going to happen next in the story and getting to know the protagonist even better than you know yourself. There is something magical about literature. What can I say? I really love books.

When I'm done looking through the boxes I'm left with eight books that I want to purchase. I make a rough estimate on the total price of the books and came to the conclusion that my whole purchase will be on a whopping 18 dollars. I smile and start to walk towards the cash register.

"You need so little to be happy, Annie." Ray tells me with a smile. "Let me buy those for you." Ray says.

"I can by them myself, Dad." I say to him carefully.

"I know you can, but I want to. Let me buy the books." Judging by the look on his face this isn't a battle worth fighting.

"Thank you, dad. I really appreciate it." I tell him and give him a kiss on the cheek. He walks away with small smile to the cashier.

I turn around when my dad enters the store. This the last time in a while that I'm going to be here and when I realize that I get kind of sad. This place has been my home for the last four years, and I would be lying if I said that I wasn't going to miss it. I feel my butt start to vibrate.

"Hello, mother." I tell her jokingly. "What's up?"

"Hey, Anna. How are you?"

"I'm good, when do you guys arrive? Graduations starts at eleven."

"That's why I'm calling." I hear her say. She takes a deep breath. "Bob broke his foot while playing golf of all things."

"Is he okay?" I ask her concerned. "Is he in a lot of pain?"

"Who can tell with the man he calls the paramedics for a blister. It means though that we aren't able to fly in for graduation." I feel myself getting disappointed.

"Really? Can't you just come alone? You don't have to bring Bob."

"Heh, and leave Tiger Woods to fend for himself? You don't understand don't you darling?" Carla says with a sweet apologetic voice.

I close my eyes and take deep breath. "Yeah... Yeah it's fine." there's a small pause. "Eh, mom I really have to go."

"I love you, Ana." my mom tells me.

"I love you too, Mom" I tell her and hang up. I just stare at the phone that have in my hand and let the disappointment fill my body. At least Ray is there when I graduate.

Ray walks out of the store holding a paper bag filled with my books. I smile meekly towards him and thank him again for his generosity.

"Sweetie, what happened while I was in the store?" Ray asks me looking concerned.

"Mom isn't coming to graduation." I tell him.

"What?! Why?" he asks me. His voice sounds kind of angry.

"Dad, it doesn't matter. It isn't a big deal." I lie, it does matter and it is a big deal but I know what Ray will say. Carla's and Ray's relationship has been forced ever since I moved in with him after Stephen. The taciturn man completely disappears when my mom is in the picture. I often wonder how they even got together in the first place. "I have you there." I smile at him. He squints at me trying to decipher how I really feel but if there is something that Ray taught me is to how to have a poker face. He sighs and gives up. We start walking towards the apartment again.

My phone starts to ring once again. What's happening? I never get this many phone calls. It's Christian.

"Hey there." I greet him.

"Hello, where are you? I'm at your apartment but you aren't here." he says.

"Oh, we're just a few blocks down from the apartment. Dad and I went for a walk." I tell him. "Depending on what you want to do you can meet us here." I continue.

"That depends on how you're feeling." Christian tells me.

"I'm fine. The Cure worked it's magic."

"Well, then if you'd like we can go and drink a cup of coffee?" he asks.

"That sounds very nice." I say excited. I really feel like drinking tea. "I'm at the crossing at NW 23rd avenue and W Burnside Street."

"Then I'll be there shortly." he says and hangs up.

I put my phone in my back pocket again and hug the paperback with books. I'm still kind of sad that my mom won't come to my graduation tomorrow, but the books, hanging out with my dad and a coffee-date with Christian is slowly turning the day around. Kate is bound to come back this afternoon from Seattle.

"So, I'll get going to your apartment." Ray says to me. He gives me a quick hug and proceeds to walk back. I'm leaned against a wall when Christian arrives. He is wearing a dark washed denim, with a black t-shirt and a very expensive looking leather jacket. He looks so cool, almost like a biker or a rocker, a very good natured one. He has his signature hairstyle - tousled and messy, somehow he makes the coiffure look sophisticated and classy.

"Ready to go?" he asks.

I nod and let him lead the way. We're walking very close to each other, our shoulders are touching, but neither of us makes says anything. I almost feel like a small child that is hanging out with it's first crush. Christian takes my hand as he walks right following W Burnside Street. _Should I say something?_ I think to myself with a hint of panic. I don't even know why I'm so highly strung, this isn't the first time we're alone but I can't say that it went particularly well last time we were alone...

In front of us there is now a small coffeehouse called _Coffeehouse Northwest_ that looks small and cozy. The wood furniture looks a bit tarnished and the padding on the chairs is worn out. The walls were painted in a soft cream shade, and one wall had a collage, or rather a collection, of Polaroids. Pictures of strangers put up on a wall doing mundane things like drinking a cup of coffee, having a conversation, people behind computer screens and students studying for tests. In the far corner of the collage I noticed that the picture the owner Sally took of me reading a book, three years ago. My eyes are focused on the book and my lips had become a thin line. I smile a bit at the memory.

"Can't you choose a table while I go and fetch the coffee? What do you want?" Christian asks me, as courteous and polite as ever.

"English breakfast Tea but with the tea bag on the side." I tell him.

"No coffee?"

"I'm not particularly fond of it."

He smiles.

"Okay, tea with the bag on the side. Sugar?"

"No, thank you." I smile at him.

"Do you want something to eat?"

"No, thank you." I shake my head and he walks away to the counter. I watch him surreptitiously while he stands in line waiting to be served. He really is an adonis. He runs his fingers through his hair... _Hmm... I would like to do that_. The thought springs up into my head unannounced and making me blush crimson red. I have no idea where that thought came from. _Yes you do,_ my subconscious laughs. I bite my lip and focus on going through my new books.

"What are you doing?" Christian asks putting down a tray containing a cup of boiling hot water, with the tea bag on a small dish. His coffee has the delicate pattern of a leaf on looks delicious even to me, a person that really doesn't like coffee. He also bought a blueberry muffin. When he is sitting comfortably in his chair, he puts one leg over the other making him appear relaxed and satisfied.

"My dad and I went past a small book store and he bought me some books." I say excited, sounding like a little girl that really wants to show off her new toy.

"Can I look?"

"Of course." I answer him and hand him over the bag containing the books.

He looks through the bags and shows me the cover of Haruki Murakami's book _Men Without Women_ with one eyebrow raised. Daring me to explain why I chose the book.

"I read some great reviews about the way he writes. It's apparently 'easily accessible, and yet profoundly complex'" I answer him.

He holds up a copy of _Europe Through the Back Door._

"Someday I'm going to travel through Europe and I want to be prepared." I tell him shyly. I take the tea bag, dunk it in the water and then quickly put it back on the dish. He looks at me confused.

"I like my tea black and weak." mumble as an explanation.

"I understand. When is Kate coming back?" Christian asks.

"Today." he nods.

"You are a mystery, Miss Steele." Christian states. I scrunch up my face in confusion.

"There's nothing mysterious about me."

"I consider you to be a very self-confident woman." Am I? I guess I am, I've never thought of myself as one. " Unless you're blushing, of course, which is quite often. I only wish that I knew what is making you blush." he puts a small piece of muffin in his mouth it starts to slowly chew it without moving his gaze from mine. I feel myself blush. _Shoot_!

"Do you always make such personal comments?"

"I didn't realize that I did. Did I offend you?" he asks surprised.

"No." I told him honestly.

"Good."

"You do realize sometimes do you can sound pretty patronizing?"

His eyebrows shoot up his forehead making him seem surprised and it looks like he is blushing a little bit.

"I'm used to getting my own way." He said quietly.

" I don't doubt that."

"Are your parents coming to the graduation?"

"Ray is but not my mom she has to stay home and take care of Bob." I tell him sadly.

"Nothing serious I hope."

"He broke his foot." Christian looks confused with my answer let's the subject be which I'm very grateful for. He changes the subject.

By the time I get home we've talked about anything and everything. Nothing of importance really but just getting to know each other, which was wonderful. Kate was already home when I arrived and my dad had made his famous chili con carne. We all ate together and then we all went to bed early so that the day that we've eagerly waiting for, graduation day, would finally arrive. 

* * *

**I'm sorry for the ending I know it was rushed.**

 **I hope you have a great day or night wherever in the world you are!**


	13. Chapter 13 - The Graduation

Hope you like the latest chapter.  
Thank you for taking the time to read and comment my story. I really appreciate it!  
As always I hope that you're having a good night/day wherever in the world you are.

* * *

 **Chapter 13 - The Graduation**

I'm ready to go when Ray knocks on my bedroom door. The dress I'm wearing is in a soft pink color that goes up to a high neck but scoops a bit lower on the back. My hair falls down in waves, pretty much covering my exposed back, and on my feet are the only pair of heels that I own - a pair of black pumps. For the first time in a while a feel like an official adult, as of today I have the tools that I need to follow my dreams. I haven't got a single job offer yet, but I still have faith that I will soon get a job.

Ray stands in front of me wearing his ill-fitting suit. The feeling of overwhelming love and gratitude that I have for this uncomplicated man makes me jump into his arm and give him a tight hug. I honestly don't know what I would do without him or where I would be.

"How you're holding up, Annie?" Ray asks me while he hugs me. He examines me with a puzzled look, trying to figure out why I gave him the unexpected hug, as he holds me at arm's length.

"Is everything okay?" Ray asks me with a small smile and with a slight color on his cheeks.

"Yes, I'm just glad you're here." I tell him honestly.

"Where else would I be?" he asks me confused. "Annie, you look fantastic."

"It's one of Kate's dresses." I explain with red cheeks and feeling embarrassed. Accepting compliments has never been my strong suit.

"Ana, how many times do I have to tell you that the dress is yours? It was a gift, accept it and move on." Kate says to me while looking at herself in the mirror while applying red lipstick. She looks lovely and very sophisticated in a dress that stops right before her knees and has a slight cleavage. She looks cool as a cucumber and not at all nervous for the speech she is supposed to give in just a few hours. Shouldn't she be at the university already?

"Shouldn't you be at the university?" I ask Kate changing the subject from me.

"Yes, I'm on my way now. See you later." She gives Ray and I a hug and then proceeds to walk out of our apartment. The sound of her heels walking down the stairs echoing back to us.

"Should we get going?" Ray asks looking at me with what I think is pride.

"We have half an hour left. Do you want some tea?"

* * *

Ray pulls up in the parking lot by the university and we follow the crowd that is walking towards the gymnasium where the majority of students already have their black and red gowns.

"Good luck, Annie. You seem to be nervous, are you nervous about the graduation or the fact that Christian is here?"

"Eh... Both? It is a very special day today."

"My little girl is graduating college. I'm so proud of you, Annie."

"Thanks, Dad." I really do love this man.

There's a lot of people in the gymnasium. The large crowd of people seems to be buzzing for the occasion and there seems to be excitement in the air, alongside with the smell of a little to much perfume and a little bit of sweat. Ray has gone off to find Jose, Gavin and probably Jose Senior amongst the mob of people.

I now have on my gown, and it makes me feel anonymous and safe. There's no one on stage yet, and I sit here wondering if maybe Kate and Christian are talking to each other. I wonder how long the speeches will take? As far as I know three people are giving a speech - Kate and Christian. Kate's speech is about ten minutes and I assume that Christian's and the headmasters will be about the same, therefore it should take about 30 minutes for the three of them. But, I don't think that the speeches are going to be the part of the day that's going to take the most time. What's going to take the most time is the giving out diplomas. Urgh, it will take forever.

I find the place at the second row amongst all the other student's whose last name starts with S. I look back and see that Ray has found the others, they look happy and seem to be laughing about something. I decide to give them a little wave but regret it soon after when Jose, starts hollering something at my direction. I sit back down as fast as I can and try to blend in with the crowd. The only thing there's to do now is waiting.

The gymnasium is soon filled to the brim with people. The seats on both sides of me are now occupied. I've never seen this girl before, but they, however, seem to be good friends and are talking loudly. The headmaster walks out onto the stage, followed by two student counselors and the professors. All of them dressed in the same attire. Some of the professor nod and wave to the students while others sit down and look bored like they just want to get this thing over with. Last to walk out onto the stage is Kate and Christian. Christian is the only one wearing a suit. He looks serious as he sits down unbuttoning his suit jacket. I notice his tie, it's a very nice gray tie with a pattern that I can't see from this far away. The applause slowly dies out.

"Look!" One girl says excitedly to the other.

"He's hot."

I feel my muscles tense, it's not professor Collins they're talking about.

"It has to be Christian Grey."

"Is he single?"

"I don't think he is." I say to them. Steele, what are you doing?! "I think he's gay."

"Ow, what a shame." They same and move their gaze forward again.

The headmaster starts to deliver his speech. He talked about education, the professors and the honor he feels to be the headmaster of the university. I see Christian searching the crowd and after a few moments are eyes meet. He looks at me intensely and gives me a small smile. I squirm in my seat hoping that nobody noticed that that's he smiled at me because I really hate being the center of attention. Even though I feel my cheeks slowly becoming very red, I'm still hypnotized by his starring, and I can't look away. The girls who I talked with before looked at me with wondering eyes but I avoid them at all cost.

Everyone starts clapping her hands when Katherine Kavanagh enters the stage. I even hear Jose screaming in the background as if he was at a concert instead of a graduation. The headmaster goes back to his seat and Kate now stands by the podium in front of thousands of people. She looks very confident and gives the crowd big smile right before she starts speaking. Kate has everyone listening entrancingly right from the beginning. She makes people laugh and she makes people think. Right at that moment, I'm so proud of Kate that it makes me forget the Christian Grey is right behind her.

My gaze wonders back to Christian who looks at Kate with a surprised expression. I think it is over her eloquence. What if Kate would've been the one to interview Christian? Would it be her that would've gone out with him? Beautiful Kate and beautiful Christian, what a sight to behold. Suddenly, I'm feeling very insecure. I could've been like the girls sitting beside me admiring the amazing man that is Christian Grey.

Kate ends her speech with a dash and she is rewarded with a standing ovation. My heart aches with the previous thought that I now can't get out of my head. I clap frantically and give her two thumbs up when we get eye contact. She gives me a big smile and a wink.

The headmaster walks towards the podium to present the next speaker - Christian Grey. He accounts all the achievements he has amassed despite his young age: CEO for his own very successful company, a man that has worked from the bottom all the way up. Christian stands up looking arrogant and relaxed. He lets his gaze wander through the crowd and I hear the girls beside me sigh and look at him dreaming eyes. He starts talking and the public immediately quiets down.

"I am profoundly grateful and touched by the honor that has been shown to me by the university administration at Washington State University today. It gives me the opportunity to talk about the impressive work carried out by the University's environmental science faculty. Our goal is to develop viable and ecologically sustainable farming methods in third world countries. Our ultimate goal is to eradicate hunger and poverty worldwide. Over one billion people, mostly in sub-Saharan Africa, South Asia, and Latin America live below the poverty line. Agriculture is no longer working in these parts of the world, which has resulted in the environmental and social devastation. I know myself what it means to go hungry. For me, this is a personal issue ... "

Wait what? That's why he is so adamant about food, he really wants the world fed. I try to remember what Kate wrote in her article, he was adopted when he was four. This has to be the time before his adoption. What kind of life did he live before he was adopted? Christian, one of the most generous, caring men I have ever met has suffered and gone hungry. Suddenly everyone starts applauding making me turn my attention back to reality. I join the crowd even though I I didn't hear his other half of the speech. He smiles at little and nods his head as a way of saying thank you.

The headmaster stands up again starts the heartbreakingly slow process of handing out diplomas. While the line slowly starts moving forward, I feel that my heart starts beating faster, and the nerves that I thought I had under control flare up. I'M GRADUATING TODAY. The girls that sat beside me are now giggling as they approach Christian.

"Congratulations, Miss Steele." he says to me while he takes my hand and presses it gently. I feel a current pass through my body, making me warm and tingly. I give him a big smile. "It's a very special day."

"It is indeed." I say to him while he gives me my diploma.

"Is something wrong with your phone?" he asks me quickly.

"No, I forgot to charge it yesterday. Why?"

Our conversation is cut short when the girl behind us clears her throat, giving us an not so discreet signal that we're holding up the whole queue. I walk back to my seat and wonder what he could've sent to my phone. It takes an hour more for the ceremony to be done. Kate comes over while I'm waiting for my row to move from their seats.

"Christian wants to talk to you." she yells. The two girls turn around and stare at me with open mouths. "He sent me over." she continues.

"Your speech was amazing." I say to Kate honestly.

"I know!" she beams with pride over her achievement. "It went better than I thought it would! Are you coming? He can be very obstinate."

I just nod. I turn around and look for Ray in the audience when we get eye-contact I show him five fingers, to say that I need five minutes. Ray nods and gives me an okay. Kate leads me to a corridor behind the podium where I see Christian talking with some men, most likely professors of other fields that want some funding. He looks up and sees me.

"Excuse me, gentlemen." I hear him say. He comes over and gives Kate a big smile.

"Thank you." he says to Kate and before she even gets to respond to his comment, he leads me away to a room that seems to be a men's locker room. He looks around, checking if somebody is in here with us and the proceeds with locking the door. I look at him confused.

"Why haven't you answered any of my text messages or phone calls?" he asks me.

"I told you, my phone died and I forgot to charge it." I answer him. He looks at me not really believing my answer. "Whats going on, Christian?"

"I've been worried about you." he says. I'm confused.

"You pretty much followed me home Christian. What could've happened in that short amount of time?" I ask him carefully.

"I don't know. I just couldn't shake the feeling that something had happened and when you didn't answer your phone..."

"Thank you for your concern but nothing happened." I tell him with a small smile that I hope eases his mind. I try to change the subject. "I liked your speech. Helped me understand you a bit more."

He runs his fingers through his hair despondently. "I don't want to talk about that now." he says. He takes a big breath and takes a few steps back. "Are you going to mingle?"

"I don't know. It depends on what the others want to do."

He nods. " Then we should go. We don't want to keep your family waiting."

I start walking towards the door when I feel him grasp my arm and pull me against him. He gives me a soft kiss on the lips. "Congratulations, Ana." Christian says and then lets me go. I give him a big smile.

"Thanks," I say, and walk out into the crowd of people to meet my family.

* * *

It turns out that everyone wants to stay and mingle in the big party tent the university has set up. They're handing out the cheap champagne, that tastes too sweet and is lukewarm, to all the people attending the mingle. Classical music is playing discreetly in the background, but I doubt that people can actually hear it. There are people everywhere - some that I have seen before but the majority of them I have never seen before.

"How does it feel to have graduated, Ana?" Jose asks me, Kate is off somewhere looking for her parents. Jose is holding Gavin's hand while they both look dapper in suits that fit them perfectly. Gavin has on a sophisticated marine blue suit while Jose has opted for a checked suit in a soft brown color. They complement each other perfectly.

"Surreal," I tell them. "I'm kind of tired of studying. I just want to start doing something new" I continue. Both nod understandingly.

"I know what you mean," Gavin says. "It feels like I've been studying to be a lawyer for ages." he sighs.

"But, next year we will be celebrating that Gavin passed the bar." Jose says proudly and gives Gavin a kiss on his cheek. They both look so happy. I give them a beaming smile.

"Where's my dad?" I ask them. "I haven't seen him since he walked off to fetch some more champagne." Their heads shake while they tell me that they haven't seen him either. My eyes wander around the party tent looking for the proud, taciturn man that is my dad. I catch a glimpse of my dad laughing with Christian by the bar. They both look so relaxed and content with each others company, if I did not know better I would think that Christian is trying to steal my father.

"Seems like they get along," Gavin says. "I didn't know that they knew each other." he continues to say sounding confused.

"They don't," I say. "They met each other the other day for the first time."

"When?" Jose says.

"When I got Kate's flu. After Christian had heard that I was sick he came over with chicken soup, in the meanwhile, Kate had rung my dad and told him that I was sick so he also came over to take care of me. That's how they met."

Both men look at me confounded, that was not the answer they had expected to hear from me. I just smile and walk towards Ray and Christian that still haven't seen me coming.

"What are you two laughing about?" I ask them. They look up and when they see me standing in front of them they seem to laugh harder. I scrunch up my forehead in confusion but I feel that I still have a smile on my lips.

"You," Ray says finally. He hands over his digital camera. He took pictures of me earlier with my gown. It's one of the photos when I make a horrendous face because I'm so uncomfortable in front of the camera. Somehow I've managed to flare up my nostrils, scrunch up my forehead and stick out my tongue at the same time. I look ridiculous, I laugh.

"I see why." I say laughing. We walk back to Gavin and Jose with more sparkling wine and we all start talking.

"Ana!" I turn around and find Ethan Kavanagh. He takes me carefully into his arms so that I don't spill any of the wine I'm holding. He makes a little twirl while holding me up and I can't help but giggle. Dad and Christian eyes Ethan suspiciously.

"Congratulations, Steele!" Ethan says to me with sparkling green eyes. His blond, fluffy hair is sexy. He is as handsome as Kate is beautiful. It's something in their genetics.

"What a surprise! I thought that you were in Europe! When did you come home?" I say to Ethan surprised.

"I came home last week! I wanted to surprise Kate on her graduation." he says conspiratorially.

"Aw, that's so sweet of you." I smile at him. "Have you met her yet?" I ask.

"Yes, I just wanted to surprise you too." he says.

"That you did!" I tell him. "Well, this is my dad Ray and my..." I'm lost for words on what to call Christian.

"I see you have met Ana's new boyfriend Christian Grey." I hear Kate say behind me to Ethan.

Ethan looks at me surprised and then to Christian. "Boyfriend?" Ethan says removing his arms from around my shoulders.

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Kavanagh." Christian says to him confidently and totally unaffected of Kate's disclosure. He now stands beside me and puts an arm around my waist, like he is trying to prove something to Ethan.

"So, how long have you been dating?" Ethan asks us.

"For a couple of weeks." Christian says with a small smile. He looks at me and gives me a peck on the cheek. Kate has a sly look on her face. She did this on purpose.

"I'm happy for you guys." Ethan says with a smile, but somehow it sounds and feels fake.

"I think our parents are waving us over. See you later guys." Kate says and they soon disappear.

"Why did that feel so awkward?" I murmur to myself.

"Because it was." Jose says laughing. I don't really understand what's going on. "Ana, darling, for being so smart you really are dumb sometimes." he says looking at me empathetically. All eyes looking at me.

I'm just about to respond to Jose's comment when a photographer asks for a picture of Christian. I step aside but Christian won't let me. The photographer looks baffled and joyous as he takes our picture. I wonder how much a picture of Christian with an unknown girl is worth. _Probably more than you think_ , my unconscious sneers.

"Thank you, Mr. Grey," the photographer says. "And..."

"Anastasia Steele," Christian tells him.

* * *

Jose, Gavin, Christian, Ray and I went to a restaurant after the mingle. The walls are painted in different colors - one is painted in a warm orange, the other is in a crisp white, one in a bright, light blue and lastly one in dark brown. There are booths alongside the walls and tables with different sized chairs. You would think that having such an eclectic design, that it would be messy but it all goes together perfectly. It makes the restaurant more unique and cozy.

We're sitting in a booth, sharing basically everything they had on the menu and drinking some Coronas with lime. We've talked about everything at this point - politics, the economy, movies (turns out that Christian doesn't really watch that many) and past experiences. The guys are talking about football and baseball when I get a text message from Kate.

 ***Dinner with my parents extremely awkward. Wish that I was with you guys.***

*Are you okay?*

 ***Dad is arguing with Ethan about his career choice. He has chosen to become a psychologist and dad wants him to follow his footsteps. Apparently, I'm not enough.***

*Kate you're more than enough. Don't listen to your Dad. You know he can be kind of harsh.*

 ***I know but is hard sometimes to not take what his saying personally.***

*You are one of the most intelligent, beautiful and caring people I know. Don't let words that your dad said out of anger bring you down on your special day.*

 ***I love you, Ana.***

*Me too. See you at home.*

Poor Kate, she has told me stories about her childhood. Her parents, or rather her dad, puts a lot of pressure on his kids. They are always expected to always be on top, no matter the situation. Her dad's solution to every problem is to throw money at it. Kate gets everything she points at from her dad but they don't have a personal relationship at all. She's a bit closer to her mom, but not that much. The only member that she's close to is Ethan. At this point, I'm glad that I grew up with Ray.

"So, Ana have you found a job yet?" Gavin asks me. I look up from my phone and right into Christian's. He is waiting for an answer.

"No, I haven't. I'm still waiting for them to get in touch." I tell everyone.

"Christian, do you have any contacts in the publishing world?" Jose asks him. I look at him horrified, I can't believe he just asked that. "Ana, why are you so against Christian helping you?" Jose asks when he notices my gaze.

"Because I want to get the job based off my merit and not because of the people I know or think that I'm sleeping with." I say candidly. Ray looks very uncomfortable and Christian chokes on his beer he starts coughing. I look at him concerned.

"I understand that, honey, but Christian could just point you in the right direction." Jose continues. "A recommendation is based on merit. I doubt Christian would say to an associate 'Hey, I think you should hire Anastasia Steele because she is damn good in bed.'" Gavin looks at Jose with a look that says shut up.

"I know that! But a recommendation from Christian will be biased - we have a personal relationship, we're dating. And by tomorrow it will be a known fact because the photographer will definitely sell the photo to the Seattle Times or something like that, and therefore our relationship will be known by the public."

"Exactly!" Jose says. "Everyone will know either way, right? What makes you think your future boss won't see the foto in the paper? Why not let him help you." Jose argues.

"I don't want people to think that I'm using him, that I'm some sort of gold-digger because I'm not." I say quietly.

All the men - especially Christian, look at me with wonder. I look down, avoiding their looks, and continue eating. The food really is delicious.

"Are you going to eat that?" I ask Jose and steal a few of his fries.

* * *

Gavin and Jose went to their apartment after dinner with a promise to come back the next day to help me and Kate move. Dad was heading home tomorrow, early in the morning. So, he decided to take my car back to my apartment, when Christian, in turn, promised my dad that he would give me a ride back to the apartment.

"I know that you're not a gold-digger, Anastasia." Christian says when we're alone.

"I hope so." I say looking anywhere but at him.

"Ana, look at me." he says. "I'm very good at reading people, it's why I'm so good at what I do. I know that you're not a gold-digger."

I nod because I don't know how to respond to that. He leans down and gives me a soft kiss on the lips that slowly grows in intensity. I tentatively taste his lips with my lounge. I part from him, embarrassed when I feel somebody watching us.

"People are watching." I whisper with my eyes closed.

"Let them watch." he whispers back and kisses me again. I laugh a little but that stops as soon as his lips meet mine. They're softest lips I've ever felt. The slight stubble on his cheeks that scrapes softly against my own is slowly igniting a fire inside of me. I back out again and look into his eyes.

"It's getting late." I tell him. He nods and stands up. I notice his tie again - it's gray, with a minuscule checkered pattern in a slightly darker thread."Nice tie, it suits you."

"Thank you, Miss Steele." Christian says to me. He leads me outside and to his car when I notice that Taylor isn't there.

"Where's Taylor?" I ask him.

"Doing errands." he answers simply. He opens the passenger door to his very fancy car and then proceeds to sit at the driver's seat.

"Do you want to choose the music?" Christian asks.

"Sure."

He hands over his phone and I get the chance to check out his playlist. He has a very extensive playlist with a broad variety of genres and artists. The only music I can't find is Indie - I wonder why. I go simple and choose Ballade pour Adeline. I lay back and relax.

"I have a surprise for you." Christian says excitedly when we're by my apartment. I look at him suspiciously. He leads me to a beautiful, silver car and then he stretches out his arms. Christian expression says "Tada!".

"It's for you. Congratulations on your graduation." Christian says. He looks like a little kid in a candy store.

"That's a car," I say to him dumbfounded. He has bought a car for me... A brand new one. On one side I'm thankful for the car, but on the other, I'm furious that he bought me a car when he knew how I felt about the books he gave me in the first place. This is even trickier to turn down than the books. How should I put this for him so that he understands? I sigh.

"You're car is very old and quite frankly a deathtrap. I would never forgive myself if you got yourself in a car accident when it's so easy for me to rectify the problem..."

I really don't know what to say. I just stand there silently by the shiny, silver car.

"I told Ray." He tells me. "He thought it was a great idea." Of course, he did, he would've bought me new car years ago if his economy would've allowed it.

"It's too much Christian." I tell him.

"It's a present, Anastasia. Can't you just say thank you and move on?" Christian asks irritated.

"You know that it's too much and I love Wanda."

"Not for my peace of mind."

I sigh. "I will only accept this car if you let me pay you for it in the future." I say to him determinedly.

"Absolutely not." he says sounding disgusted.

"Then I will not accept your gift. Good night, Christian." I give him a kiss on the cheek and turn around to walk towards the apartment. I'm almost by the door when I hear him say. "Wait, okay. I'll loan you the car indefinitely." he says.

I watch him closely. "Okay. I'll accept your deal."

"You are a challenge, Anastasia Steele." he says and kisses me passionately goodbye.


	14. Chapter 14 - The Meet-Up

**Chapter 14 - The Meet-Up**

The last few hours have been spent unpacking all the boxes in our new apartment. I'm putting all the utensils and the china in their new home while Kate starts packing up our toiletries and putting them where they belong. Jose and Elliot are mounting the TV on the wall while Gavin is assembling some new furniture that we got from Ikea. _Staying Alive_ by the Bee Gees is blasting through the portable speakers that Jose brought with him. The catchy lyrics makes everyone sing, especially Elliot, who is screaming out the chorus. I'm almost surprised that our neighbors haven't complained yet. Christian wasn't able to come over and help today, something about a conference call from Taiwan and his sister coming home from Paris.

When I'm done filling up the cabinets and drawers with everything I go and help Gavin. He's assembling our new, bigger sofa and it seems like he is struggling. Gavin isn't the best at building things, actually, he has no talent for it whatsoever. He knows it but he refuses to admit it. It always ends with Jose finishing what Gavin started. Jose, not so surprisingly, is a very good handyman. He spent his summers when he was younger helping out his who is the electrician/carpeting business. Jose Senior, Jose's dad, co-owns his business with a carpenter named Bob.

Gavin and Jose are admiring their work after they just connected the satellite system with our TV. Gavin, Kate and I sit on the sofa that has just been finished and giggle at the men's skills with a drill. I think Kate and Gavin are slightly turned on right now by the looks on their faces. I think it looks kind of weird to have a flat screen TV against a brick wall but I guess that we will grow used to it over time.

"You see, baby? It was easy." Elliot says to Kate. She is just about to become a wet puddle on our brand new sofa. I roll my eyes at them.

"Gave, we have to do this when we get our own apartment here next year," Jose says to Gavin while he sits down beside him. Gavin puts an arm around Jose's broad shoulders.

"Will do whatever you want," Gavin says to Jose with so much love in his eyes. After everything, Gavin has gone through he really deserves to be happy with Jose. I don't think I've ever met a couple more suitable for each other than those two. They give each other a quick peck on the lips.

"Guys, should we order pizza?" I ask. We haven't eaten in a very long time and I bet that I'm not the only one starving. "And if so, how many should we get and what kinds?"

"I'm down!" Elliot says. "I want my own pizza - pepperoni without the cheese." he continues. I scrunch up my forehead, pizza without cheese? That's the main and arguably the most important ingredient. I let it slide because I do also have very specific taste in food.

"I want the one with four kinds of cheeses," Kate says. Elliot looks at her with slight disgust. "What's wrong?" Kate asks him.

"That's disgusting. Cheese isn't good raw let alone melted on a pizza." Elliot says.

"Elliot, you're lactose intolerant, that's why you don't like cheese." Kate rolls her eyes at him. I laugh at their banter, that does explain the cheese thing.

"Aren't there pills you can take that can alleviate some of the symptoms caused by your intolerance?" I ask Elliot curious, I think that I read about it somewhere.

"Yes, there is. But, I still don't like cheese," he says to me, the last part he directed at Kate.

"I would like a Hawaii. You know a pizza with pineapples on top?" Jose says.

"I want one of those too," Gavin says.

I nod and step away for a moment ordering all the pizzas at the nearest pizza place. I want a regular pizza but with feta cheese on top. I look back to them from where I stand in the corner and I think to myself I'm one lucky girl to have them all in my life.

* * *

"I would like to stay longer but I should get going. My sister came home from Paris yesterday, so, today it's mandatory to attend the Grey family dinner." Elliot says to us. Gavin and Jose left a while ago to head back home.

Kate looks disappointed. "Will you swing by afterward?" she asks him hopefully, almost sounding clingy. So, unlike Kate, the confident and adventurous woman she was before she met him - she must really like him.

I go to the kitchen and start putting away the dishes into the dishwasher and start fiddling with some boxes. Those two are going to make out at any moment and I don't want a front row seat for that.

"I will try to get away." he promises her.

"I'll follow you down." Kate smiles.

"Bye, Ana," Elliot says.

"Bye, Elliot. Say hi to Christian from me by the way."

"I will." he smiles.

Elliot and Christian are as different as night and day. Elliot is very charming, open and affectionate... almost too affectionate at times with Kate. Those two can't keep their hands off each other - which at times can be quite embarrassing for those who are around, and I have to admit that I'm jealous about that. I'm well aware that the reason why Christian and I haven't been intimate is mostly, if not completely, my fault. For the past few weeks, ever since I met him again in his office, I've been filled with this desire for him. Every time he looks at me and gives me one of his rare, shy smiles it makes my insides feel light, like the metaphorical butterflies everyone keeps talking about. Not to mention, when that man touches me, I feel suddenly very warm and hot with a feeling that the thing that could ever cool me off is to take off all of my clothes and preferably his.

Kate returns after twenty minutes. We sit down on the couch and watch over the sea of boxes that we still haven't unpacked. Kate's dad knows what he was doing when he bought this apartment - it's not too big or too small. It has three bedrooms and a big living room with windows facing Pike Market Place. The layout of the place is minimalistic with its walls made out of red brick and wood floors. The kitchen was recently renovated and has a modern and simple feel. And an added bonus is that apartment is in the middle of Seattle which we both like a lot. We put on the TV and settle for some reruns of _Friends_.

At eight o'clock on the dot, there's a ring on the intercom. Kate stands up and to see who's at the door. My heart stops for a moment with excitement. Isn't Christian supposed to be at a dinner with his family?

"A package to Miss Steele and Miss Kavanagh." the intercom says.

I feel the disappointment rush through my vanes. It isn't Christian.

"Second floor." Kate simply says.

The mailman just stares at Kate when she opens the door. She's just standing there with a t-shirt and jeans and she stills manages to render the man speechless. He is holding a basket with a bottle of champagne. On the small handle, there is a small helicopter balloon that floats around. The package has to be from Christian.

Kate smiles at him and closes the door in the man's face and then proceeds to read the note in the small basket.

 _Ladies,_

 _Good luck in your new home._

 _Christian Grey_

Kate shakes her head. "Why can't he just write 'from Christian'? And why the helicopter balloon?" she asks.

"Christian flew me to Seattle on our first date," I tell her. She stares at me quietly and I have to admit that I love these moments - when Katherine Kavanagh is so amazed that she's speechless. These moments happen so rarely that I make sure that I absorb every second of it. "He has a helicopter that he flies himself." I continue. I sound very proud.

"Of course, Moneybags has a helicopter. Why haven't you told me that?" Kate says to me with an accusing look. For a moment I thought that she was angry but then I saw her smile.

"I just haven't had the time to tell you. Everything has been so overwhelming lately." I say to her.

"I understand that. How does everything feel?"

"Good, I'm happy," I tell her honestly. I doubt that I have ever felt this happy. I'm almost too happy. "You and Elliot?"

"Ana," she sighs dreamingly. "I really like him. I really do and I'm so afraid that he will break my heart," she confesses.

"Elliot seems like a good guy that really likes you, Kate. Not at all the kind of guy you usually like." she usually goes for the complete douchebag that treats her like dirt kind of guy.

"I know, that's what's scaring me," she says. "But, he does have a past." she looks sad.

"What do you mean?" I ask her confused.

"He was a playboy," Kate says. "Or, we haven't defined our relationship yet, so, I guess that he technically still is."

"Kate, so where you," I tell her. "That doesn't mean anything. Everyone is entitled to a past, that was before you." when those words come out of my mouth I realize the truth behind it. I have been judging Christian, at least a little bit, for his lifestyle. But, that was before me and the "lifestyle" as he calls it doesn't scare me is just something that I potentially need to be eased into. _Pfft, you haven't even had sex yet, Steele_ , my subconscious sneers.

"I know, but, I can't help but worry that he will wake up one day and decide that that part of my past is too much for him."

"You need to talk to him," I say. "To me, it looks like he really likes you."

She gives me a weak nod and the apartment becomes silent. I give Kate a glass of champagne and then pour one to myself. I give her a big hug after we have taken a sip.

"I'm scared that my lack of experience is going to screw up my relationship with Christian," I confess to Kate. "That I'll do something wrong." I look away to the wall.

"Elliot says that Christian doesn't have much experience," Kate says to me. "So, you'll screw up together. Ana, But, that happens to everyone even those with more experience. Hell, I bet that couples that have been married for 30 years still screw up sometimes. Don't worry if it is meant to be then you'll work it out."

"But, Kate I'm not like you," I say to her. "I'm not beautiful, I don't have my life figured out and I don't know what I can offer him. You know? He is kind and very good-looking. I bet there are beautiful girls that throw themselves at him all the time. I don't really understand what he sees in me."

Kate looks at me furiously. "I don't understand how everyone but you can see your beauty. You are not just beautiful on the outside, Ana, you are beautiful on the inside as well and that shows. You're like a fricking saint - an intelligent, erudite and beautiful saint and my best friend. And I swear to God that if he hurts you I will crush his nuts with a nutcracker." Kate says looking very serious.

I can't help but laugh Kate's threat. "You know the same goes for Elliot," I tell her.

"Thanks, Sweetie, but, you wouldn't be able to do it. You're too good for it." she laughs.

"Hey, I would do it for you." I protest.

Kate blinks and squishes my hand gently. "I guess that's why we're best friends."

* * *

Kate and I are still watching TV when the intercom buzzes. The apartment is dark, except for a few candles that we lighted up after our girl-talk. Christian and I have sent a few texts to each other throughout the day but I haven't heard from him since the afternoon when I thanked him for the champagne and the small helicopter that apparently is named Charlie Tango. Kate has fallen asleep on the couch, so, I tentatively walk towards the intercom wondering who would be here this late at night.

"Hello?" I ask with a low voice trying not to wake up Kate.

"Ana? It's Elliot." I buzz him in and unlock the front door. In that moment I made a decision to go over to Christians apartment and surprise him. That way Kate and Elliot can have the apartment for themselves and I get to see Christian. I wait for Elliot to come into the apartment before I go to my room and pack a bag.

"Hi, how are you doing?" Elliot asks when he walks in.

"Good," I tell him. "I was thinking of going over to your brother's house."

"Oh, you don't have to leave if you don't want to," he says worriedly. "we will be quiet." he says with a blink.

"I don't want to risk it." I laugh.

Elliot looks away and looks suddenly nervous and uncomfortable. I hear him take a deep breath.

"Ana, can you do me a favor?" Elliot says.

"Sure, anything," I tell him.

"Don't break my brother's heart. I don't know how much he has told you about himself but he has had a rough past and he deserves to have someone that cares. He really likes you, I can tell, and that you like him too. So, please, be patient with him and don't break his heart."

My surprise makes me blink a few times. I really don't know what to say or how to say it. Anyone can see how much Elliot cares about his little brother and the fact that he talked to me makes me somehow like him more than before.

"I would never break his heart intentionally," I tell him. He looks into my eyes, like he is assessing how honest I'm being, and then nods and gives me a big smile.

"Good to know," Elliot says.

"Elliot, can I ask you two questions?" I ask him. Suddenly I'm nervous about what I'm going to ask him. I hope I'm not overstepping my boundaries.

"Including the one you just asked me?" he smiles. I shake my head. "I guess it's only fair."

"What do you feel about Kate's past?" I ask him and look worriedly towards the sofa. Kate is still soundly asleep.

"Uhm..." he starts and then he runs his fingers through his hair. It has to be a Grey family trait because Christian also does this when his nervous. "I'm not going to lie, it bothers me a little bit but I wouldn't change her. My mom says that our experiences make us who we are, and I agree. I wouldn't change anything about Kate, I like her just the way she is." he says looking at anything but me. He runs his fingers through his hair again.

I nod and pat his shoulder. "I hope I haven't overstepped my boundaries," I tell him. "Kate has been worried about it and..."

"She has?" he asks me astounded.

"Yes." I nod. "Well, I should get going." I turn around and start walking towards my room when I hear Elliot say. "Wait, you haven't asked me your second question."

I continue walking while I say. "I'll save it for next time."

* * *

I'm standing in Christian's building's lobby debating if this is a good idea or not. I don't even know the code for the penthouse. The doorman watches me closely, up and down, evaluating me. The man staring gives me the creeps. I take out my phone and text Christian.

*Is it okay if I come over?*

I walk back and forth in the room a few times. _Why am I so nervous?_ I hear someone clear his throat, my eyes go to the doorman who is staring at me now. He is slightly overweight and has a uniform that is a little too small for his broad shoulders. His complexion is slightly tanned like he recently came back from a holiday. His eyes are small and shaped like almonds. Ted, the name that was sewn in gold thread on his suit jacket, had a plain appearance. He stands up from his seat and looks down at me. He gives the impression of being a bully.

"Excuse me, who are you here to see?" he asks me sounding very skeptical. "Ehm,.." I say nervously. The man smiles like he is enjoying seeing me this uncomfortable. "Christian Grey," I tell him sounding more insecure than I should, I don't know what is but the man standing in front of me makes my skin crawl.

He laughs out loud. "Is that so?" he asks with one bushy eyebrow raised. "What's your name?"

"Anastasia Steele." The man looks down and searches my name in the computer in front of him. I feel my cell phone vibrate in my hand. Christian replied.

 ***Of course, are you alright? I will come and get you right away. Where are you?***

*I'm already in your lobby.*

The man makes exaggerated sounds as he searches the screen for my name, making it very obvious that he doesn't think that my name will be on whatever list he is reading from. I see him smile broadly and then looks at me condescendingly. I try to go past him to the elevator but he stops me.

"Where do you think you're going? You're not on the list, Anastasia," he says my name mockingly. " Honey... stop stalking him, it's pathetic," he says with a sickly sweet voice and then proceeds with taking a dramatic, deep breath.

I can't believe what he is telling me, I'm so shocked that I don't know what so say in my defense. In a way, this total stranger is somehow hitting one of my biggest insecurities. I feel my eyes starting to well up with tears and my heart starts pounding faster. I feel pathetic for not standing up for myself right now, I feel my hands shake with anger. Still, I'm speechless and can't seem to get a single word out of my mouth. He continues his monolog.

"Do yourself a favor and leave." He spits out looking at me with a weird mixture of hatred and pity. I open my mouth and close it quickly, nothing comes out.

"Why does Miss. Steele need to leave?" he asks. His voice is ice cold and his whole demeanor is threatening. I don't even know what feel right know.

"She's not on your list of approved guests, Sir," Ted says confidently, convinced that he hadn't done anything wrong. "So, I was just leading her out of the building."

Christian nods slowly. "It didn't occur to you to call my security and ask if she was expected?" he asks.

"No, because she wasn't on the list."

"I asked you a question and that wasn't the answer to it." Christian repeats calmly.

"No, it didn't occur to me." he says sounding a bit more unsure than before.

Christian takes a deep breath. "So, you just decided to throw out my girlfriend?"

"Girlfriend?" he asks looking pale. "I didn't know she was your girlfriend, Sir. It was an honest mistake."

Christian shakes his head. "You're fired," he says to him like it was a trifle. Christian takes my hand and leads me towards the elevator. He takes my bag and puts it over his shoulder. We're almost by the doors when he screams.

"Who do you think you are?! You can't fire me, I don't work for you." Ted screams as he walks towards us.

"No, that's true but you'd be surprised at what I can do," Christian says with a smug expression on his face. I see in my peripheral vision how Ted is about to push Christian from behind his back. Instinctively, I stop and stand in the way for his push which almost makes me fall on top of Christian. Before I even knew what I had done my fist kissed his nose, making a loud smack. I must've hit him pretty hard because judging by Ted's reaction and blood dripping down his face.

"You bitch," Ted screams at me, holding his nose. A few scarlet red drops land on the ground. Christian's walks firmly towards him with his arm raised, like he was going to hit him. I take his arm and stand in front of him. I take one of my hands and lay it on his cheek to make him look at me. His eyes express all the pulsating anger that he feels right now. I shake my head.

"Please, can we go?" I whisper to him. A few tears running down my face. Not really sure what they're for - the pain that I feel in my hand or just from the tension that I have in my body. Christian looks at me and then at Ted.

"Good luck finding a new job, asshole," Christian says to him. We walk into the elevator and the last thing I see of Ted is his bent over figure as he bleeds from his nose. The only sounds filling the silence is the muffled elevator music.

"Are you okay?" Christian asks.

I nod. "Are you?" I look at him. Christian looks worried as he takes my hand in his. I can't help but wince, it's a bit sore. He looks at me skeptically. "Obviously, I've been better," I tell him. I move closer towards him. "How are you?"

"I'm not the one who just hit a guy. I should take you to the hospital," he mutters. He looks sad like this is somehow his fault.

"Hey, this isn't your fault," I say to him. I look into his gray eyes and I see the scared little boy that I saw when I first met him. Something drew me closer towards him and I kissed him. I softly molded my lips after his and kissed him. It didn't take long for Christian to put his hand on my hips and press me against his muscular body. I put my hands on his head and pull his hair slightly. All the pain that I felt in my hand now magically gone. One of his hands works their way up my body to my neck where I feel him caress it gently. This movement works as some kind of fire-fluid: my internal temperature is now rocket high and the feeling of wanting to take off all my clothes is now back. Christian nibs on my lower lip tenderly. A moan escapes my mouth and I feel him smile against my mouth. We both take a deep breath and right then the elevator doors slide up.

"Christian, please sleep with me." I hear myself say almost desperately. I feel my cheeks flush rapidly. _Why am I so embarrassed?_

He looks at me surprised. "Are you sure?" he asks me seriously.

"Yes," I whisper because that's what I really want right now. This man has awoken something in me that I didn't even know that I had. Christian smiles triumphantly and leads me quickly to his bedroom when the elevator doors open.

His room almost seems a lot bigger that it did the last time I was here. I'm trembling like an aspen leaf. This is the day that I loose my virginity with none other than Christian Grey. I breath short, jagged breaths and I can't take my eyes from him. He takes off his watch and puts it on his bedside table, that matches his bed. Then he proceeds with taking off the jacket that he apparently was wearing and hanging it on a chair. All that remains of his clothing is a white t-shirt and a pair dark washed jeans. He is so fucking hot. His bronze toned hair is ruffled after my fingers ran through it before and his gray, sparkling eyes are challenging me. He takes off his shoes and then proceeds to bend down and take off his socks.

"I assume that you're not on the pill."

I blink a few times at his statement. "I thought so." He opens up the top drawer in his dresser and takes out a box of condoms. He looks at me eagerly. He walks towards me looking confident and nervous at the same time. He makes my heart want to explode. My blood is rushing through my veins and I feel myself getting wet.

"Should we take off your jacket?" he asked softly before he gently to get off me. It puts it on the chair with his jacket.

"Do you have any idea how much I want you, Ana Steele?" He whispers. I'm barely breathing and I can't still take my eyes off of him. I caress his cheek. The muscles in the most secret, dark part of me clench in the most exquisite way. I close my eyes when he leans forward and kisses me. His lips are soft but demanding and with slow, steady movements takes control over my mouth. He starts unbuttoning my shirt he places soft kisses down my jaw, throat, and chest. He takes off my shirt and lets it fall onto the floor. He watches me.

"Ana, you have so beautiful skin. I want to kiss every inch of it." I feel my cheeks reddened. At this point, I will don anything that he wants of me. I take out the elastic from hair and let it fall down my shoulders. He pulls me closer towards his body and hugs me tight. One of his hands is in my hair, the other one caresses my back and lands on my behind. He squeezes it slightly and presses me against his hips were I can feel his erection.

I moan again - I can't help it. I can't hold back all the feelings that are flowing inside me. I want him so much. My hands land on his upper arms and I can feel his biceps. He is surprisingly strong, muscular. Slowly, I lift my hands towards his hair. He moans and pushes me backward until I can feel the bed against my the hollows of my knees. Suddenly, he goes down on his knees. He kisses my tummy and his hands start unbuttoning my pants and pulling down the zipper very slowly. Then he pulls them down completely until I'm in my panties. Now I'm standing in front of him in just my underwear. His face is practically glowing from his excitement. He pushes me down onto the bed.

Christian takes off his shirt and pants before he slowly claims up onto the bed with me in a way that reminds me of a lion in mid-hunt. His face is right next to mine when he whispers "Please, don't touch my chest and my back." I swallow a gulp of air and nod while I look into his captivating eyes.

I feel my bra poking me and holding my strained breathing. So, I lift my torso a bit and unclasp my bra and take it off. It feels much better. Christians gaze turns downward to them. He starts sucking on one of them. I moan loudly and I feel sensation travel to my groan and intensify there. _Please!_ My body screams but I don't really now what it is asking for. He continues with his tantalizing treatment bringing me closer and closer to the brink. After what felt like an eternity I explode underneath him. My whole body is vibrating. _Now I know what everyone is talking about_ , I think to myself. He gives me a big, deep kiss.

A hand starts moving down my body towards my sex. He lets a finger go beneath my underwear and starts making slow circular motions - _there_ , and without warning, he puts in a finger. I moan loudly.

"Oh, your so wet," he says. He sits up suddenly taking of his own boxers and my panties. Now, we're both completely naked on the bed.

I can't help but stare at his hard-on. _Is that supposed to fit inside of me?!_ He puts on a condom and lays down on top of me. He looks at me in the eyes.

"Do you really want to do this?" he asks.

"Please", I quiver.

"Part your legs", he commands quietly and the proceeds to penetrate me.

"Ah!" I scream. It doesn't hurt like some people said it would, it just feels strange but very, very good. Christian waits for a little while, giving me time to adjust before he starts moving again. After a while, I start meeting him half-way with the movements and soon it just feels natural. I'm consumed by the feelings inside me and the slow intensification of them. I feel myself starting to build up again. I won't last much longer.


	15. Chapter 15 - The Unexpected Visitor

Hello everyone,

I'm sorry it took quite a while to upload this chapter, I'll try to write and post more chapters in the future. I hope this doesn't disappoint. Also, I have a few ideas for other stories but I don't know if I should start writing them or just wait until I'm finished with this story. Let me know what you think!

Thank you for taking the time to read/review/follow/favorite this story it is greatly appreciated. I'm truly blown away by the great feedback I've received from day one!  
I hope you are having a great day/night wherever in the world you are. x

* * *

It's still dark outside when I wake up again. I have no idea how long I have slept. I stretch my arms and legs and feel how sore I am - wonderfully sore. My gaze moves across the bed when I realize that should've felt Christian when I stretched - he is not here. Christian is nowhere to be seen and I feel myself becoming a bit worried. _Where did he go?_ I think to myself. I push the cover of the bed aside and sit up and look down at sleeping city called, Seattle. It's truly a beautiful sight. It isn't until that I'm starting to get cold that I notice that I'm completely naked. I blush at the thoughts of Christian on top of me a few hours earlier. I stand up and search for something that I can cover myself up with when I hear the sound of music. A mellow, sad melody is coming from the piano. The melody sounds vaguely familiar - something that maybe Bach would play.

I find Christian's T-shirt that he had on last night and put it on. It just covers me. I look around looking for something else to put on so that I don't feel so naked. To be honest, at this point, I shouldn't care if I'm naked or not, but I do. He has seen every part of me by now it shouldn't be this embarrassing to walk around naked but that's how I feel. I find my used underwear by the bed but I cringe at the thought of putting dirty underwear on. Where's my overnight bag? I know that I packed new underwear for tomorrow, I hate not having clean underwear. I walk to the dresser in the room and open the first drawer, it's filled with boxer shorts. I grab one and quickly put it on, they are surprisingly comfortable - airy.

I find Christian playing the piano and being absolutely consumed by the music he is playing. He looks lost and sad, which accords with the music he is playing. He plays incredibly well, he is a very talented musician. I stop for a moment and just surrender to the music he is playing. Christian is sitting leaned over the piano almost protectively only wearing a pair of pajama trousers. The only source of light is an alone floor lamp standing by the instrument. The rest of the room is dark giving the appearance of him being in his own illuminated but sad bubble. I walk slowly and soundlessly to him, drawn by the sublime music. I stand by his side and watch his long fingers move across the keyboard pressing the right keys at exactly the right moment. He looks at me with burning gray eyes with an inscrutable expression.

"Sorry," I whisper. "I didn't mean to disturb you."

He looks at me worriedly, almost like he is hurting.

"I should be the one apologizing," he says in a low voice. Then he looks at me more closely. He scrunches up his face and I can see a shadow of a smile on his face. "What the hell are you wearing?" he asks.

"It was the first thing I found," I tell him. I feel my cheeks redden. "I couldn't find my bag in your room and I didn't want to walk around naked."

"I would've liked that very much," he says looking mischievous.

He stands up and lays an arm around my waist leading me towards the bedroom. I feel his mood change again. He is possibly the most mercurial man I have ever met. Scratch that - he IS the most mercurial man I have ever met.

"You should be sleeping," Christian says with a reproachful tone that gives me throwbacks to when my dad caught me under the covers with a flashlight reading late at night.

"So should you," I tell him. "That piece you played was so beautiful but sad. Melancholic." I ramble. I don't understand why he is in this mood. If I were him I would be playing happy melodies, why is he so sad? Was it something I did wrong? I thought he enjoyed the experience as much as I did but maybe he didn't. After all, it was my first time.

"It's time for you to go to bed," he commands. "You'll be exhausted tomorrow."

"I woke up because you weren't there."

"I have a hard time sleeping and I'm not used to sleeping with another person in my bed."

He has said that before but then again... "Where did your submissives sleep?" I ask him when we enter his bedroom.

I close my eyes and press them together. Steele, don't ask questions that you don't want the answer to, my subconscious growls. I really dread hearing his answer.

"They had their own bedroom upstairs," he says.

I nod not knowing what to say to that. I don't like him being this somber. I sit down on his bed facing the windows looking over the city.

"Christian, did I do something wrong?" I whisper softly, it's the only explanation I can find to his sudden mood change.

"What are you talking about?" Christian asks sharply. He walks towards me so that he is now blocking my view. He has broad shoulders and a slim waist. I can see that he has tensed up and seems to be very angry.

"Your sudden change in mood, it's the only explanation I can think of," I look down and set my gaze on my knees not daring to look at him directly.

"Forget it, don't think about it. Just go back to sleep." he growls with a scowl.

I sigh giving up the battle, I don't want to fight, especially not tonight. At approximately the same time Christian and I look onto the bed. There is blood on the sheets. How embarrassing! If he thought that I was lying before then here's his proof. I need to wash them tomorrow, I think to myself. I can't let his housekeeper wash them, what would she think of me?

"Now Mrs. Jones has something to think about," Christian mutters and turns towards me. He softly places a hand under my chin, making me look at him. He has an intense look in his eyes while he looks at my face. I realize now that I haven't seen his naked chest before this closely. My fingers itch and long to feel his skin under my fingertips but I resist the urge. I know it would hurt him and I have promised him I wouldn't touch him.

"Go to bed and I will join you shortly." I stare at him while he walks to the dresser where I took a pair of his underwear and opens a different drawer. He takes out a T-shirt and quickly puts it on hiding his perfect torso. I wonder if I ever will touch his chest and back. The thought dampens my mood a bit.

"Bed", he commands at last.

I lay down and try not to think about the blood too much. _It's natural,_ I tell myself. _But, still, disgusting_. The thought does not really take away any of the ickiness I feel about it. He lays down beside me and takes me into his arms, my back pressed to his front. He sniffs my hair and then proceeds to take a deep breath. I feel his body relax with every deep breath he takes.

"Sleep, sweet Anastasia," he mumbles and I close my eyes, but still feel a bit confused from what just happened. When I realize that I have just met the sorrowful side of Christian Trevelyan Grey.

* * *

I decide to make Christian breakfast and if he still hasn't woken up when I'm done to bring it to his bed. Somehow breakfast in bed doesn't seem like a thing Christian would ever do and that's why I decide to do it. Hopefully, it would bring up his mood again. I open up the fridge and stare at its contents for a while trying to figure out what to make. After rummaging around in his kitchen looking for some inspiration I find a loaf of bread in the cabinet, so I decide to make french toast. While the french toast is cooking in the oven and tea brewing (I still don't know how to use the coffee maker), I rinse, cut and put some fruit into small bowls. Finding a tray was next to impossible in his massive kitchen but, at last, I found one in a drawer under the kitchen island.

I realize that I'm still wearing Christian's clothes and it feels cozy. There's something about wearing Christian's clothes that make me feel protected and cozy - content. Walking towards Christian's room with a tray filled with food turns out to be more difficult than I thought. It's heavy and I'm not the most coordinated person there is, so I walk very slowly. Meanwhile, I pray to the gods that I don't spill the tea everywhere or worse that I drop the whole tray.

I put the tray down on the dresser and walk towards Christian. He is still sleeping and looking peaceful but something is wrong. He is sweating profusely and his cheeks are flushed. I put my hand on his forehead and feel the high temperature. He has a fever, a fairly high one too. Christian is sick, he probably has the flu. I told him that would happen, I think to myself. I caress his cheek and kiss his forehead.

"Christian, wake up," I whisper in his ear. I continue to kiss his eyelids and then move on to his cheeks. He grunts.

"You need to eat, and then I'll let you go back to sleep", I whisper again. I lean down and kiss him on his soft lips.

"Give me another kiss", I hear Christian croak. His voice is almost non-existent.

"Okay, sleeping beauty", I smile. "But this is not how it's supposed to work. It should be the other way around."

The kiss is sweet and short. I turn around and get the tray. Christian sits up in the bed still looking quite groggy. I put the tray in his lap and sit down beside him.

"How are you feeling?" I ask him looking at him concerned. I should make soup, or at least go to the store and buy some for him. I want to take care of him like he did when I was sick.

"Like crap," he says. "Everything hurts."

"Sorry, seems like you caught the flu I had," I tell him. I take a plate from the tray in his lap and start cutting up my food. For some reason, I'm starving. Christian drinks the tea I made slowly and with a face, that shows that he doesn't really like it and then proceeds to slowly eat the french toast I made. The way he closes his eyes tells me it hurts him to swallow.

"I like what you're wearing," he says.

"You should it's yours." I giggle at him. I hold the cup with both hands letting it warm my hands.

"I think I like it better on you than me," he says hoarsely. Then suddenly he smirks. "Of course I like it a lot more when you're naked. Are you sore?" he asks.

I flush, I think my face can be compared to a stop sign by now. I feel my teeth sink into my lip and I feel myself dampen at the memories from the night before. "A bit," I answer him.

"Stop biting your lip, it's very distracting. Especially when I know that you're naked underneath _my_ clothes. It's frustrating."

I swallow loudly. He is looking at me with a gaze that says 'I want you now' but he's sick and shouldn't exert himself right now. "Christian you need to rest," I tell him with a voice that's a bit too high, which has ruined completely my attempt to sound relaxed and natural. I feel my hormones rush through my body.

"I can rest when I'm dead. I want you, I just got you." I choke on my tea and start coughing hysterically. I look at him with an open mouth. I drink a few more sips of my tea. I have no idea what's his thinking. _Steele, you know that's a lie_ , my subconscious sneers. _You're thinking the same thing_. Be strong, Steele. I look down at my half-eaten plate, I'm not hungry anymore... _for that_. I stand up.

"Are you done eating?" I ask Christian as a distraction. I take the tray from his lap and put it on the dresser. I look at him again, he looks at me longingly almost like he is desperate. Although he is clearly sick he still looks beautiful. I try to compose myself and take a big breath.

"What did you think of last night?" Christian asks me with curiosity burning in his eyes. _He really wants to know._

 _"_ Good", I mumble.

"I also enjoyed it," he says with a shy smile. "I've never had vanilla sex before. It was really nice actually, but maybe it just had to do more with you than the actual sex."

 _What is vanilla sex?_ I look at him confused.

"Come here," he says and claps the free space in the bed beside him that has now somehow become my side of the bed.

When I sit down on the bed he reaches over with some difficulty and kisses me softly. My heart stops beating for a fleeting moment and I can feel the desire slowly but surely arise and take over my body.

"Christian, you're sick", I tell him when I manage to put some space between our lips. "You should be resting."

"I don't want to rest," he says and kisses me again. "I just want you." he continues pleadingly.

A shiver runs through my body. I feel his hands land on my breast and I gasp when he gently kneads my breast without pardon. My body reacts instinctively and I press my breast into the palm of his hand. It doesn't take him long before his hands wonder downward and caresses my stomach underneath my shirt. My own hands are in his hair. He takes one of my hands and puts it on his crotch. I feel him becoming bigger and bigger. _I had that inside of me yesterday,_ I think to myself. It almost seems impossible. He wants me to touch him...

I let my hands go into his pants and take hold of his manhood. He sucks in his breath and closes his eyes. Christian lowers his pants and then shows me how I should please him. It feels harder and smoother than expected. I watch Christians face while I please him and relish in the feeling of power I have. I'm the one giving him all the pleasure. He grasps for air and opens his eyes, there burning with passion.

"Just like that", he says. Christian lets go of my hand and let me do the rest of the work. He stretches his hips and follows my movements. He opens his mouth and breathes heavily. I'm feeling a bit adventurous and decide to take him in my mouth. I lean forward suck carefully while I let my tongue go over the head.

"Oh... Ana." He says when I suck harder. He tastes kind of salty.

I bow down and take him deeper than I did before. He moans again. I'm doing this right! I look up while I suck him and see that he's looking at me with fire in his eyes. I see his jaw tense up while he follows my movements attentively and deliberately. I take as deep as I can with my hands on his lap for support. His leg starts to jerk and he takes my hair and continues to waggle his hips.

"If you don't want me to come in your mouth then you need to stop right now," he says warningly. I can do this, I think to myself. And, surely after a few moments, he came in my mouth with a loud yelp.

I sit up and notice that he has completely knocked out of his senses and I feel very proud of my achievement. I look at him triumphantly, with the big smile that kind of makes my cheeks hurt. Who looks at me a tidbit worried.

"Have you done that before?" he asks suspiciously.

"No", I say proudly.

He smiles. "Miss. Steele, then you have a talent." Christian says relieved looking at me with wonder. I lick my lips. _I can't believe I just did that!_ Christian leans over and whispers. "I owe you an orgasm."

I feel my body squirm under the thought of an another orgasm. I pull away and shake my head. "You'll have to repay me later." I stand up, take the dishes and walk to the kitchen before he can convince me to stay. I put away all the dishes and walk towards the elevator to try to find the bag I brought with me. I would like to brush my teeth and take a shower. I find my bag by the chest of drawers that stands by the elevator. I quickly grab it and head towards the bedroom again. I take a few deep breaths before I walk in.

Christian is still laying in bed when I come back. He looks at me as I walk into the room again. He follows my movements attentively like he is expecting me to do something. I walk around the room and start picking up my clothes and start putting them away in my bag. I take out a clean shirt, my jeans, and underwear alongside my toothbrush. When I'm done changing I walk out to find a very unsatisfied Christian. His long eyelashes cast small shadows down his cheek. He also has a slight five o'clock shadow that I hadn't noticed before. He doesn't look like he is sweating anymore so I guess his fever has gone down a bit but he looks a bit grumpy.

"How are you feeling?" I ask him carefully.

"Better than before." Christian mutters. "I don't like that you just walked away from me."

"Christian, you need to rest. Put all your energy on getting better instead." I tell him.

"How do you now that it won't make me feel better? Your previous treatment did wonders to my well-being."

"Because I can see how tired you are. You barely have the energy to move. Please, Christian, just rest." I think of something. "The sooner you get better the sooner you'll get to repay my favor," I smirk at him.

He looks at me for a few moments and then he nods. "Come here then."

"No funny business," I tell him and sit down beside him. He puts his head on my lap and takes a few breaths. I run my fingers through his hair. Suddenly we hear voices in the corridor just outside the bedroom. It takes me a while to figure out what's going on.

 _"But if his not gotten up yet then he must be sick. He never sleeps in late. Christian is lively in the mornings."_

 _"Mrs. Grey, I beg you."_

 _"But, Taylor, you don't want to stand in the way between me and my son. Can you please tell me what's going on?"_

 _"Mrs. Grey, he is not in there alone."_

 _"What do you mean by that?"_

 _"Somebody else is in there with him."_

 _"Oh... You mean in that way."_ I can hear how skeptical she is. Christian jolts up and blinks a few times with a wild and amused look.

"Fuck! It's my mother."

I look at him with confusion and then when the realization hits me with pure dread. I was not prepared for this. I want her to have a good first impression of me, not this, panicked Anastasia. I say very stupid things when I'm nervous. What if she doesn't like me or thinks that I'm not good enough for her son? Christian smiles at my reaction. I run towards my bag trying to frantically find something. I just have no idea what I'm looking for. I look down at the floor and discover that our clothes were thrown all over the room. I start to take them but he tells me to leave them. I look at him confused.

"She will now either way." he says.

"But, it's embarrassing," I say and the bastard just shrugs with a smile.

I put my hair in a ponytail, hoping to contain my crazy hair. Christian's eyes sparkle with happiness, he really is enjoying seeing me panic and run around like a scared chicken.

"Another first," he says and I have no idea what he is talking about and at the moment I don't really care. What am I supposed to do?

"Maybe I should just hide in your closet or something," I tell him. That sounds like the best idea I have had all day.

"You will not do that," Christian says angrily. "We're together, I want to introduce you to my mother. I've already met your father." when he sees that I'm not completely convinced he continues with. "Anastasia, you would be beautiful even in a burlap sack. Don't worry. She will love you."

I nod. He should know his own mother and if he says that he wants to do this then and that everything will be alright, then I need to trust him.

"Mom, you can come in," Christian calls out to his mom. His voice breaks and he starts to cough.

"There you are, honey. Are you sick?" She looks friendly and concerned for her child. A woman with ash-blond hair and impeccably dressed in a camel brown knit dress and matching shoes walks into the room. She is elegant, beautiful and poised and inside I'm dying because I know that I'm not looking my best. She hurries to the bed and takes her sons temperature, she does not look pleased. I don't think she has noticed me yet.

"Mom, I'm fine. Anastasia is taking care of me," he says and with the mention of my name the woman looks up and meets my eyes. She looks at me with a bit of surprise and then I see her eyes move to the floor. I'm so embarrassed that I could die, my cheeks are very red. I offer my hand to her so that we can shake hands. "Mom, this is Anastasia Steele. Anastasia, this is my mom Grace Trevelyan-Grey.

"Nice to meet you, Mrs. Trevelyan-Grey", I tell her self-consciously. I give her a shy smile.

Mrs. Trevelyan-Grey looks at me with wonder and she seems almost relieved to see me. Her hazel eyes are warm and her voice soothing and calming. She gives me a bright smile that I reciprocate.

"Please, dear, call me Grace." she smiles. "Usually they call me Dr. Trevelyan and my mother in law Mrs. Grey." She blinks at me.

"Maybe we should continue this conversation in the living room with a cup of coffee," Christian says. He gets out of bed with some level of difficulty. Christian takes my hand as we walk towards the living room. He sits down on the sofa with a thump. His mom stayed behind in the kitchen to make some coffee. After giving Christian a chaste kiss on the cheek I hurry out to help Grace. I find her by the stove boiling some water.

"I know that Christian doesn't drink tea and that he probably doesn't have any tea here but he really shouldn't drink anything caffeinated right now." I nod and go towards the cabinet where the tea is. I give her the box, she looks at it surprised.

"I didn't know he started drinking tea", she mutters. "He says it's not strong enough for him." Grace says looks at the tiny box I gave her and then back at me.

"I'm not much of a coffee drinker," I tell her. She nods and gives me a smile.

I take some cups from the cabinet and put them on the counter. "You're a pediatrician right?"

"Yes, I am. The best job in the whole world. I love kids." she tells me. "My husband, on the other hand, will tell you that being a lawyer is the best job in the whole world." she smiles. "What do you do for a living?" she asks me while we walk back to the living room where Christian is.

"I'm currently unemployed. I just graduated college." I tell her hoping that she doesn't think that I'm a gold-digger. I can't really blame her I would've thought so if Christian was my son.

"I see. What did you major in?"

"I have a major in English literature and a minor in economy. I would like to work in publishing, as an editor."

"So, you like to read then," Grace says as we walk into the living room with the beverages.

"Ana is one of the smartest people I know," Christian says. "She graduated with a 4.0 GPA."

I look at Christian confused, I never told him that. In fact, I haven't told anyone that. How does he know?

"Your professors told me after they saw us together at your graduation," Christian tells me. "Professor Collins said that you are one the best students he has ever had."

"He is trying to kiss your ass, " I say to him without thinking. _Good job at embarrassing yourself, Steele._ Christian smiles at my statement and Grace laughs. I feel my body relax.

"I'm sure that's a lie, dear." Grace says with a sweet voice. She hands over a cup of tea to his son and then one to me. She is sitting across from us in a cream-colored chaise. "How did you two meet?" I look at Christian when he begins telling his mother the story of how we met.

"I bumped into her in a party that Elliot dragged me to four years ago. I accidentally broke her hand," he says simply.

Grace looks confused and a bit hurt at his son statement.

"What do you mean that you accidently broke her hand?" she asks horrified.

"She touched my chest, I wasn't prepared for it so I shoved her and she landed on her hand," Christian says looking ashamed.

"It's completely healed now, it was an accident," I say to Christians defense. "It wasn't his fault."

Grace nods and looks a bit hurt. "Christian, does this mean that you two have been together for four years?" she asks.

"No, we didn't talk after that. That night I drove Anastasia to the hospital and then left. I didn't see her again until recently. Anastasia interviewed me for an article for the Washington State University's student paper because I was supposed to and out diplomas to the students."

"Oh, I see," Grace says relieved. "So, how long have you been dating then?" she asks. "I was just here because Elliot called and said that you were here. I haven't talked to you in a while so I thought that I would take you out for lunch."

"About three weeks." Christian answers.

"I was just here because Elliot called and said that you were here. I haven't talked to you in a while so I thought that I would take you out for lunch."

"He did?" Christian says with an eyebrow raised.

"Yes, now I understand why he was so adamant," she mutters. "But, I'm glad he did." she smiles. "Well, I should get going. I see your well taken care of. Drink a lot of fluids, Christian and rest. No work and no other activities that require a lot of energy like sex." She says and emphasizing the last part with an arched brow. _Can I please just disappear?_ Christian looks as uncomfortable as I do.

"It was nice meeting you, dear. I hope that I'll see you again soon."

"Likewise, Grace," I say to her.

"I'll call you later, Christian." she says with a smile.

Taylor reappears out of nowhere. And hands her coat and bag.

"Mrs. Grey," he says.

"Thank you, Taylor," she says. Taylor follows Grace out of the room and out to the hall. Has Taylor been here all this time? Where has he been?

Christian smiles at me with a look that says 'I told you so'. I roll my eyes and look out of the window. There is a comfortable silence while we sit there enjoying each others company. Taylor reapers looking a bit worried.

"There's a problem, Mr. Grey, with the shipment to Darfur."

Christian nods and sighs to Taylor. Taylor nods to me acknowledging my presence. "Miss Steele."

"Hi, Taylor." I smile. Taylor turns around and walks away.

"Does he live here?" I ask Christian curiously.

"Yes." he stands up and returns shortly with his phone. He is calling someone.

"What's the problem, Ros?" he asks in a disagreeable tone. He listens intently while he looks at me. I can't decipher what he is thinking or feeling at the moment which makes me feel nervous and a bit out of place.

"I don't want to risk the garrison. No, you'll have to cancel it... We'll drop it from the air instead... Good."

He is quiet for a moment. "What do you mean with 'I sound like shit'?" he asks.

"Careful, don't forget that I'm still your boss, Ros," he says with a small grin and then hangs up. Christian coughs and looks beat when he sits down beside me again. There's a comfortable silence for a while until Christian starts speaking.

"My mom loved you," Christian says and gives me a beautiful smile.


	16. Chapter 16 - Opportunity

Greetings everyone,

I hope everyone has had a nice holiday (regardless if you celebrate Christmas or not). I'm so very sorry for taking my time with writing, I'm going to do my absolute best to write more next year and throughout the remaining holidays.

Thank you for taking the time to read my story. As always I hope you're having a nice day/night wherever in the world you are.

* * *

Christian is the most stubborn man there is on this planet. It has to be his way or no way at all. I made the cure for him but he refused to take it, he stuck by his statement that he rather be sick than take that "thing". So sick he was... For two whole weeks. It was like his body had decided to shut down and not reactivate for that amount of time. All he did is sleep, work and complain... About everything. What he complained about the most was about sex, or rather the lack of it. Ever since his mom came by and left those specific recommendations I've been very adamant about following them much to his dismay. I've never found him to be as someone that complains a lot, although I admit that I'm not the best person to ask because I haven't known him for that long, but his complaining is almost as bad as Kate's. Every nap was like a gift sent down from up above.

I've stayed here almost every night because of two main reasons. The first one, and the most important one, because he was sick and he needed someone to take care of him and the second is because the apartment that I'm currently sharing with Kate is now also empty. Kate is staying with Elliot because she doesn't want to be alone. She claims that she will return the second I do to the apartment, but I'm not so sure. Ever since they talked about their relationships and their feelings with one another they've been terribly cozy. They've become the kind of couple that makes you want to throw up because their being so cheesy. And I'm not to keen on having the apartment to myself either. I've become so used to having someone around all the time that the thought of being alone almost scares me. So, with other words, I'm dreading heading back home today.

No one has called with an job offer which makes me worried. I have bills to pay and no money to pay it with. I Or that would be a lie, there is one offer that has dropped in and it's from Christian's company. I'm sure he has talked to whomever is recruiting interns and told them to include me. When I applied for the internship I applied for the experience, the more job experience the better. I never thought in a million years that I would be dating the man who founded and owns the company. If I'm being completely honest I'm toying with the idea of excepting the offer. A position or internship in Grey Enterprises Holdings is a very prestigious opportunity and something that definitely gives a lot of merit in one's curriculum. The internship is also paid which would solved the bills problem. The only thing that is negative about this is the fact the Christian is my boyfriend.

Isn't there a conflict of interest? Would his reputation suffer if I would start in his company? _Steele, you would probably never even see him in the building. I doubt interns and big Kahunas of the company are hanging out,_ Kate told me when I called her asking for advice the other day. She ended our conversation with "g _o with your instincts_ ". The only thing is, I don't know what my instincts are telling me. That's why I'm currently staring at my phone screen at the e-mail I got.

* * *

From: Charlotte Alvarez GEH  
Subject: Internship  
Date: 24th of May 2016  
To: Anastasia Steele

Dear Miss Steele:

On behalf of Grey Enterprises Holdings, I am pleased to extend to you this offer of temporary employment as an intern, reporting to Charlotte Alvarez. If you accept this offer, you will begin your internship with the company on the 10th of July and will be expected to work 40 hours per week.

You will be paid per hour, less all applicable taxes and withholdings. As an intern, you will receive "temporary employment" status. As a temporary employee, you will not receive any of the employee benefits that regular company employees receive, including, but not limited to, health insurance, vacation or sick pay.

Your internship is expected to end on the 10th of August. However, your internship with Grey Enterprises Holdings is "at-will", which means that either you or the company may terminate your internship at any time, with or without cause and with or without notice.

During your employment, you may have access to trade secrets and confidential business information belonging to Grey Enterprises Holdings. By accepting this offer of employment, you acknowledge that you must keep all of this information strictly confidential, and refrain from using it for your own purposes or from disclosing it to anyone outside Grey Enterprises Holdings. In addition, you agree that upon conclusion of your employment you will immediately return to the company all of its property, equipment and documents, including electronically stored information.

You'll have until the 30th of this month to accept the offer.

Charlotte Alvarez  
Head of Human Relations  
Grey Enterprises Holdings Inc.

* * *

I still have six days left to decide. Maybe I should talk with Christian, after all, it's his company and ultimately his life. If he doesn't want me there then I won't accept the internship. But, the thought of that a publishing house might call and offer me a job is still in the back of my head. I have a tendency to overthink things and worry over things that I shouldn't be worried about. My dad has a saying to my tendency to overthink and that is "what if 'what if' didn't exist?". It's an abstract thing to say but I get what he means. It's a phrase he uses to remind me to be present and don't overthink. I sigh. _Just talk to him and see what he thinks,_ I urge myself. I walk towards Christian's office where he is currently working. The minute he felt a little bit better he completely ignored his mother's advice to not work. He needs to feel productive or he will go crazy, he says. Christian has also been cranky the past few days, he complains a lot about the fact that I'm not sleeping with him.

 _It's not that I don't want to_ , I think to myself as I walk towards his office. His only now starting to feel better. _Maybe I could get some before I leave the apartment_ , I wonder. I'm sure he would be more than willing. I smile at myself and unbutton two buttons so I reveal a bit more cleavage that I do normally. I have a flannel buttoned shirt on today with my favorite pair of blue jeans and black converse. This is my go to outfit, much to Kate's horror. I have to many flannel shirts for my own good and nothing that is work appropriate for an office. I have to check my bank account and buy a few work-appropriate shirts. Maybe I could borrow some of Kate's clothes until I receive my own paycheck. I sigh, I hate shopping.

Christian has his back turned towards me. Christian is overlooking the view he has over Seattle. His home office is somehow almost an exact replica of the one he has at work. The only real difference is the color palate. This one is more "relaxed" with more earth tones. It seems like he has been starring out the window for a while. Before I sent over my application to GEH I made my research. Of course I didn't think of looking up the CEO but I did do my research on the company itself. I remember that I read on their website that Grey Enterprises Holdings employs, in some capacity, 10 % of the Seattle's population which almost makes him like royalty. It's mind-blowing to think that one man can own so much power over a city. The company also donates a surmountable amount of it's earnings to charity - especially the ones that fight hunger in the third world. Grey Enterprises Holdings really is a company like no other.

"Are you looking for something specific?" I ask him with a light tone, leaning against the door frame. "Or maybe you're just staring at your own reflection?"

"Why would I like to sit and stare at myself?" He retorts. I can see from his reflection that he is giving me a small smile.

"I don't know, it's something I'd gladly do all day." I give a soft smile. "I need your honest opinion on something."

"All my opinions are honest," he says becoming more serious in an instant, this is how I imagine him as a CEO, serious and no bull-shit. "What about?" Christian turns around and squints slightly at me. Letting me now that I have his full attention. He motions for me to take a seat in one of the chairs next to his desk.

I walk towards one them and sit on it. It still feels new, like not many people have sat on it before. That's not that surprising I can't really see him entertaining guests here... Unless it was to meet his submissives. I wonder if they have sat here, just like I am right now, at this chair and discussed at length their contract, hard and soft limits. I try to block the mental image that pops out of my head. Think of something else!

"I received an e-mail of acceptance for an internship. I'm just wondering if I should take it or wait for another job offer. " I ask him. I try to watch him carefully as I tell him this.

"Which company?" he asks with some urgency in his voice.

I swallow the excessive saliva in my mouth and take a big gulp of air. "Yours," I answer him.

He smiles broadly, like a wolf. "So, you are considering the offer."

"I am. So, you were involved in the decision of my internship?"

"No, I wasn't. I don't have the time to weave through all the applications, that's why I hire people to do it for me. I only employ the best, and you Miss. Steele, are one of the best."

I nod, almost believing his answer. "Mr Grey you still haven't answered my original question." I remind him.

"I think that it's an excellent internship program and that you should take it."

"Really?" I ask him surprised, I was expecting a different answer. "But, what would it mean for us?"

"What do you mean?'"

"I mean is there a lot of contact between interns and the CEO? Is there a no fraternising rule in your company? Would you treat me like anyone else?"

"No, regularly there is not a lot of contact between interns and the CEO. There is no rule that says that you can't be involved with your colleagues because I don't give a fuck, as long everyone is doing their work. You're my girlfriend but you won't get any extra privileges except having sex with me all the time." he coughs. "So, yes I would treat you differently in the sense that I don't usually fuck my employees."

"Christian, if I were to take internship I would like to ask for as little contact as possible during work hours," I say to him.

"Why, are you ashamed of me?" he asks with a poker face but you can detect the hurt in his voice.

"NO!" I say firmly. "But, you need to treat me like every other intern, IF I would accept the offer."

"So, if you take the internship our relationship will have to be kept a secret?"

"No, not a secret as that we deny that we are together. I'm just asking that we don't flaunt our relationship to everyone. If someone asks if we are together then we answer them honestly but we don't say anything unless someone specifically asks about our respective partners."

"Ana, I don't give a fuck who knows about us."

"I know, but I want to be known for my accomplishments not because I'm fucking the boss."

"You're not currently fucking the boss." He looks at me dreamingly and with a sly smile. He is turned on right now.

"Because you've been sick. I've been following doctors orders." I say.

"Well, I'm not sick anymore." he states.

"No, you're not." I agree.

He nods and looks at me with hungry eyes. He coughs a few times and then he stands up and walks slowly towards me.

"I would like to fuck you now," he says slowly. "On top my desk."

* * *

As much as it pains me to admit the new car that Christian gave me is a dream to drive. I don't even need to park in this thing, it does it automatically. Which is perfect because I suck at parking, I almost didn't pass the drivers test because of the parking. Christian wasn't happy when I left him in the apartment shortly after our... Nooky. As I drive back to the apartment I think of phrases or words that I can use to describe sex. If there's something that I don't like talking about is sex. Jose and Kate think that Gavin and I are prudes because of it. Those to know no boundaries when they describe an event in their lives, especially sex. Everything has to be told with accuracy and with as many details as possible. I guess that's why they both are so good at their jobs - they always tell the truth, in one way or another.

The apartment feels empty as expected and it has a slight stale smell. I open a window and let the apartment air out for a while. Torn by Natalie Imbruglia comes up when I hit shuffle on the music playlist. I unpack my things and wash everything that's dirty. I decide to take a shower. I smell like sex and a bit of Christian. After a warm shower I decide to go to a restaurant nearby and order food since we don't have any at home. I send a quick text to Kate telling her that I'm home and walk out the door in the lookout for a restaurant. There is a Chinese restaurant that I decide to try out. The food is so cheap that I stop for a minute and wonder if the food is really disgusting or if I'm going to get food poisoning because it almost feels to good to be true. The restaurant is packed with people though and they all look fine. I order the cheapest thing on the menu, some kind of noodle dish, when I hear some sort of commotion in the back. There are two women obviously arguing with each other.

Out of pure curiosity I look back and see them. Their both gorgeous and obviously come from money. One of them is strawberry blond and tiny compared to the woman standing in front of her. She has short, raven hair that flows down to her shoulders. She is tall and curvaceous, in a good way. She is the kind of girl that has all the curves in all the right places. Her friend is good looking but has nothing compared to the brown haired beauty that is screaming at her.

"Do you honestly think I'm so stupid Lily?" she fumes. "I saw you. I came home early to surprise him and I saw you fucking Sean. You were supposed to be my friend. How could you?" she says with a voice the shows the hurt she is feeling.

Lily looks around the restaurant at all the people that are curiously looking at them. She lowers her voice and starts denying the accusations. "Lily, stop. I know what I saw, I have a fucking key to his apartment. You were riding him in his bed yesterday and Sean already confessed. I knew you liked men who were already taken but I never thought you would go after Sean."

"Is that what he said?" she asks. "He wasn't seduced Mia, he wanted it."

"I know. I hope you're happy together because you certainly deserve each other." Mia tells Lily and then sits down again. Lily looks at Mia and then takes her things and walks away. Mia just stares at her plate.

"Excuse me, Miss, your food is ready." I hear the server say. I look at him confused for a few seconds.

"Thank you," I tell him and leave a tip in the tip jar. I look around again and see that the girl has started crying. Should I say something to her? What is the right etiquette when a stranger is crying? Should you just ignore it or try to console the person who is obviously sad. I decide to talk to her. I grab my food and walk towards her cautiously.

"Hi, excuse me, I accidentally overheard your conversation and just wanted to say that you deserve better," I tell her, the girl just stares at me. "Sorry, that I disturbed you. I will go now." I say awkwardly when I don't get any response. Now I know, just ignore the sad person.

"No, please stay," she says. "God, knows I need the company." she sniffs. I reach into my bag and give her a tissue. Thank God, that I always carry those around. She thanks me for the tissue. I sit down beside her.

"My name is Mia, by the way." she says.

"Ana," I tell her. We shake hands. "Do you want to talk about it? It can be nice to talk to a stranger sometimes." I ask her. A waiter comes around with a glass of water. I give him a nod.

"I went away to study abroad and just came back after graduating. I was scheduled to come here tomorrow but decided to catch an earlier flight to surprise him. But the joke was on me because it was me who got the surprise of a lifetime. He cheated on me with someone I thought was my friend." she sniffs again.

I put my bag and my phone on the table. I put my hand over hers. "No one deserves that." Mia shakes her head, we become silent.

"What did you graduate in?" I ask her, trying to distract her.

"Culinary school. I'm officially a chef," she says proudly.

"I love cooking," I tell her. "Maybe you could share some tips."

"It's all about the preparation. If you prepare you'll remove all the stress," she says with a small smile.

"That seems like a great tip for life," I say. Mia laughs a bit.

"I never thought of it that way but I guess so." She says.

We sit there for a long while just talking. She tells me that she is adopted and has to siblings. That she is currently unemployed and that her dream is to open her own restaurant. I tell her that I have no siblings, that I also just graduated and that I'm also currently unemployed.

"So, Ana. Do you have any problems that you can dump on me? I want to focus on your problems instead of mine for a while." she smiles.

"Well, I've been accepted into a paid internship but I'm not really sure if I should take it," I tell her. I see her raise her eyebrows.

"What's the problem?"

"My boyfriend works there. He would be my boss."

"Oo, I see. You don't want people to think you're screwing your way up to the top." I flinch at her words and nod.

"Do you want my advice?" Mia asks and I nod. "Take it. Screw what everyone thinks. Let them think what they want, the most important thing is that you know and the people you care about know why you are doing the things you do. Other than that, just don't give a fuck."

I let what she says sink in and realise that she is right. I shouldn't care what other people think of me because it doesn't matter. Christian has been right all along. I should just accept the internship. I hear my phone start to ring.

"Why is my brother calling you?" Mia asks suspiciously. I look down at my phone and see that it's Christian. I look up at her.

"Brother?" I ask Mia confused. Could she really be his sister, what are the odds of that? Maybe it's just someone that has the same name. I'm so stupid why didn't I notice this before. She told that she was adopted and she recently came back! Mrs Grey said was coming back tomorrow. I close my eyes, this can't be happening.

"Christian Grey is my brother," she says. Showing the photo she has a background on her phone. I picture of her, Elliot and Christian. I feel my cheeks redden.

"He is my boyfriend," I tell her sounding unsure. Stand your ground Steele, you've done nothing ground. I try to surmount courage but I find her anger very disarming.

She looks at me angrily. "My brother does not have a girlfriend, I would know if he had one. Who are you?"

" I don't know what to do, so I just answer the phone. She glares at me. If looks could kill I'd be seven feet under.

"Ana, where are you? I'm at your place but you aren't here."

"I'm at a Chinese restaurant across the street..." I tell him.

"Are you okay? You don't sound okay? I'm coming over." Christian asks me concerned.

"Give me the phone." Mia demands.

"Eh, Christian your sister wants to talk to you," I say.

"My sister?" I hear him say confused as I give Mia the phone.

"Christian?!" she asks.

"Mia?!" I hear him ask

It's just me that can make this happen. Is this bad luck or just poor timing? I look at her closely. So, this is Christian's sister. She is obviously very protective of her brother, when she spoke about her family her whole face looked brighter. It's obvious that she loves them very much. Have I fallen into her bad graces now. Why would you? My subconscious sneers. You haven't done anything wrong. I repeat this again, again in my head.

"Why didn't you tell me you had a girlfriend?" she asks the phone. "I just made a fool of myself." She looks me over and gives me an apologetic smile. "I don't think that I scared her away. She's very nice by the way." She looks towards the window. Christian is probably coming here. "Long story." she nods and makes a confirming sound. "See you soon then."

"I'm so sorry for before," she says honestly. "You have to understand. He's never had a girlfriend before and if being honest, I didn't think that the day would come. I have to look out for him, he's my brother."

"I understand," I smile. And I do understand her reaction but it doesn't mean that it didn't hurt that she so quickly jumped to the conclusion that I was lying. I really must've been underwhelming, not good enough for her brother. I guess I'll have to prove everyone wrong and it doesn't really matter, Christian chose to make me his girlfriend. He wants to be with me for a reason. It's time for me to follow the advice Mia just gave, don't care about what other people think.

"Look, I know that I don't have a right to ask anything of you after the stunt I just pulled but could you please keep the Sean thing between us for now? Christian and Elliot would murder Sean if they knew and right now I don't have the willpower to stop them."

I nod. "Thank you." She says.

I feel his presence before I can see him. I know Christian is in the room. I feel my body relax, at least now we have a buffer if anything becomes awkward again. I'm so out of my depth here, I really don't know how to handle the situation. I look at Mia as she is completely unaware that her brother just walked into the restaurant. She looks pensive and kind of sad. Seeing her upset makes my heart ache.

"Ladies." I hear him say behind us. I feel his hand on my shoulder, I put my hand over his and give him a small smile. Mia stands up and hugs him. I see Christian tense up immediately at the contact. Either Mia isn't aware of the fact or maybe she's just ignoring it.

"Brother, I'm so happy to see you." she smiles. Her smile seems honest and excited, as she said the words a squeal came out.

"Mia," Christian says. "What are you doing here?"

"I came home early," she says and kisses his cheek. Even though she technically answered Christian's question I know that that wasn't the answer Christian was looking for. He notices the avoidance and rephrases his question.

"How did you and Ana meet?" Christian asks again.

"I was going to order food and saw that she was sitting alone so I asked if I could join her," I tell him. Christian gives me a suspicious look. I give him a smile and a look that says I'll tell you later even though I don't plan on doing so. I feel guilty for lying but it isn't my secret to tell, he of all people should understand that.

"But you haven't eaten yet, your food is still on the table." he remarks.

"We got wrapped up in conversation," Mia says quickly. She smiles at me. "Well, I should get going. Mum and Dad still don't know I'm home." She stands up, gets her bag. I stand up to for some reason I don't understand and receive a bone crushing hug.

"Thanks, I owe you one," Mia whispers in my ear. I just smile at her. This afternoon has given me a headache. I don't even now what's going on anymore. I look at Christian and give him a kiss. I don't even know what for, but I just lean in and give him a kiss with all the feelings that I have inside. He kisses me back and then breaks apart after a few moments.

"If you keep doing that then will give everyone here a show," Christian says against my lips. I blush because I had forgotten about the restaurant and the people in it. I look around and notice a few people giving us a few glances.

"Maybe we should go," I say to him. I take his hand.

"Miss. Steele, show the way."


	17. Chapter 17 - The Talk

Christian ended up spending the night at my apartment. The apartment still needs a few finishing touches before it's completely finished but soon enough it will be done. I've never been more thankful for a small bed as I am now because it means that Christian and I need to be closely intertwined in order to fit in it. He smells like sex and Christian. I smile when I remember the night before. He tried to get me to speak about Mia. He knows something wasn't right from the minute he walked into the restaurant. So... I distracted him with the only thing that can distract Christian Grey - sex. I get hot just thinking about the night before.

I woke up with my face against his chest. With a jolt, I backed away from his chest with a sense of panic but after noticing that Christian was still deep in sleep the panic subsided. Therefore, I decided to explore his chest with my eyes. He has small circular scars all over his chest, maybe it's smallpox scars, and don't think more of it. He has a light sprinkle of hair on his muscular chest. My fingers long to run my fingers through his chest. I lie down against his chest again and decide to kiss his chest.

"Ana?" I hear Christian ask sounding very insecure. I freeze. I feel like a child who has been caught with his hand in the cookie jar even though his parents specifically said 'no cookies before dinner'. I look at him afraid that he'll be mad at me. "Good morning," he says.

"Good morning," I smile. He doesn't seem mad...

"Why do you look so guilty?" Christian asks me.

"No reason," I say. Why am I so bad at lying?

"So, many secrets, Miss Steele. I don't know how to feel about this." He says grumpily.

"It isn't my secret to tell, Christian. Mia wants to tell you yourself."

"How come that you just met her and already have secrets that I'm not allowed to know?"

"I don't know."

There is a comfortable silence. "Maybe I'll just have to torture you," he says looking very satisfied with himself.

"What do you mean?" I ask him worried.

"You will see, Miss Steele."

Christian rolls us around so that he is now on top of me. He kisses me hungrily, demanding control and total submission. I kiss him back as good as I can. He looks me in the eyes. "Why, do you keep secrets for me?" His fingers go towards my ear where he starts playing with my earlobe. This is so exciting. I close my eyes and try to gather my thoughts.

"What are you thinking about?" I hear Christian ask again.

"You," I answer him breathlessly.

I open my eyes again and find him smiling. My eyes are drawn to his mouth. He moves his hand from my ear to my chin where he gently caresses it. "When I'm done with you all your secrets will be out in the open." he threatens.

He looks at me with fire in his eyes and clearly enjoying the challenge. He parts his lips a little - he waits, prepared to attack. The desire bursts out in my stomach. I reach out to kiss him but he holds my face in a way that makes it impossible for me to move it. He leans down and kisses me. He wants to control every aspect of this. Okay, game on, I think to myself as my competitiveness awakens. He presses his body against mine. He wants me. Something inside me comes alive and makes me feel very confident. Like I'm Aphrodite or some other kind of beautiful goddess. Christian stops kissing me and look at me intently looking for something.

"Do you trust me?" he whispers.

I nod, wide-eyed, and with my heart beating loudly in my ears. He stands up and walks towards my bathroom while I lie looking at him confused. He returns holding the waistband of my bathrobe.

"I'm going to tie your hands," he says slowly and looking me in the eyes. I swallow hard and nod. I guess I'm meeting Christian the dominant. "Don't say a word or you'll be punished." he continues. Punished?! What does he mean by that?

He ties my hands together and the proceeds to tie them to my white headboard. He makes sure that I can't get out of the not he has tied. I'm trapped and I've never been more excited. He glides of me and stands by my bed looking at me hungrily. I'm only wearing his shirt and I'm completely naked underneath while he is only wearing a pair of boxers that look way too small right now. He bends down to his jeans takes out a foil packet. He puts it on my bedside table. His eyes show a combination of triumph and excitement.

"You're biting your lip. You know how that affects me, Anastasia," he says. "I think you've seen too much," he says laughing. He straddles me and then lifts up my shirt, making sure that my mouth and nose are not blocked and uses it as a makeshift blindfold.

He kisses me deeply. I'm pretty sure we're both naked at this point. He moves a little and I feel his member against my hip. I want him now but I don't dare say anything. Slowly and meticulously he kisses the center of my body. From my throat, down between my breasts, my stomach all the way down to my waist. He kisses my breasts and I feel so frustrated I just want to come. Is that too much to ask?!

"Christian, please!" I plead.

"Tell me what I want to hear and I'll make you come," he says.

That bastard. I fight against my restraints when he continues with the torture. "Christian, that's not fair," I say weakly.

"Life is not fair."

"Come on," I complain.

"Tell me." Christian insists.

I bite my lip. I'm so tempted to just tell him but I have to stay strong. He is making me crazy.

"Don't bite your lip," he growls and kisses me. It seems like I've found his weakness.

My skin is now super sensitive and every touch is intensified. I feel his fingers wander down my stomach. My hips automatically rise leading him to my center.

"Oh, baby," he says as he pushes to fingers inside of me. I gasp for air.

"Ana, this could be over if you just tell me."

"No."

He starts pulling his fingers in and out of my body. He runs his thumb over my clitoris. I moan loudly and I feel my body rise. He removes his shirt so that now I can see him.

"I want to touch you," I tell him.

"I know," he mumbles. He kisses me while he positions himself in place and then thrusts inside me. Our bodies start dancing together. Both highly aware of what the other is doing. It feels as if my body was on fire. This feels so good and so right. I throw my head back in ecstasy.

But, suddenly something changes in Christian and he pulls out. He takes me and turns me over so that I'm now laying on my stomach. He spanks me hard before thrusting inside of me again. I'm overwhelmed by the sudden attack on my ass but I have to admit that I liked it... A lot. He doesn't stop and somehow he seems to go deeper and deeper for each thrust. I'm done... I can't take this anymore, but he keeps going. And I feel every muscle inside of me tighten until I come. I yell out his name. This was very intense, to say the least. Finally, Christian slows down and comes inside me quietly. He pulls out and rolls over. He unties my restraints.

I lay there in bed, breathing deeply and thinking about what just happened. Christian rubs my wrists carefully. I take the sheet and put over our naked bodies.

"What was that?" I ask him carefully. "Don't get me wrong I liked it but it was a lot rougher than usual."

Christian keeps rubbing my wrists silently. He has his gaze focused on my hands. I'm lying beside him waiting expectantly for his answer. He is making me nervous with his silence. I look at him carefully and notice that his scar under his left eyebrow is a bit more noticeable today. It is probably an old scar judging by how faded it is. It is barely noticeable which leads me to believe the wound was probably sewn shut by some fancy plastic surgeon. I try to imagine young Christian... Christian in high school, I would've definitely had a huge crush on him. Mysterious and gorgeous every teenage girl's wet dream.

"Are you going to answer me?" I ask him again. I notice that my voice sounds a lot more confident than I actually feel.

"I'm trying, Ana, I really am. I've never been in a relationship without rules, a contract and BDSM before. But, I have needs... I miss the lifestyle. I need more." he says slowly.

I feel my heart break into two. I knew this was too good to be true, I'm not enough for him. I try to think about a solution that will mean that he can stay. I want to prove to him that I can be enough. Why does the thought of not being with him hurt this much? I've been with him for three weeks. GET A GRIP, STEELE, my subconscious screams at me, you will not change who you are for no one. My brain is working overdrive to try and find some kind of compromise.

"What about the lifestyle are you missing? Because if it's something along the lines of what we did before, I'm all for it." I say to him honestly. I' praying to whoever is up there I don't start giggling like a schoolgirl when we talk about sex. Now it's not the time to be a prude. "But, Christian, I don't think that I could be a submissive, even if I tried, outside of sex. I like when you take control but the thought of you punishing me for some obscure rule scares me. Along with the whole whip and cane thing. But, however, if it's the submissive part you're missing then you'll have to look elsewhere because I can't be that for you."

Christian looks at me hurt, but he quickly puts on an unreadable poker face. He wasn't expecting that answer. Are we breaking up? Is this is it? It feels like our relationship was a rock crashing into earth. Burning bright until it hits the earth's atmosphere and breaks into a thousand, if not a million different pieces. I fight the tears are on the brink of falling in my eyes. I stand up and quickly get dressed. This is not a conversation I want to have naked.

"Why are you so opposed being a submissive?" Christian asks me. "Maybe you can try it and see if you like it. I'll be good to you I promise."

"Christian, that's not the problem. I'm sure you're a great dominant but I'm not a submissive. I doubt I would be a very good one and then we would have this same conversation again but in the future. And if a submissive is what you really want then we have to stop now before this gets any more complicated and you break my heart."

"What did you think about what we did before?" he asks seriously.

"I've already told you. I liked it a lot. It was nice."

"That word doesn't describe what I'm feeling right now at all," Christian says irritated.

"Why don't you like people touching you?" I ask becoming more annoyed with him as well. In all honesty, he has hurt my pride and my feelings. His confession only confirms what I already suspected I'm not enough for this nearly perfect specimen of a man.

"Long story," he says simply. He looks sad.

"It always is," I mutter becoming more irritated at the fact he never shares anything. I'm always kept in the dark. "Do you want breakfast?" I ask him trying to defuse the situation. I hate fighting with people and somehow fighting with Christian seems like it would be on a whole other level. I stand up and walk out to the kitchen, giving him privacy to get dressed. While in the kitchen, I notice that we don't have any food. Now, that I come to think about it I don't think that I have any food here. We'll have to go out and eat. I gather my stuff, like phone, wallet, and keys and put it in a small purse.

"We have to go out and eat. Kate and I don't have any food here." I tell Christian when he walks out to the living room/kitchen.

"Fine," he says irritated. I ignore his tone. "Why won't you tell me what Mia said to you?"

"It isn't my secret to tell Christian," I tell him seriously.

I open the front door and motion for him to walk out of it. I have no idea where we should eat, I know that there are a Starbucks two blocks from here but it's always full of people, and a small crowded area doesn't seem like something Christian would like very much. While he waits for the elevator I decide to google for a café's in the area. I decide that we should go to the one that's closest to my apartment.

There are some people sitting in the café but not at all crowded. This café reminds me of the one back in Portland. There is an overwhelming smell of pastries that overpower my senses. I walk to the counter and look at everything they have to offer and settled on a big slice of blueberry pie and a cup of tea. Christian does the wise thing and doesn't comment on my chosen breakfast. He orders a sandwich and a cup of joe.

"Have you thought about using some kind of contraceptive?" he asks as we sit down on the table nearest the window. I look at him like he is an alien that asked me out on a date. I was not expecting that question... At all. And not here.

"What do you mean?" I ask him tentatively. "I thought we were using condoms. Isn't that enough with the contraceptives?"

"We are but I hate them," Christian says sounding like small child stating that he does not like broccoli. "I thought that maybe you could go on the pill or take the shot. I've already called doctor Greene."

"Who's doctor Greene?" I ask getting more and more irritated with him. Who does he think he is making this kind of decisions for me?

"Seattle's best gynecologist, she's coming over to my place this afternoon," he states simply.

"Christian, what gives you the authority to make those decisions without me?! It's my body!" I say to him with a strict tone.

"It's mine too," he says with so much honesty that it catches me off guard. I don't know what to reply to that. I just stare at him until I decide to start eating my pie, but I'm still kind of angry that he would decide for me and not for me. And why doesn't he give me an answer on the submissive thing? Christian clears his throat making me look back at him again. He looks like he just remembered something unpleasant.

"My mom, wants you to come and eat dinner with us tonight. I think Elliot has asked Kate as well. I don't know how you feel about it. It will feel strange to introduce you to my family."

Why will it be strange? I've basically met his whole family by now. But, the real question is if it would be wise when Christian doesn't know what he wants out of this relationship.

"Are you sure? You don't seem so sure about our relationship and introducing me to your family formally is a big step." I nearly manage to say. The reminder that this... Whatever we have, can soon be over feels like a punch in my stomach.

"Of course not," he says and rolls his eyes.

"Then why will it be weird?" I ask him.

"Because I've never done it before, introduced someone to my family." I roll my eyes at his answer.

"I've already met almost everyone by now, Christian."

"Don't roll your eyes. It's not polite." I roll my eyes again, just for the heck of it.

"Why are you allowed to roll your eyes but not me?"

He looks at me like a big question mark. "I did?"

"Yes, just now. You hypocrite." I smile at him. He really is adorable when he is dumbfounded. I turn my gaze again to my gorgeous pie and eat it eagerly.

* * *

Taylor walks into the living room where Christian and I am sitting. I'm reading, or better said rereading The Merchant of Venice while Christian is sitting beside writing e-mails. In the background, classical music is playing that I don't recognize. I've realized that these past two weeks that this apartment is starting to feel a lot more like home. Almost more than my own apartment. The thought scares me, especially now. Fortunately, Taylor appears out of nowhere distracting me from my thoughts.

"Dr. Greene is here, Sir."

"Show her to my room." Taylor looks confused for a split second and then proceeds to disappear again. Christian stands up.

"Are you ready for contraceptives?" Isn't it a bit late for that question?, I think to myself.

"You aren't coming with me are you?" I say to him looking mortified.

He laughs wholeheartedly. "Believe me when I say that I would pay to see that but I don't think that the doctor would like it."

I take his hand and he pulls me off the sofa and then he kisses me softly. The kiss takes me by surprise and instinctively I put my hands on his arms. He puts his hand on my neck making it very hard for me to move my head. Then he puts his forehead against mine.

"I'm so glad you're here," he says. "I can't wait until I see you naked again."

I laugh and walk away towards the corridor that leads to Christians room. I knock on the door before I walk into Christian's room. I don't even know why it's just instinct. Dr. Greene is tall, blonde and impeccably dressed in a dark blue pantsuit. She reminds me of one of the girls that work for Christian at GEH, one more gorgeous blonde. Her make-up and hair complement each other perfectly. She is probably around forty. We shake hands.

"Good day, Miss Steele," she says. Her voice is very authoritative but non-threatening at the same time. Her handshake feels firm and instantly I know that she is a woman that doesn't tolerate any bullshit, like Kate. I like her instantly.

"Good day, Dr. Greene."

"So, Miss Steele. Mr. Grey has paid me a small fortune to be here today, so what can I help you with?"

I nod not really knowing what to answer to that. "I want to get on some kind contraceptive."

"Have you done any research in which kind of contraceptive you would like to try?" she asks looking me straight in the eye. I blush feeling a bit stupid.

"No, I haven't," I tell her

"No, problem. I'll just talk you through your alternatives."

After a close inspection and a long conversation with the doctor, we both come to the conclusion that I should start going on the pill. She prescribes me the pills and encourages me to go get them tomorrow. I really like how she gets straight to the point with everything she spoke about. She did remind me, repeatedly, of the importance of taking the pills at the same time every day. But, I notice that even she, the no-bullshit doctor, is very curious about my relationship with Christian. I don't give her any details. We walk out to living room area that looks more like an art gallery.

I see that Christian is reading something on the couch. He almost looks serenely as he reads. He looks up and smiles warmly at me.

"Are you finished?" he asks sounding genuinely interested. He points a remote control at a small speaker set and the volume is lowered but still playing in the background. He walks towards us.

"Yes, Mr. Grey. Take care of her she is an intelligent and remarkable young woman."

Christian looks at her confused and so do I. Isn't that a bit inappropriate for a doctor to say to a patient? Maybe it's some kind of badly formulated threat to Christian. Christian composes himself quickly.

"I'll do that," he mumbles.

"I'll send you the bill," she says and shakes his hand.

"Goodbye and good luck, Ana." she smiles genuinely. Taylor appears and shows her out.

"Thank you. You too."

"What was that?" Christian asks me.

"I don't know," I answer him. "When are we supposed to be at your parent's house?"

"Six, so we have time for some fun." Christian smiles.

In that moment I decide that I want to go back to my own apartment and get ready with my own clothes. Somehow this enormous loft is feeling very small and almost claustrophobic.

"I would love too, but I really should get going to my own place," I tell him.

"What do you mean? You just got here." Christian says.

"I need my own clothes and own things. I think it's better if I went back."

"Nonsense, I could buy you anything you need."

"But, I don't want you too. I have everything I need back at the apartment. Will you come and pick me up later?"

"Of course. We'll be outside 17.30." Christian relents. "Taylor." Christian shouts. "take Miss. Steele home."

"Yes, sir," Taylor says and leads me out of the apartment.

* * *

There is a lump in my stomach ever since this morning. I can't help but feel like this relationship is about to end and it's all because I'm not enough for him. "Don't break my brother's heart. I don't know how much he has told you about himself but he has had a rough past and he deserves to have someone that cares. He really likes you, I can tell, and that you like him too. So, please, be patient with him and don't break his heart." Elliot's words reappear in my head. Be patient, he begged me. I'm trying I really am. Should I try to change myself for him... Just try to be a submissive like he suggested? I cringe the thought of him hitting me doesn't feel right. I don't know what to do, I think to myself. I feel the tears start to fall down my cheeks. Just then my phone starts to ring. It's my mom.

"Hey, honey. How are you? How was your graduation?" she asks enthusiastically on the phone. Even though I'm not that close to my mom her voice feels very soothing.

"Sorry."

"But, Ana. What happened?" she asks me seriously.

"Nothing really. I don't even know why I'm crying."

She doesn't say anything for a few moments.

"Ana, what is it? You can tell me. I know I haven't really been there for you before but I'm here now," Her voice is soothing and calming and I know that she cares. I feel my tears becoming heavier and rolling down faster. "Please, Ana." She pleads.

"Mum, it's a guy."

"What has he done? I'm starting to become really worried." Her worry is very evident in her voice.

"It's not like that," I tell her and take a deep breath. "I really like him, but we want different things out of our relationship. And I just don't know what to do."

"Honey, I wish I was there for you. I'm so sorry that I missed your graduation and now you're in love as well, finally. I've missed so much."

"Mum, I'm not in love. I just like him... Very much."

"Ana doesn't matter what you call it the feeling is the same. And from what I'm hearing you're in love. And it sucks - trust me I know because your heart doesn't always make the right decisions. Men are so complicated, they're like a whole other species. How long have you known him?"

Christian is definitely from another species... From a whole different planet actually.

"Give or take... Three weeks."

"But, Ana, honey, that's no time at all. You can't possibly know him. Just put some distance between you two until you decide what you want out of your relationship with the boy." she says confidently.

"Mum, I already know what I want. It's him that doesn't know what he wants."

"Then my advice still stands. Give him some space until he knows what he wants out of the relationship." I hear her sigh. "You sound so sad, Ana. Come here and visit for a few days. I miss you, I haven't seen you in so long. Bob, would love it if you came. I think it would be good for you to get away for a while and gain some perspective. You need a break, I know how hard you've been working this past few year." That actually sounds really tempting. To get away for a while.

The door opens and Kate walks into the apartment with a big smile on her lips. She looks confused when she sees that I've been crying.

"I have to go, mum. But, I'll consider your offer."

"Do it, hun. Love you."

"Speak to you later." I hung up the phone.

Kate looks at me angrily. "What has he done?"

"Nothing, Kate."

She nods. "You'll tell me later. Because now we have to get ready for dinner."


	18. Chapter 18 - The Dinner

Hey, everyone, it's been a while!

I'm so sorry for my sporadic uploading. I've had a lot to do lately both at school and at work so this story has kind of taken the back seat... As I've said before I'll try to upload more often but I can't make any promises, I hope you understand.

I want to say a special thanks to GatePark for editing this story.

* * *

 **Chapter 18 – The Dinner**

"Ana, are you sure you don't want to talk about it?" Kate asks me for the twentieth time. She's really worried since she came home and found me crying on our living room floor. She's been asking me time and time again to tell her what is wrong. But, I really don't feel like talking about it right now. Besides, she would just be angry with me the whole evening for not telling her the whole story. Technically, I'm legally bound not to discuss anything concerning Christian but I wonder if it still stands? Do I have to keep my mouth shut now even though I'm his "girlfriend"? I don't want to spoil her evening, so, therefore my decision of not talking still stands.

"Can't you just give me a hint of what happened?" Kate asks as she rummages through my wardrobe. I doubt she will find anything worthy of this special occasion and will just end up lending me something, "that I just have to wear".

"You'll just get angry when I don't tell you the whole story," I tell her knowingly with a small smile, after all, she is my best friend and I know her. Kate turns around and looks me in the eyes.

"You're probably right but at least let me know that you're okay," she begs. "Please promise me that moneybags hasn't hurt you in any way. Because then I'll have to show him the consequences!" Kate says seriously. _Wow, she is not kidding... I wonder how she would react to the whole BDSM thing..._

"He hasn't done anything, Kate." _Yet_ , I think to myself and I tense up. I smile and walk towards her in an attempt to distract her. "What should I wear?" I ask her.

Kate watches me closely. She knows me too well; she's not going to let this go. "Ana, just talk to me. I can see that something's up."

"Maybe we should Skype with Gavin and Jose," I go to get my computer on my desk. I'm praying that they answer fast and rescue me from the inquisition that Kate is currently planning in her head. She is watching me closely. No wonder she studied to become a journalist. She is like a shark when she senses the faintest smell of blood she becomes consumed by the hunt.

"Hey, Ana," I hear Gavin say through the screen. I've never been happier to see his face. "Oh, hi, Kate. What's up?"

"We're going to meet Elliot and Christian's parents in about an hour," I say quickly and smile towards Gavin. "Where's Jose?"

"Out taking photos. Apparently, it's the golden hour right now. But, wow! You two already meeting the parents, isn't that a big step?"

"I don't know," I say honestly. "All I know is that I am very nervous. Although, I've already met everyone, well, except their dad..."

"Me too," Kate says. "Wait, what? What do you mean that you've already met everyone already?"

I smile, happy that my distraction worked. "Dr. Trevelyan-Grey came over to Christian's to take him to a surprise lunch but she was the one to get a surprise, I think," I laugh nervously.

"Did she walk in on you?" Gavin asked shocked. He looks at me with a mixture of happiness, pride, and astonishment. I practically see the mental picture he is forming in his mind right now. Kate and Gavin don't now that I'm not a virgin anymore...

"Almost." I feel how my cheeks pinked at the memory.

"Wait, did you to have sex?" Kate asks. I nod and then put my hands over my face in shame. Don't get me wrong I'm not ashamed of doing it with him but rather talking about it. _Wait... have I broken the NDA now?_ I need to ask Christian about the specifics of that damn document. "Well, well, well... little innocent Ana isn't so innocent anymore," Kate laughs. Gavin is also laughing.

"Now tell us how was it?" Kate asks eagerly.

"Wait, Jose just walked in the door. I'm sure he wants to hear this," Gavin says. "Hear what?" I hear Jose asking.

"Ana was going to tell us about her first time, we were waiting for you," Gavin says with suggestive and provocative tone. The kind of tone I imagine the snake in the Adam and Eve story to have.

"What?!" Jose runs towards the computer and pops up to the screen looking excited. "Spill it!"

"It was good. Very good, I think," I say trying to hide how extremely embarrassed I am.

"Do you think or know?" Jose asks expectantly.

"I don't have that much to compare it to," I say apologetically.

"Did you come?" Kate asks.

Shit. Why is she so direct? I feel how my whole face reddening at her question. I really need to grow up and stop thinking that sex is so embarrassing. This is ridiculous.

"Yes," I whisper. Kate walks up to me and takes my hands into her own. "That's good, Ana! Christian has to be very good in bed." _If you only knew, Kate._

"My first time was awful," Kate continues and looks disgusted.

"Mine too," The boys agree.

"Really?" I ask interested. This is not really something we've talked about before. Which is surprising considering that Jose and Kate have absolutely no boundaries while Gavin and I have too many.

"Yes, Steve Patrone. High school's biggest idiot." she shudders. "He was rough and I wasn't prepared. We were both drunk. You know the stereotypical teenage fiasco. Ugh, it took me half a year for me to build up the courage to try again. Not with him, though, the stupid fuck. I was too young... It was good of you to wait until you were ready,"

"That sounds awful, Kate."

"It was and it probably took me another full year to get an orgasm during the actual act. But I'm happy for you, Ana. Now, you know what we're all talking about, right?"

"I guess so," I laugh.

* * *

It's around eight when Taylor stops in front of a mansion that seems to have been taken straight out from the countryside in England. The property is beautiful with a lot of greenery and manicured flowerbeds all around. Everything is well kept and proper. I'm almost afraid to walk up to it, afraid of destroying something on my way to the front door. My leg bounces up and down frantically, a behavior that only appears when I'm stressed or nervous. The ride here has been alarmingly quiet which only makes me even more nervous.

"Don't do that," Christian says.

"Sorry," I say. I sigh and make myself stop, stilling my leg.

"Not that, the overthinking things, Anastasia."

He leans over and takes my hand in his. He kisses my knuckles lightly. "Are you ready?"

I nod and he squeezes my hand lightly in an attempt to calm me down."

"This is my first time as well," he smiles and winks at me. I looked at him surprised. He doesn't seem like a "winker" but I stand corrected. He leads me out of the car towards the house where Grace Trevelyan-Grey is standing waiting for us. She looks poised in pencil skirt and blouse. Even though the attire is very formal she manages to make it casual, like this her version of sweatpants and a t-shirt. _Remember to thank Kate for letting me borrow her dress,_ I remind myself _._ It's in a soft, pastel pink and the hem ends right by my knees. Behind her is a man I assume to be Mr. Grey: tall, blonde and in his own way a very good looking man.

"Anastasia, you've already met my mom, Grace, and this is my dad, Carrick."

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Grey." I smile and shake his hand, making a conscious effort to make it firm and confident.

"The pleasure is mine, Anastasia." His eyes are blue and friendly, a lot like Elliot's.

"Please, call me Ana. Only my dad calls me Anastasia... And that's only when he is angry." I smile and laugh a little at my comment.

"I call you, Anastasia," Christian says raising his eyebrow and looking at me surprised.

"Yeah, but you're almost always irritated at me, so, I figured it wouldn't make much of a difference anyway." I laugh. Christian's smile widens a bit and I can hear his parents laughing with me.

"Welcome, Ana. Nice to see you again." Grace hugs me. "Come in," she continues sounding excited and leads us in towards the enormous house they call home.

"Are they here yet?" I hear someone scream from inside the house. I look at Christian worriedly but I see him roll his eyes.

"It's just Mia," and even though his tone says "annoying little sister" there is something in his tone and body language that tells me that he loves his sister. It's obvious by the way he watches her come into the foyer) that he adores her. If I didn't know that this was his sister, then I've would've been very jealous. I see Mia bouncing down the stairs.

"You're here!" she exclaims and runs over to hug me. "Thank you for not telling," she whispers. Mia holds me at arm's length and smiles at me. She backs away a bit and I get the chance to look around. There are dark wood marble floors, antique carpets and a huge staircase that leads to the upper floors.

"You know this is the first time Christian has ever brought someone home," Mia says excitedly.

Christian rolls his eyes again at his little sister.

"Calm down, Mia," Grace tells her daughter. "Hello, darling." she continues and kisses Christian on his cheeks. Christian returns the gesture with a smile and then shakes his father's hand. Grace gestures for everyone to walk into the living room.

The room is elegant and tastefully decorated in whites, browns and light blue. Elliot and Kate are already here, sitting together on the sofa while each is holding a glass of champagne. Kate waves her hand at me. Christian's arm finds my waist and I feel him pull me against him. I can feel everyone watching us closely. _This is starting to get creepy_.

"Would you like anything to drink?" Mr. Grey finally asks.

"Yes, please." Christian and I say at the same time. I laugh nervously; _this is getting weirder and weirder._

"The food is almost ready," Grace announces and heads to the kitchen with Mia.

Christian leads me towards the other sofa. I make sure to cross my legs at my ankles)while seated so that I don't accidentally flash someone.

"We were just talking vacations," Mr. Grey says politely to me. "Elliot and Kate have decided to go to Barbados together later this summer." I look at Kate surprised. She never said anything about that but she sure looks happy. "Are you going somewhere now that you've finished your studies?" he asks.

"I was thinking about going to Georgia for a few days," I answer.

Christian looks confused for a fraction of a second before putting on his poker face. Now he's unreadable. I forgot I haven't _mentioned_ anything to him yet. _Fuck_!

"Georgia?" Carrick asks curiously.

"My mom lives there, I haven't seen her in a while," I explain to him.

"When were you planning on leaving?" Christian asks.

"I don't know. As soon as possible, maybe tomorrow."

"For how long?" Christian asks calmly, almost too calm. It is apparent, to me, that he is keeping his cool in front of everyone.

"I don't know. It depends on how things turn out." I say, hoping that a publishing company will soon offer me an interview even though I've already agreed to start the internship at GEH in July. Still, I hope that I get a chance to realize my dream of becoming a publisher.

In the meanwhile, Kate smiles at Christian quite deviously. She has something in the works judging by her conniving look. I see that her hand is on Elliot's knee; the gesture seems very relaxed even intimate for some reason... and public. It's not something that I can't see Christian doing to me, he is not much for public displays of affection, but on the other hand, he does have his arm around me so maybe he is.

"Dinner is served," Grace announces and leads us to the dining room. There is a crystal chandelier hanging from the ceiling and beneath it, there is a big, dark wood table. Whoever set the table did so beautifully with a porcelain vase with pink peonies as the centerpiece. Everything in this house is very beautiful. We all sit down around the table, there doesn't seem to be a set seating, so, I just follow Christian and sit beside him. Mr. Grey is sitting to my left while Christian sits at my right. Mia comes and sits down beside Christian- she squeezes his hand.

"You know you guys never told me where you all met." Mia states sounding very curious. "I really want to know."

"She interviewed me for the school newspaper," Christian says.

"Kate was the editor and she made me conduct the interview because she had the flu." I chime in quickly trying to change the focus back to Kate.

"Hey, you're not telling the whole story," Kate exclaims. Elliot nods excitedly and says. "In fact, the first time we all met was for four years ago."

"What?!" Mia exclaims to Elliot. "Why haven't you told me? I thought you told me everything."

"I do and I did tell you." Elliot states.

"No, you didn't. I think I would've remembered if you'd told me that Christian had met a girl." Mia states Elliot looks at Mia intensely as if trying to make her memories reappear from thin air. Mr. Grey looks confused; apparently, he is completely unaware of the story while Grace smiles knowingly at him.

A few moments pass. "No!" Mia exclaims. "You're her?! The girl he accidentally pushed so that she broke her hand?"

I blush. "The one and only," I state nervously. "It wasn't his fault I wasn't looking where I was going and crashed into him..." I continue quickly.

"I'm confused, can someone please tell me the story? I appear to be the only one who doesn't know," Carrick says.

"My friend Brad invited me to a party by WSU and I dragged Christian with me to be my wingman." Elliot starts laughing. Hard. "I don't know why I chose Christian as my wingman because he is absolute shit at it. He didn't even try. But, by some miracle, I convinced him to leave his office and come with me to the party, but as usual, he was a fucking party pooper all night. He did nothing but moan and complain, but what else would you expect of the billionaire recluse." He continues jokingly.

"Elliot it was a waste of time. And the party was shit." Christian says defensively.

"Elliot and Christian. Language!" Grace exclaims sternly. Both Elliot and Christian ignore her remark.

"Anyhow, we arrive at the party everything is fine and dandy until Ana came out of nowhere with drinks in her hand and crashed into Christian. Next thing I know there's a gorgeous blond screaming at Christian for hurting her friend, aka Kate. Kate, Christian and I agreed that we should take Ana to the hospital but Ana didn't agree with that so she started screaming at Christian after he had been a jerk to her even after the accident. And let me tell you, you don't want Ana angry with you because she's scary. We go to the hospital and the doctor just took one look at Ana's hand and says that it's broken. Christian made arrangements to pay her bills and we went back to Seattle, I never saw them again until five weeks ago." Elliot tells everyone.

It was quiet for a little while. "But, how did you and Kate meet again?" Mia asks Elliot and Kate.

My face suddenly feels very hot after the memory of me drunk dialing Christian surfaces my brain. Kate snorts loudly and Christian starts to laugh softly beside me while Elliot makes no attempt to hide his huge grin. I decide that I should just explain myself than let him embarrass me further. It's better to just get it over with.

"After I met Christian at the interview, he asked me out on a date..." I begin.

"And you said no and ran away," Christian says a bit dejected but with a hint of humor. I hear a few gasps.

"But, I came back and said yes..." I try to defend myself.

"After half an hour!"

"Better late than never?" I ask meekly. Christian shrugs his shoulders. He puts his hand on my leg. Christian's hand feels warm and encouraging.

"I stormed back to his office and told him yes that I would go on a date with him. I had already applied for the internship at GEH and I felt that if I were to take the opportunity that it would be a conflict of interest of sorts. After a while, I decided that it didn't matter, so I went back and I gave him my number and he didn't call. I waited for days but he still didn't call. So, Kate encouraged me to call him because 'I'm a strong independent woman' and all that jazz but I didn't have his number. So, Kate called her father and asked for it."

"My father owns Kavanagh Media." Kate clarifies for Mia, Grace, and Carrick. They nod.

"I needed a bit of liquid courage so I rang him after Kate and I _had a friend over for drinks to hang out before finals week started._." I quickly finish.

"Oh, Carrick, I'm so glad we did not have mobile phones when we started dating," Grace laughs. "That would've been embarrassing." She laughs. Both Carrick and Grace look really amused by the story. This makes me relax a little because I didn't want them to have a bad impression of me. That would be disastrous. Mia, on the other hand, is chuckling loudly beside Christian.

"Tell me, how's Ana when she's drunk?" She asks.

"Oh, she's like Ana but without a filter and she laughs at everything. She has a tendency to spill her secrets when she's drunk but surprisingly not anyone else's. If it's one thing Ana's good at is keeping secrets." Kate tells everyone.

"You're not so bad yourself," I say softly.

"Then I have to warn you - Elliot and Mia are terrible at keeping secrets," Carrick says, smiling lovingly at his children. "I was going to arrange a surprise for Grace last year and she found out an hour later. If you want to keep something a secret then don't tell these two." he laughs.

"Hey!" Mia and Elliot protest simultaneously. "I can keep my mouth shut if I want to," Elliot says and looks at Christian like he is waiting for Christian to back him up. But, Christian just looks at him with a look that begs him to shut up.

We all start eating our food, which tastes divine. I notice Mia looking very pleased with herself when she sees everyone's reaction to the food we are currently eating. I think she made the food herself! Holy, mother of God, that girl can cook. The plate consists of chorizo with scallops and grilled bell pepper. I eat and enjoy my food excitedly.

"Did you watch the Mariners game, dad?" Elliot asks his father. The two men start to talk about sports. Elliot, Carrick, and even Mia talk excitedly about the game. Christian does join in with a few comments here and there about the subject. I didn't know he was a Mariner's fan. Grace asks Kate and me about the move.

While Kate tells her every single detail about our move to Seattle, I drift off for a minute and think about what Christian told me earlier today. He misses the lifestyle... I'm not really enough for him anymore. Could I change for him? Should I change for him? Is it really a change? I don't even know what he wants - does he want a submissive or does he want rough sex? Because the rough sex bit I'm down at trying but I can't be a submissive. I think going to Georgia for a few days will be a good thing. We both need to clear our heads and get our priorities straight, especially Christian.

When I come back up from my thoughts I hear that Mia and Kate are talking about Paris. They make it sound like it's the best place in the world.

"Have you been in Paris, Ana?" Mia asks innocently.

"No, but I would like to go."

"We had our honeymoon in Paris," Grace says while looking lovingly at her husband. He smiles back.

"It's a wonderful city of you don't take into account the Parisians." Mia agrees. "You should take Ana with you sometime Christian."

"I think Ana would prefer to go to London," Christian says.

I look at him. He remembered... His hand that is currently in my lap slowly moves upward... I slap the hand away and give him a meaning look. _Not right now!_ I scream at him through my eyes. He looks irritated.

"What's wrong with the Parisians?" Elliot asks Mia. "They didn't fall for your charm?"

"No, they didn't. And my chef, he was a real tyrant. So damn controlling." She exclaims.

After we've finished eating the delicious meal, Kate and I help to take all the dishes back to the kitchen. A small part of me is wondering why the boys didn't help with the dishes as well but decide to not to think more about it right now. Kate is talking excitedly with Mia about clothes and planning out a shopping trip together which was my cue to zone out of their conversation. I hate shopping and my only requirements for the clothes I wear are that they are cute and comfortable. You would've thought that I'd learned something by now from Kate, but I haven't. I couldn't care less about the newest fashion trends.

"How's the job search going?" Grace asks me.

"I haven't heard anything from any publishing houses yet," I tell her disappointedly. "So, I've accepted an internship in the meanwhile, so that I can get a better work experience."

She nods with a kind smile. "That sounds wise, my dear. Just have patience." I sigh and nod at her advice. I hate waiting... I have no patience at all. That's why when Ray took me fishing I always brought a book with me so that I didn't have to wait. But, I know that she's right and that I need to persevere.

"Eh, Grace would you tell me where your bathroom is?" I ask Grace shyly.

"Go down the hall and then it's just the first door to the left." she directs.

After I thank her, I follow her directions to the bathroom. I feel that the wine I drank with dinner is starting to cloud up my brain. I grab the granite countertop and look myself in the mirror. Even though I look the same as I've always done, I don't feel the same. I feel better about myself, happier, and a lot of that it's thanks to Christian. He has helped me realize what my body is capable of. I ponder if what my mom said is true. Am I in love with him? And as I look myself in the mirror again I know that it is true. _Oh... this sucks._

When Christian realizes that I can't be everything that he wants, everything he says he needs, he is going to dump me and go on to find a submissive. My infatuation with him is going to make our impending "break-up" hurt a thousand times more. _He is going to be my boss_. If we break up, and even if we don't then we'll have to keep it professional. He is the CEO, he should be able to keep a professional relationship with me, and so will I. I lean down toward the faucet and drink a bit of water.

As I walk out of the bathroom, I feel his tight hand pull me against him. Christian pushes me softly against the wall and looks me in the eyes. He looks furious.

"When were you planning on telling me about your trip to Georgia?" He asks menacingly.

"I don't know. My mom called this afternoon and asked me to come over. It was more of a spur of the moment thing." I try to explain. "Christian, don't be angry with me."

"Why shouldn't I when you're leaving me?"

"I'm not! I'm just visiting my mom. Christian, please can we discuss this later?" I caress his cheek softly feeling his slight stubble. My fingers continue to wander to his jaw and his sideburns. Christian closes his eyes and relaxes a little bit. I put my other hand on the back of his head and start massaging the nape of neck gently. He puts his hands on my lower back.

"What are you doing?" he asks. I've never seen him so vulnerable and so unsure.

"Kissing you," I answer him.

"But you said no."

"What?"

"At dinner, with your legs."

"Christian, we were eating dinner with your parents. I wasn't saying no, but more like, later." He nods, not saying anything. I kiss him softly on the lips. And give him a reassuring smile looking deep into his eyes. "Maybe we should get going soon. It seems like we have a few things we need to talk about." Christian says.

"Maybe we should." I reply.


	19. Chapter 19 - The Break

**Hello everyone!**

 **I'm sorry that it has been a while. I've recently started studying at college after a gap year and its been very overwhelming and before that some personal stuff happened. I hope that this chapter doesn't dissapoint.**

 **Ps. Excuse any misstakes concerning grammar or spelling.**

 **Have a nice day/night whereever you are in the world!**

* * *

 **Chapter 19 - The Break**

The way back to Christian's apartment was even quieter than the ride to his parent's house. Christian is checking something on his phone while I look out the window watching the scenery change rapidly as we pass it. Taylor has put on the radio, so at least there isn't a deafening silence around us. As awful as this sounds this is the first time that I've really noticed Taylor driving the car. The realization makes me feel bad as the silence makes his presence even more noticeable. I also wonder what he has seen throughout his career as Christian's head of security - all the submissives through the years, his nightmares and him secluding himself with work, BDSM, and training. I doubt that someone knows Christian as well as Taylor does.

As I look out the window I sometimes catch my reflection on the glass. My makeup is still flawless thanks to Kate and even I have to admit that I look good. But, I can see in my eyes the worry that I'm not allowing myself to feel. I try to repress all emotions like nervousness, anxiety, and fear. This conversation has to be done rationally and not with emotions clouding my judgment. I've laid all my cards on the table and now it's up to Christian to show his. A sigh escapes my mouth and I feel how I start to slouch in my seat. I don't really recognize my surroundings so I make a mental note to explore the city more. To find all its hidden jewels and see what this city has to offer with or without Christian.

Now we're sitting at his dining room table just like I did the first time I was here. How fitting that Christian chose the same spot where it all started. We face each other and I can't help but feel like this is some kind of business agreement and that doesn't really sit well with me. This is somehow way to formal, but wasn't that what I wanted before? To be rational and without emotion. Christian has his hands interlaced and looks me intensively in the eyes like he is trying to read my thoughts somehow.

"Well, it seems like my family also likes you," he says plainly. I suspect that Christian has some kind of feelings for me, I'm not that blind. I can hear it the way he talks to me, the way he treats me even in the way he looks at me. For God's sake, even his siblings have noticed his feelings for me. The only question left is if those feelings are enough for him to try a more conventional relationship or at least some combination of it.

"Do you have to leave for Georgia?" Christian asks. His voice void of any emotion.

"Yes." I breathe. "The only reason I brought it up was because Kate was talking about Barbados. I didn't realize I had made a decision to go and see my mom until I said it out loud" I continue and as I reach out for his hands I tell him "It wasn't my intention for you to be caught off guard. I'm sorry."

"Do you want to visit your mother?"

"Yes, Christian she is trying to build up some kind of relationship with me. That hasn't happened in years! She seems like she is in a good place now with Bob. I think that I owe it to her and to me to try and build up our relationship again."

He looks at me with a strange look in his eyes, like he is fighting a thought in his head.

"Can I come with you?" Christian asks out of nowhere. My eyes widen and take in his almost apologetic look. He looks vulnerable. Well, I wasn't expecting him to say that.

"Oh, I don't think that is such a good idea. I was thinking that I would give you some space to let you think about your options. Or rather what you want out of this relationship."

Christian shakes his head slowly and sighs. "I already know what I want out of this relationship, Ana. What was it that changed? Is it the BDSM?"

"No, Christian it isn't like that and you know it," I say defensively. "It is like I said to you before Christian. I can't be you're submissive, I don't have what it takes to be a submissive out of the bedroom. I do like you being a bit rough in the bed like we have already established and I'm not opposed to bringing in some new elements to our sex life. But, nevertheless, either we're partners, you know equals outside of the bedroom, or we don't have a relationship at all. That's all I can offer you, I'm sorry, I really am if that is not what you want or need but I need to think about myself too. I don't want to lose myself just to please you no matter how much this may potentially hurt." I take a deep breath.

"Ana, I don't know anything else," Christian says desperately. "This is all I know. You have to understand."

"I know but Christian don't you realize that you were already doing it before you brought up the issue? I know that your mom's friend fucked you up but Christian we can learn together. You forget that I'm just as inexperienced in the relationship department as you are. If you want to do this then we'll learn together and fail together, as a couple. Tell me, what do you want to change in this relationship? Don't you already see me as a girlfriend or do you see me as your submissive?"

"I don't know. All of this is so confusing" he says irritated.

"You say that I'm your girlfriend and that has to mean something. Doesn't it?"

"Of course it does. When I say something I mean it, and you know it." He says pointedly.

"Then I REALLY don't understand what you want, Christian," I say sharply. I take deep, calming breath before continuing. "That's why I think it's a good idea for us to get a breather. To give us some time to think. You do understand, don't you?"

He nods "Doesn't mean I like it."

I put my hand on his cheek and smile at him. I don't want to lose you, I think to myself but I can't bring myself to say those words out loud. Instead, I say" I don't like this either but I think that this we'll be good for us."

Christian sighs and takes my hand and leads me towards the living room where he proceeds to disappear behind me to fiddle with his iPod. The soft, deep voice of Frank Sinatra fills the air as he sings of his baby and the road. Christian walks towards me slowly but with a clear goal. As he takes my hands, he closes the distance between us and pushes his body against mine.

"Dance with, Miss Steele"

I nod, although I know that I'm a terrible dancer, especially if I'm supposed to dance with somebody else. The dance, or rather the swaying was sweet and innocent. It didn't feel sexual at all just natural, almost like a hug that went on for too long. My hands are around his neck carefully avoiding any sensitive areas. I would like nothing more than to press my face into his chest and just inhale his masculine scent, but I don't think that would be a good idea. I don't want to cause him any discomfort or hurt and I would never intentionally hurt him, just the thought makes me sick. I wonder if the pedophile at least respected his boundaries.

"Did you love her?" I ask him carefully. Surprised that the words escaped my mouth.

"Did I love whom?" he asks back.

"Mrs. Robinson,"

Unexpectedly Christian starts laughing. He stops the swaying and looks me in the eyes with a light of humor in them, he thinks this is funny. We just stand still in the same position completely still just staring at each other. Then he becomes more serious and presses his lips together briefly before responding "Why is that important? It's all in the past, Anastasia."

"Because it's because of her that you're having doubts. She's the one who introduced you to the lifestyle, right?"

"Yes, but she isn't here. It's all in the past. It's over." he responds defensively. His voice raises a little.

"Then why can't you answer a simple question? Either you loved her or you didn't." I answer him calmly.

Christian sighs "No. I didn't love her."

I nod and let out the breath I was holding, relieved to hear his answer. "Please tell me that she at least respected your boundaries."

Christian nods but doesn't say anything more about the topic. Sinatra's voice is now replaced by a quaint melody that I vaguely recognize. We begin swaying again like we were two teenagers at prom. Neither of us looks at the other person or says anything. We just sway, focusing in the moment.

"Have you bought a plane ticket yet?" Christian asks out of the blue.

"No, I'll just buy a plane ticket tomorrow."

"Do you have money?"

"Yes, I do," I say slowly like I was saying something to a child. "I appreciate your intentions but I don't need you to pay for my plane ticket, Christian."

"I do have a plane that is not supposed to be used until a few days. You're free to use it if you want." Christian offers.

I stop swaying for a minute and just stare at him. Why would he need a plane? Wasn't it enough with the helicopter and the car he already owns? I didn't know that he had a plane. I feel a slight panic as the realization of how rich he is starting to slowly sink in. We're so different. I don't think that I can even comprehend the amount of money Christian has. My first instinct is to laugh but I don't want to hurt his feelings. So, instead, I opt for kindly declining his generous offer.

"Thank you for your generous offer but I think that I'd rather fly conventionally."

"As you wish," Christian mutters even though he looks like he wants to discuss the matter farther. "I find it a bit ironic that a girl with a major in economics is so bothered by money and wealth. Why is that?" Christian continues.

"I understand the value of money and its importance in society but I've never been around big quantities of it. And it always seems, at least from the outside, that the people with the most money always are the ones with the most problems." I smile a bit uncomfortable. "It makes me anxious."

"You do have a point... But shouldn't it be my choice to choose on what or on whom I spend my hard-earned money on?"

"Yes, of course," I answer immediately. "I just don't like gifts because it always seems like I have nothing to give back."

"You don't owe me anything. You are enough Anastasia." Christian says.

"Apparently not," I mutter. Christian looks at me hurt. I take his hand and say "Let's go to bed. It's getting late."

* * *

The room is bright and the bed is empty. I look around for the now familiar silhouette of Christian's body but I can't find him in the room. There are no sounds that would indicate that he is in the bathroom either. I stand up tentatively feeling overwhelmingly hungry. I find that when I go to bed full I get very hungry in the morning, for some strange reason. Where is he? He surely didn't go to work today without saying goodbye first? As I come closer to the kitchen I hear the tell-tail sounds of pans being moved and I smell coffee.

Expecting Christian to be in the kitchen I almost jump out of my skin at the sight of a woman I haven't seen before running around in the kitchen. She looks very comfortable and like she knows where to look for certain things. She is a little over middle age and has red hair that's a bit darker in the roots. Her clothes are simple - a pair of black trousers with an accompanying shirt in the same color. The woman gives a caring and kind impression without saying a word. Gentle is the word that first comes to mind. The redheaded woman looks up and sees me staring at her. She immediately straightens up and wipes her hands on her trousers.

"Good morning, I'm Gail. Mr. Grey's housekeeper." She says with a smile.

"Hello, I'm Ana," I answer her. I feel my mind going. Should I elaborate my answer with explaining what my relationship is with her boss? She doesn't have all day, Ana. And besides she doesn't care, my subconscious sneers. "Would you like some help with breakfast?" I ask.

Gail looks at me surprised and lets out a laugh. "No miss. It's my job and I like it a lot. So, tell me, what are you in the mood for? Do you want something in particular for breakfast?"

"Oh, I'm fine. Thank you. I'm not hungry." I lie. I really don't want to be an inconvenience and besides, it feels weird asking her for something.

"Are you sure? It won't be any trouble." Gail insists.

"Of course, she'll have breakfast, Gail. Make her some pancakes and a cup of boiling water with a Twinning's breakfast teabag on the side, please." Christian says from behind me. His dressed in a suit and tie, obviously ready to take on the world.

"Right away, Mr. Grey," Gail says as she goes back to behind the counter and continues preparing breakfast. Christian and I take a seat by the kitchen counter.

"So how come that I've been basically living here for two weeks while you've been sick but this is the first time that I've meet Gail?" I ask Christian.

"She needed some personal time and has only been here once a week to clean. I do live in a big apartment so it's not that strange that you've never met her before."

"It isn't that big Christian," I tell him.

"That's not what you said." Christian blinks. Is Christian Grey making a dirty joke or is he actually meaning his apartment? The smirk on his face tells witch one of the answers is correct.

I snort. "So, you make penis-jokes now?" I ask him with a smile. "I think that maybe your dear brother is rubbing off on you."

"Maybe." He laughs. Wow, he's really in a good mood. Is it because I'm going away? The thought comes with a jab of pain. I try to hide it as best as I can with a smile. By that time Gail had put a cup of boiling water and teabag in front of me. I thank her quietly as a dunk the teabag in the water only to put it on the plate underneath my teacup.

"So, you're in a good mood."

"How can I not when I woke up next to you in my bed." He says. The sound of frying pan rattling against the floor makes me jump. Gail looks at us and then the floor shocked like she can't believe that she did that. I hurry to her side and help her clean up the mess.

"Oh, I'm so sorry." She exclaims. While she picks up the pan. I quickly take a rag and wipe away the omelet and the grease that ended up on the kitchen floor.

"Are you okay?" I ask her. "The pan must've been hot. You didn't burn yourself, right?"

"Gail are you alright?" Christian asks his maid.

"Yes, I'm fine. Sorry, I don't know what happened. I'll clean up the mess immediately."

I notice though that she is holding her hand close to her body as she speaks. She has to have burned herself. "Are you sure? Let me see your hand." I ask her. "My dad's parents are doctors so he taught me some tricks. I could help you with that burn."

Most of the mess is cleaned up, so the only thing left on the floor is some grease, but that's easily fixed. Her palm of her hand is bright red. It doesn't look good. She probably put her hand to close to pan. I quickly grab my teabag from dish and put it on the burned skin.

"I know it's weird but trust me this helps. The tannic acid from the black tea draws out the heat from the wound." I explain. "My dad taught me this trick after I started drinking tea. Just let it sit for a minute or two. I can finish off breakfast." I offer.

"No, Miss. I'm okay. Really." Gail says. I look at her skeptically and look at Christian begging him with my eyes to let me finish off breakfast.

"Gail, let the tea bag sit there for a moment. We can manage to cook breakfast. Let Taylor take a look at it."

"Sir, I'm fine." She starts.

"It's an order," Christian says gently but firmly.

Gail sighs, nods and leaves the kitchen swiftly. I quickly cook breakfast, which consists of pancakes since Gail managed to make the batter before she burned herself. I really hope she's okay.

"That's some quick thinking," Christian observes.

"I guess." I shrug. "I'm just glad that I finally get some use of all the training my dad put me through. You would've thought that he was training me to be a nurse or a doctor with all the first aids classes he forced me to take."

The kitchen is quiet while I cook the pancakes.

Christian nods. I put forward a plate of pancakes in front of him. I go back to my seat and start eating. I'm starving. He looks at me intently. It seems like his good mood from before disappeared when Gail dropped the pan. His silence is making me nervous but at the same time I don't know what I want or should say.

"Are you still leaving?" Christian asks.

"Yes, but only for a few days."

"When?"

"I haven't bought a ticket yet but as soon as possible."

"It sounds like your running away."

I look at him with a scowl. I'm not running away! It's him that's pushing me away! I look down at my food and cut the pancakes with more force than necessary. I stuff my mouth with food to not say something stupid.

"It wasn't my intention to make you angry," Christian says. "I can have Taylor drive you to the airport."

"I have a car. What's the point of lending me a car if you never let me use it?" I snap.

Christian looks at me and looks exasperated and frustrated. He runs his hands through his hair and pulls at it slightly. "You're the most frustrating and confusing woman I have ever met. I'll see you in a few days." He says before going towards the front door.

My tears start to run with the sound of the elevator's arrival. What the hell is my problem? What the hell is our problem? We just keep pushing each other away. I cover my face my hands and try to slow down my breathing. It'll be alright, Anastasia. You just need to believe that everything will be alright. Deep breath in, deep breath out.

I slowly stand to take care of the dishes and take my time to get ready for the day.

* * *

My apartment seems a bit bigger and emptier without Kate here. One part of me is very thankful for the fact that Kates inquisition we'll have to wait for another day and another part of me doesn't want to feel alone. I pack my bag rather quickly so that I can spend more time looking for plane tickets. The text message I sent to Kate asking for permission to use her laptop changed its status from sent to received as I put on some music to try to drown out the silence.

In the meanwhile, I look for flights on my phone. There is one leaving around four which should give me enough time to do everything I need to do. As quickly as I get an okay from Kate I book my tickets on her computer. I send 3 messages with my leaving and arrival time to Kate, my mother, and Christian. Both my mother and Kate answer almost immediately.

Almost three hours have passed since I sent the message but Christian has still not answered his phone. I feel a stab of pain in my chest and the thought that passes my mind tells me that this is how I'm going to feel for as long that I don't see him. This hurt, longing and missing after only a few hours of not seeing him lead me to the conclusion that my mother is right – I'm in love Christian Grey. I feel a tear escape my eye as the realization hits. I know it's true and what hurts, even more, is that I'm not enough. I'm not good enough for him.

I'm sitting on a cab on my way to the airport trying to think about anything but Christian. The irony that I'm taking a cab when I had an argument with Christian about taking my own car is not lost on me. I'm just trying to keep it together until I'm alone. The taxi driver hasn't said anything which I'm very thankful for. He doesn't even have the radio on, which in itself is kind of weird. But, whatever, I just want to get as far away from here as possible.

Sea-Tac looks greyer and more boring than ever. I pay the taxi driver what I owe him and watch him drive away back to the city. The walk to the booth where an attendant is waiting to check me on my flight seems very long. And as begin to approach the booth I hear my phone starting to ring. In my hurry to get to the phone I drop my things loudly making a few people turn around to look at me more closely. But my phone is nowhere to be found in my bag and that's when I realize that I had my phone in my back pocket all along. I chuckle at my own stupidity.

On my screen is an unknown number and I consider for a moment to let it go to voicemail, but, think better of it.

"This is Anastasia Steele talking. How can I help you?"

"Hey, it's Elliot Grey. Where are you?" he sounds very serious and very uncharacteristically Elliot.

"Sea-Tac. Why? What's the matter?"

"It's Christian."

"What do you mean."

"He's missing and we can't find his helicopter."

* * *

 **Yes, I know! I'll write as soon as I can!**


	20. Chapter 20 - The Return

**Chapter 20 – The Return**

Everything is numbed. I sit on Christian's couch holding myself, my knees are against my chest and my arms are around them. People are moving frantically around the room. Grace is crying in a corner with Mia, Elliot is pacing around the room and throwing glances at the TV waiting for some news about his brother, Gail is running around the room trying to get people what they need in form of snacks and Taylor and Carrick are the phone asking questions that people don't have any answers for. Because the truth is nobody knows what happened. This is what we know; Christian Grey bordered his helicopter – Charlie Tango – with his second in command Ros Bailey at 12.23 and landed in Portland for a meeting shortly thereafter. After an unsuccessful meeting, the pair bordered the helicopter to commence the trip back home. Since there were a lot of aircrafts in the air the tower gave them another route, a longer one, through the woods back to Seattle. After that, the details become more hazy and unclear. It has been hours since they disappeared. The authorities haven't found Charlie Tango in the dense woods and nobody has an inkling on where they could be. So, that leaves us here, in Christians apartment desperate for any news.

Somebody lit the fireplace and the flames capture my attention. I know there must be sounds around me but everything seems muffled like I'm underwater. The news about Christian and Ros broke out and is going around the clock on every news outlet and channel. Everyone who is associated with the company, or better yet, with the people who disappeared has their phone blowing up. But, the fact that my relationship with him isn't a well-known fact means that I've been spared from the commotion. The only people who have called are my parents and Jose and Gavin. The media seem to love the situation though, they've even had a few interviews with sketchy people with some bogus associations to the pair.

"They'll find him," Mia says as she wraps her arms around me. "It's Christian we're talking about… we'll find him." I nod silently and continue to stare at the dancing flames around the logs. "Ana, you're freezing. I'll get a sweater for you."

The last thing we did was argue all because of me because I wanted to take my car to the airport and then I didn't even use it. It's like a proverbial slap in the face. That was a bitchy, stupid and petty move. I feel guilty… as I should. The whole situation even before the helicopter, was complicated, and now I feel like everything is spinning out of control. We have problems in our relationship, and I've put all the blame on him. I said that I wouldn't judge him but I have, time and time again. At first, with his lifestyle, I forced him to quit, no questions asked about his needs. And then I've judged his wealth. The money he works so hard for. It's not a secret that money makes me uncomfortable, but I have never stopped and considered why he wants to give me extravagant gifts. It's his way of showing that he cares and I've been too harsh and rash. I should've talked to him about my insecurities and feelings concerning all of it but I didn't. I just kept it all bottled up and expected him to just magically understand. My insecurities are all based on the same feeling – that I'm not good enough. My insecurities made me lash out. It doesn't make it okay but it makes it more understandable.

The blame though, if you could even call it that, isn't only on me. This relationship has gone so fast. In a blink of an eye, we went from single, immature people to a steady and serious relationship. And I think that is the main reason why Christian started to have doubts about his needs. I'm not ready to be a submissive, I'll never be one outside of the bedroom and he knows that but he seemed satisfied until that point and if his needs are purely only sexual with time we could develop and include new elements in our sex life until we reach a point where we're both satisfied. People say that you need to learn to walk before you run, and we started a cross-country marathon before we could even crawl.

I love him and I never even got a chance to tell him.

"Here, Ana." Gail hands me a cup of tea bringing me back to the reality as Kate sits down beside me.

"Thank you, Gail," I tell her as I try to smile but it turned into more of a grimace. She goes back to the kitchen. Mia hands me a big Harvard sweater that's way too big for me. It has to be Christian's. I didn't know he went to Harvard… It takes courage to drop out of college to pursue your passion, and somehow it all seems even more daunting when you drop out of such a prestigious college. Someone that brave can't just disappear… right? She turns and sits across me on U-shaped sofa with Grace their holding hands. They're both looking at me worriedly. Even though they're not genetically mother and daughter they look very similar.

"Ana, I came as soon as I could. He will come back to you, I have no doubt in my mind. You two are made for each other. He has too." Kate says as she forcibly takes my cold hand.

"Kate, what do I do if he doesn't?" My voice cracks. "I can't even remember what the last thing I said to him was. We argued… that can't be the last thing he heard from me."

"Ana, don't speak like that. It sounds like you already made up your mind. He is not dead."

"How do you know?"

"I just do. It doesn't make any sense otherwise. You two haven't had any time. You will get YOUR time." She says forcibly. "And if even he is, which he isn't, you have me, Gavin and Jose and your parents."

"And us," Grace says. "You two girls have us as well." I look at her. "You and my son are going to have plenty of time. I have no doubt about it."

He has been gone for eight hours without any sign of life and the numbness in me grows for every moment without him. Please, whoever is up there, let him be alright and let him come home to me.

A voice penetrates the fog in my mind. "The 27-year-old billionaire and his COO Ros Bailey who has been missing for the past 12 hours have been found and are now returning to Seattle as we speak. No comment has been made about their wellbeing."

I stare at the TV unbelieving my ears. Kate squeals excitedly and so does Mia. Grace just lets out a deep breath and Elliot takes Kate in his arms and spins her around. He's safe. Just then the pling of the elevator announces the arrival of Christian. Mia sprints into his arms forgoing any caution to his phobia, closely followed by his mother, brother, and father. I even see Taylor and Gail hugging and kissing each other in the kitchen. But I'm frozen in my seat and I can't believe that he is here. He doesn't feel real. There is nowhere I'd rather be than in his arms but I'll just wait until he's done with his waiting party. He even receives a kiss from Kate. Christian searches the room for something until he finds me glued to the sofa. He starts walking towards me. "Let me say hi to my girl?"

"Ana?" he asks carefully like I'm the one who has been missing for 12 hours.

The sound of his voice breaks the spell I'm bound in and without any thought, I run towards him until I'm in his arms. He is real and he really is safe. He smells like sweat, dirt, and Christian.

"Oh, Christian." I start to cry again.

"Shhh." He comforts me.

I look up at him when I discover that he has a bit of blood in his hairline and I quickly back away to check for any other injuries. "Are you hurt?" I touch his forehead as he flinches. "Has a doctor given you the all clear? Have you been at the hospital? What happened?" The questions keep flying out of my mouth without giving him a chance of answering any of them.

I hug him again hard. "I thought that I had lost you," I whisper.

"I see that. I'm not going anywhere." He answers.

I nod. "So?" Mia asks him. His family has gathered around us and watching our embrace. Grace and Elliot stare at me like they have never seen me before. Their eyes show mixed feelings but mostly shock and happiness. My face is against Christians' chest and he hasn't even flinched…

"What?" Christian asks.

"Have you been checked out by a doctor? Have you been at the hospital? What happened?" she repeats my question.

"Could I get a beer before the inquisition?" he asks.

"No," Grace says. "That depends on the first two answers. Alcohol could make things worse if you have a concussion for example."

"No. I haven't seen a doctor. I just wanted to go home."

Grace nods. "Let me check for a concussion and then you can have a glass."

She shines a light on his face and asks him a few questions. He never releases my hand.

"You don't have any symptoms of a concussion but as soon as you get a headache or any problems with your sight you need to go to the hospital right away. Do you understand me?"

"Yes, mother." Carrick appears with a glass of amber liquid. "I thought you'd like something stronger. Now tell us what happened?" he says.

Christian takes a big chug of his drink before he starts to talk. He tells us how everything had gone as usual and that all the controls had passed inspection before takeoff but how they started failing while in the air. Both engines had collapsed and started burning which had them making an emergency landing in the middle of nowhere. After they made it out of the aircraft and put out the fire they started to try to get to civilization. There had been no service in the woods and their phones eventually ran out of battery. They had walked the woods for hours when they finally found the main road and were able to lift with a trucker named Seth who wanted nothing in return even though they offered every dollar they had on them. He apparently told them that knowing that he had helped someone in need was payment enough. They tried calling us with the man's phone but neither Ros or Christian could any phone numbers by heart and they couldn't google it, so, they just concentrated on getting home.

"I didn't expect the welcome comity," Christian says.

"What you thought we wouldn't care that you were missing?" Grace says angrily. "Are you crazy?! We were all so worried. For somebody who is so smart, you sure can be stupid." Christian looks at me surprised at his mother's remark.

"I thought you would be in Georgia by now." He says. I look at him shocked.

"If you think that I would go to Georgia while you're missing or hurt then you're more stupid than smart," I tell him softly.

He chuckles. "I think you're the only one outside of my family who has dared to call me stupid." He says.

"I can say it again if you want." He smiles, I put my hand on his cheek.

"You were on the news," Mia says.

"Yes, I gather as much when I was welcomed by photographers and journalists outside. I'm sorry for worrying you mom."

I put my head on his shoulder and I start crying again. This time the tears reflect my gratitude to whoever let my prayers become reality. He is well and he is home.

"Hey, it's okay. You don't need to cry." Christian says softly to me.

"I'm sorry," I say. "I can't stop them from coming."

"But how could both engines just give out?" Carrick asks concerned.

"I don't know, dad. All I know is that it is late and that I'll deal with all those questions tomorrow." Carrick nods.

"I think what my brother is trying to say is that he needs his beauty sleep. We should get going we'll see each other soon." Elliot says.

"Yes, of course. You have to be exhausted. I'm sorry." Grace says. "Call me tomorrow."

"We have the room, you can stay if you'd like," Christian says.

"No, sweetheart. We'll let you rest. We'll see you soon okay?" Grace says softly.

We follow the Grey family and Kate to the elevator where we say goodbye with a promise of seeing each other soon.

"Let's go to bed," Christian says as soon as the elevator doors closed around his family. I nod and let him lead me to his bedroom.

"I'm so tired." Christian sighs.

"Let me take care of you."

"Okay."

I slowly take off his shirt making sure that I don't touch his chest. Then continue with pants and socks leaving him in his boxers and leading him to the bed. Then I go to the bathroom take a towel and dampen it so that I could clean his forehead of the blood. The blood is dried up and takes a bit of rubbing to remove. The skin is tender, red a bit swollen around the cut but it luckily looks minor and clean. When I'm done I go towards the dresser steal one of his shirts and quickly put it on before I join him in bed. I lay beside him just looking into his eyes.

"Hey," I whisper, the lump in my throat returning.

"Hey," he whispers. "Did you miss me?" he asks.

"Only a little." He smiles at me. "Are you sure that you're okay?" I ask concerned.

"Yes, I'm alright."

"Thank god. Do you need anything?"

"No, this is perfect."

There is a small pause before I gather the courage to start to talk again "Christian I'm so sorry for the way, I acted. I made a huge deal of taking my own car to the airport and then I just took a taxi. It's so stupid and I was so scared that I had lost you. We didn't get any time and I didn't get to say anything about the important stuff to you and I kept thinking that the last memory you had of us was a petty argument."

"It's okay, babe, it's over now."

"No, Christian. I made us go backward. I promise you to make more of an effort to not make such huge deal of your money. You're right it's your money, you should decide what to spend it on. I know it's your way to show that you care but please try to understand that it is going to take some getting used to all this money you throw at me. All this is because of my insecurities. It feels like I'm never going to be enough for you but I promise to work on it and don't let my insecurities come in-between us. But, you know that I'm grateful, right? No matter what I say I'm so grateful to have you in my life. I love you no matter how much money you have in your bank account or how kinky your sexual preferences are."

"What did you say?" he asks.

"That I love you," I whisper.

"Ana, I'm all yours. What do I need to do to prove to you that you are enough? I want everything you give me. I love you."

"I know you do," I answer him.

"Smartass." He smiles as he kisses me. And as soon as his head hits his pillow he is out cold.

* * *

I wake up with a jolt dreaming that Christian was gone. I know instantly that he is right beside me but the cold feeling I have in my chest doesn't go away. As soon as I open my eyes I see him, sleeping peacefully beside me in his bed. I softly brush away his curls from his forehead.

"I thought that I had lost you," I whisper.

"You know the only thing I could think of as it happened was you," Christian says with a raspy voice and his eyes closed. "You're my talisman." He opens his eyes and looks deep into the grey orbs. "I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want you to be mine and I want to be yours." Christian says earnestly.

"I am already yours, Christian."

"No, Ana, you don't understand." He says. "As I thought that I was going to die I didn't see flashbacks of my life I saw the future. I saw a house and kids and us being happy."

As his words leave his mouth a feel my mouth opens up in shock. "Is this your way of telling me that you want kids?"

"This is my way of telling you that someday I want to be your husband and have children. I want all those things with you. I don't know when but I just know that it is going to happen."

"I'd like that," I say softly as shivers run down my arms giving me goosebumps. I like the picture his painting. "I'd like that very much. But not for a while."

"But it is going to happen." He smiles.

"Why are you so sure?" I ask him.

"Because what Christian Grey wants he gets." He whispers as he climbs on top of me and makes me forget about marriage and kids.


	21. Announcement - NOT A CHAPTER

I'm sorry for the hiatus on this story. I know that I wrote in the last chapter that more chapters would come but I feel like the creative juices for this story have completely dried out. I'm so afraid of ruining this story with a bad ending. It is ironic that my fear of a bad ending is in itself creating a bad ending. It is because of this that I've marked my story as complete.

If any of you have any ideas, for an ending or what you would like to see on the epilog, please let me know. Maybe that'll jump start the creativity again. I'm really sorry for any disappointment that came with this story.

I hope that you are happy with the story overall despite the bad or unsatisfying ending.

As always I hope that you have a good day/night wherever in the world you are.


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